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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I can't afford the trappings of a working class lifestyle

275 replies

defeatedslug · 16/04/2011 19:17

I can't afford xboxes or nintendos for the kids. We don't have a plasma telly of any size. We don't have cable or satellite TV. The kids don't have bikes. We don't have whizzy mobile phones. We don't go on overseas holidays, not even a week on a package holiday, and can barely do youth hostels in the UK. The kids don't have the latest, greatest, trendiest clothes. Their stash under the Christmas tree is pretty conservative. The kids wear hand-me-down clothes including stuff from NCT sales and freecycle. We don't eat out more than a handful of times a year, and maybe have a takeaway every 4 months. We have two very run down and battered cars. We don't smoke. DH drinks maybe 3 or 4 beers a week.

I dress the kids neatly, get them proper fitted shoes, smart school uniform, take them to the library and museums, feed them properly, make sure they're healthy. We both work, and pay a mortgage, and nursery fees. I'm not trying to start a daily-mail-a-thon benefits bashing thread, and I know there will be people that immediately start criticising, but it seems something isn't right that you can be hard-working and be materially less well off than people who don't work - there's not going to be much of an incentive to come off the benefits, is there?

I have namechanged but am regular btw (cod, rivers of sweetcorn, nice ham etc)

OP posts:
howdoyoueatyours · 16/04/2011 22:45

Could you not manage on one car OP? I think part of the reason that you've narked a lot of people is that you are claiming you can't afford basic things but are running 2 cars. Most of the people I know on low incomes don't have 1 car. I think most people consider 2 a bit of a luxury - even if they are knackered which probably makes them quite expensive to run.

Gertiegoolash · 16/04/2011 22:49

are all working class people on benefits then OP?. And you can't afford to buy your kids a bike? really? Hmm

maypole1 · 16/04/2011 22:52

The point is that someone who is on benefits has £500 to spend on a party in the first place I wouldn't imagine most working people have that kind of cash knocking about to start with .

And weather I was their or not I wasn't expecting it to be so lavish as she is on benefits to be fair I was expecting her lo o have some CDs BBQ and some pop what awaited me and my lo was a dj, 3 tier cake with sparklers and limbo pole, bucking bronco machine type thing and catered food

Its amazing what you can afford when the goverment are paying your bills

JoanofArgos · 16/04/2011 22:53

well I am sure this bunch will be ripping it off her sharpish, so don't worry.

maypole1 · 16/04/2011 22:53

My oh is a nurse a so gets paid diddly squat

Mymymble · 16/04/2011 22:57

Then they are paying you wrong tax credits. Bash the tax office not your spendthrift relative. Not that it will make you rich or anything but take a leaf out of her book and make sure you get what you're entitiled to from the Government before the condems freeze it all. It's their mistake.

JoanofArgos · 16/04/2011 22:57

Nurses' pay is not at all bad from all I can see!
I don't get ANY tax credits as of this year, but I'm not going to go around making badly spelt judgmental posts about people on benefits trying to give their children a nice party.

maypole1 · 16/04/2011 23:02

She and all those bloody spongers need to get a god dam job and then my oh might get paid a darn site more if we went paying mr and mrs Chavez or usually miss Chavez with her 10 kids to be kept in umbro
What a waist to pay people to sit at home Nd twiddle their oh wait their usually on their backs having more kids

So glad labour is out now to the job of clearing up the mess they left

Mymymble · 16/04/2011 23:04

Oh dear.

ShirleyKnot · 16/04/2011 23:04

Confusion between the benefit scum and the working poor scum in this thread.

Frankly, if you can't run a range rover, a cleaner and a small arse wiping entourage....I ain't interested.

Also, why are all people lacking in teeth so terribly poor? Is it because the dentists charge 250 quid a pop for a filling? That seems awfully unfair. Also, I think the povs should just get a bloody job. I think it must be a bit hard, my wonderful char said that her daughter applied to some place called Arsda and she was one of hundreds. Awful shame. But what can one do?

It's hard.

Bit0fFunnyBunny · 16/04/2011 23:10

So what is the new definition of middle class here then? Being naice? Last time I looked, it was about having a managerial role or a professional qualification, but the OP seems to have promoted all the care assistants and shop assistants. I'm sure they'll be thrilled Hmm

smokinaces · 16/04/2011 23:15

yet again, someone has decided because of one person commiting benefit fraud, every person on benefits is a sponger laying on their back producing child after child.

I will say it again. If you are that jealous, jack in your jobs and live on benefits too.

Shoesytwoesy · 16/04/2011 23:18

smokinaces well said

DegreesExperiencebutnojob · 16/04/2011 23:20

YABU to criticise people on benefits.

I have done my lovely excel spreadsheet, and it shows that JSA doesnt even cover my food and bills. This doesnt include any eating out etc. Only the basic veg and meat, electricity, gas, water, basic phone.

JSA doesnt meet those costs. I am not surprised people are in so much debt, how do they manage?

monkeyjamtart · 16/04/2011 23:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mymymble · 16/04/2011 23:42

What is wrong with having an xbox??? Yes a Wii has more family friendly games, but I get the point that a Wii is just as badly looked on by posters. A second hand xbox is £80. They talk to their friends on it rather than sitting at home sadly watching (tiny) tv alone as we did as kids. They saved up for nearly 2 years to buy it themselves, one working quite antisocial days in a shop (bank holidays mothers day etc.). This thread is not just mixing up working class/benefit scroungers, it's also mixing up posh (dancing class etc.) cultural class stuff with income & being a happy family. No offence to your relative, monkey, he's grown up so prob. right not to want one.

Laquitar · 16/04/2011 23:51

I love it when OPs like this one always say 'we have FREE days out, we go to the museum. Not to the local park. To the museum. (i love it Grin) Which usually is not local so you pay fares to go. And then you have lunch at a restaurant, organic of course. And then you whine.

'despite our 'free' outing after paying our catchment area mortgage, savings, pensions, life ensurances, two cars, piano and French lessons, university pot, cleaner, etc we don't have left more than those on benefits!'

A1980 · 16/04/2011 23:56

I haven't read all of this, don't have time.

But you sounds very like like a colleauge of mine. She goes on and on and on and on about money and what she can and can't afford. She bitches her salaray and how the job is beneath her. But what is she doing about it? NOTHING. She works in the admin dept. There are plenty or admin jobs out there that would pay double what she's getting.

What do you and your husband do? Instead of bitching why not try to find a solution. Can you not find better jobs?

Bit0fFunnyBunny · 17/04/2011 00:01

Laquitar- you've got that spot-on.

goodbyemrschips · 17/04/2011 08:08

I work so am I working class?

As said before we are both on low wage.

But we have

plasma tv
wii
playstation
i pod touch [ds 9 saved up for it himself, took him 4 months]
mobile phones [payg]
I have shed loads of camera gear
one car [fairly new]
one mortgage [one year to go]
no debt
one holiday abroad a year.
money in my pocket.

I suspect if people earn more than us [a lot of people do ] they have big mortgages.

microfight · 17/04/2011 08:14

You have a home laptop or PC though right? Wink

goodbyemrschips · 17/04/2011 08:17

I agree micro, but you can buy a lappy for a couple hundred pound and I have internet broadband for only £7 a month.

But I am sure if a laptop can be saved up for a £10 bike could also be saved up for.

microfight · 17/04/2011 08:22

Exactly my point Goodbyemrschips

And maybe if the OP spent less time on mumsnet and replaced that time with a few hours part time work (possibly from home on the laptop) could give enough extra to buy a bike or two?

PonceyMcPonce · 17/04/2011 08:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Xenia · 17/04/2011 08:58

The one throwing the party on those facts seems to get a lot for doing nothing. What we need is either to pay everyone over 18 a universal benefit whether they work or not which we all get and is tax free eg £200 a week and no extra housing benefit then if they have 8 children they will just have to squash them into a very small place as those of us who aren't on benefits would have to do (I have children sharing rooms and I earn quite a lot) or else just cut the benefts back a bit so people can still eat but not have much spare.

The single person benefits are not overly generous. I think it's about £52/£65 a week (plus housing benefit). It's all the extras which can end up making the hard working working poor worse off than those who don't do a stroke. No Government has been able to solve this issue and I doubt Iain Duncan Smith's plan will be much better.

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