to get my judgey pants on and pull them up HIGH...

[NoWayNoHow]

... when I see pre-school children with rotten/rotting teeth?

So on the very rare occasions we were out to dinner, when all the other children at the table were getting diet coke as a treat and we ordered DD full sugar coke, that's what rotted her teeth??

FWIW DD would rather have water, because that's what she's used to, but when she was 3 and everyone else was getting fizzy drinks as a one off treat, we had to order full sugar drinks and were judged.

You have no idea what you are talking about LOTM and I hope you never ever have a child with complex dietary needs to deal with.

and anyone who thinks diet drinks are any better than full fat are disillusioned.

I didn't say I thought they were any better than full sugar.

What I SAID was that DD could not medically have diet and therefore as a treat she got full sugar.

Which is worse for teeth. And she had rotten teeth.

LOTM for someone who uses MN for researching your book, perhaps research is something you are not very good at?

Perhaps if you were to do some, you'd discover that most things that people judge about are not as black and white as they first appear.

hth

It's not the development that messes up prems teeth anyway. It tends to be the antibiotics which full term babies can have too.

By the way mners I think we need to be careful with mixing up the two Lady names on this thread

I also would have been very judgey about observing a child's rotting/stained teeth too until reading these posts which explain why.

The other huge issue these days is the amount of fruit children eat, highly acidic. Most people are obsessed with 5 a day in toddlers and often don't know a portion of fruit is a quarter of an apple or three strawberry's, I certainly didn't know that with my first child, she ate fruit all day long if she wanted got away with it, did the same with the 2nd and she had a filling before she'd even tasted a sweetie.

That's the thing too mama all children are different, what you might get away with with one, you won't with the next.

I have a full compliment of children of varying ages.

Although DD has her issues around her teeth/food and so on, none of the rest have any fillings - so it obviously isn't ME, but you would only know that if you knew me.

The thing that really really really gets my goat is the assumption, like LOTM made that it must be squash/sweets/crisps and so on.

I know we were massively judged for letting DD rotten teeth and all, have coke on a family dinner out with my in-laws. It was my BIL and his wife who were very vociferous that she should have diet as with the state of her teeth it would make her teeth worse to give her full sugar coke.

I was fairly full and frank in my explanation to them.

Thing is, we'd brought all her food with us, she was 3, she couldn't have the same as everyone else, she had to have special stuff, she couldn't have the chocolate profiteroles, or the lovely sausages and chicken nuggets, or the gravy with the roast - giving her the same kind of drink was the only way to make her feel a wee bit the same as the rest ?

Does that make sense?

I am 37 never had any kind of problems with my teeth medically or the cosmesis of. I have been lucky so far.. My child is the same at 12 years old. Gawd knows why..but glad of it.

Don't be too hard on the op, This thread has been good as it has exposed many reasons for poor teeth! Many people will jump to this conclusion wem thy see kids with bad teeth, it may not be right but it can happen. Like I said, this is a good thread as had informed so many of us of different reasons for poor teeth

Although when I saw a woman pour coke into a bottle for her toddler I did feel very judgey...

Sorry but I don't think coke for toddlers is ever right.

My daughter's teeth next to the front two, iykwim, came in with holes right through them. She had a wonderfully healthy diet, had only ever drank milk or water. All her teeth are weak and have coatings on then, turns out she has been born without the top layer nature normally gives.

So you are being too judgey, as it is not always neglect which does this.

No coke isn't the best idea, nor are fruit shoots or orange juice for that matter, so water it is. Or breast milk

unfortunately mama my DD couldn't even have breastmilk.

Yup. Think I'll stick to what my dentist told me. Oh, and the second dentist we went to for a second opinion. And the third, different dentist who took out DS1's bad, broken tooth.

Dolly I don't use MN for researching a book. I have two particular MNetters who contribute toward a book I am writing. Nothing to do with the threads, but thank you for taking such a vast interest in my life. I am touched.

Not breast milk?! Think I have to disagree there! Never give mine fruit shoots either - nasty drinks!

Lotm your lack of research into this subject has upset a lot of people. I can see from other threads that upsetting people doesn't bother you.

As I said earlier, at least the op apologized for her ignorance.
I wonder if you will do the same?

I will not apologise for saying that fizzy drinks etc cause tooth decay...because that is the truth, they do.

You said that a bad diet was always the cause and parents would come on here being defensive.

clearly, a bad diet is sometimes the cause
But not always

LOTM - again, your previous post

"YANBU. Ask any dentist and she/he will tell you that rotten teeth and cavities are caused by the same few things;

Eating crap
Sugary drinks
Crisps (are worse that sweets as they stick in your teeth)
Not regularly brushing
Drinking squash

Obviously you'll get the defensive parents on here claiming it's none of these things, but ask a dentist."

So what you are saying is that the specialist dentist and geneticist and consultants who told us differently, you with your experience of one child who is not even two years of age, you know better than they do.

By and large, for the majority of children with tooth decay, diet is the cause. For many families there are other causes but for MOST, the cause is sugar. Fact.

When children leave my emergency clinic and I hear their parents saying "well done, would you like to get a mcflurry" or whatever it is, my heart sinks.

Blonde you've said you feed your child coke...

yet you're getting defensive...what part of my original post is wrong?

I have to agree with LOTM that all fizzy drinks are very bad for teeth, whether diet or full fat. Diet drinks eat away at the enamel. I'm a big diet coke drinker and I was told some years ago by a dentist that I have the teeth of a 40 yo (was in my 20s) as they are so worn. Don't think diet drinks are any better ladies!

LOTM - my child, FWIW has had coke 3 or 4 times in her entire life. She actually doesn't like it and prefers water, as that is what she was used to.

I did NOT say I fed it to her every day, I said as a treat, once in a blue moon, she got full sugar coke on a family meal out.

Have you ever fed your child a sausage? Made gravy with Bisto? Given your child a chicken goujon, even home made with breadcrumbs on it? Or a sandwich? DD also couldn't have those.

The thing that is wrong is that you are pontificating on a subject that you are not knowledgeable about.

In my case, what did the damage to my DD's teeth was the acid and sugar in the specialist formula she had to have or she would have starved.

Your DD is 13 months according to your profile. My DD got coke for the first time when she was 3. When your chil reaches 12, as my DD now is, I will almost guarantee they will have drunk more coke than mine. Because they will be drinking it in McDonalds at parties, out on lunches, on the sneak when you don't know about it walking to and from school. When at someone else's house for a party.

When you've reared a child til they are an adult and when you've walked a mile in my shoes then and only then have you the right to judge me.