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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not put bells on my cats?

96 replies

Mousesmummy · 04/04/2011 18:40

Right the story goes :

Have lived in our house for 5 years, had 2 cats for the last 3 years.
Normally get on very well with our neighbours, they get children Easter eggs etc.
Neighbour man is 89, feeds the birds in his garden.
LOTS of cats in the street.
Inevitably there have been a few bird deaths!!
Their daughter asked us to put bells on our cats.
We said we had been advised not to as collars can be a strangle risk, even the 'snapping' ones.
She is not happy and has said if anything happens to her dad (whilst he is getting up to chase our cats away) she will hold me personally responsible.
I am p**d off at this comment to say the least.
So AIBU to say no?

OP posts:

Chandon · 05/04/2011 09:56

I hate cat owners.

my neighbours, with just a small patio for a garden, have two semi feral cats who shit on our lawn (where the DC run into it), kill the birds in our garden, the frogs in our pond etc etc, and they are PROUD of these cats.

I hate them. I hate the screw-everybody-else-attitude of cat owners.

prettybird · 05/04/2011 10:20

YANBU to not put a bell on.

Our two cats don't waer collars but are crap hunters (one can catch the occasional mouse or frog though). We watch the magpies in the garden teasing them as they make pathetic attempts to stalk them.

My parents' cats wear collars with bells and one of them is a prolific hunter, regularly catching rabbits.

The bells make no difference.

If your neighbour would be happy for you to supply a water pistol, then do that. It's not up to his daughter to dictate to you.

As an aisde: we too had to take one of the cats to the vet after she got her jaw stuck in it (she was trying to get it off). The bedroom looked like the Somme as she had cut her mouth trying to dslodge it. (We were trying one of those magentic cat flaps which require a collar but gave up)

ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 05/04/2011 10:27

YABU.

B52s · 05/04/2011 10:32

Ruddy cats. Tell em to get a dog.

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 05/04/2011 10:34

I don't think it matters where cats came from. But it was a vaguely interesting detour for me and the question might come up in a pub quiz on Universally Challenged so I shall not apologise

catsmother · 05/04/2011 10:42

I'm a cat owner.

Personally, I hate the attitude of ignorant bigots who declare that cat owners have a screw everyone else attitude. Not ALL of us do.

I keep a litter tray AND a clear section of earth in my garden to encourage my cats to toilet where I can clear it up. I have also spoken to both my neighbours and offered to clear up any mess they notice in their gardens .... in 7 years neither have taken me up on that offer. I also said, straight from when we moved in, that I was "happy" for them to deter cats with water, and/or I would buy other deterrents for them if they became a nuisance. Again neither neighbour has taken me up on that .... perhaps they recognise I am being responsible and don't think I like to "screw everyone else".

I can't do any more than that.

So far as collars are concerned, the instant snap ones are the only safe variety as already explained by others. Trouble is they do work effectively and are therefore liable to get lost very quickly. Average lifespan of my cats' collars is less than a week so I don't bother ..... but OP, for the sake of neighbourly relations in your case, I probably would as it's just not worth falling out with a good neighbour.

prettybird · 05/04/2011 10:46

Meant to add: our neigbours feed the birds in our shared (large) back garden, have a bird table and a bird box and the cats (no collars) still don't succeed in catching anything.

There are also hens roaming in the next garden - and their cat (with collar) is a real birder (as well as coming into our house regularly to steal our cats' food) - although he doesn't go after the hens . There are about 5 other cats that are regularly in our garden.

You can't control the cats - or birds - that go into your own, or your neighbour's - gardens. Having a bell will make no difference.

BringBackGoingForGold · 05/04/2011 11:15

Jenai, I know, you were just following up from the original statement as a matter of interest. It's the original assertion (which seems to be, unless I'm reading it wrong, that cats aren't native to the UK and therefore somehow 'belong' less than birds) that baffles me. Makes me wonder if cats should be allowed to chase/kill migratory or 'foreigner' birds that happen to land in their garden ...

lockets · 05/04/2011 14:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

prettybird · 05/04/2011 14:40

Yes.

Never happened though (see comments about how bad our cats are at catching birds).

Our gardens are also extremely large (benefit of living in a conservation area) and there is plenty of "open earth" in our garden, plus we dh still maintains a litter tray. I'be watched our cats (and neighbours cats) make use of the open earth - and then cover it up themselves

Who comes to collect the dog shit that is left on the front lawn?? Or on the pavement??

.... that is dfferent (because it is deposited during the day) from the fox shit that is left on the lawns overnight. I acknowledge that there is nothing we can do about that

Original poster

Mousesmummy · 05/04/2011 14:42

Yes I would and do if I see any.

OP posts:

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 05/04/2011 14:46

I would be willing lockets, yes.

Although the liklihood of my own cat catching anything is remote. And she chooses to spare my neighbours' gardens by crapping on our own patio, by preference as we dine.

Punkatheart · 05/04/2011 14:50

Would you do forensic CSI style tests on the poo and bodies? To be sure it is your cat?

Deterrents, people. We have two foxwatches and spray a deterrent. No foxes.

lockets · 05/04/2011 14:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lockets · 05/04/2011 14:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

catsmother · 05/04/2011 15:03

Lockets - see my post at 10.42 !

DooinMeCleanin · 05/04/2011 15:40

I'd clean up my cats poo, so long as it wasn't a runny one. If it was a runny one I would advise you to find the neighbour who keeps feeding him crap he is not allowed despite his collar tag clearly stating "Food Allergies. Do Not Feed" (I would clean his poo if I thought it was him, runny or not, but I hope he poos in the secret feeders house, on their bed [evilgrin])

My uncle's cat used to wear those snap collars. She is now collarless. It's very amusing watching him put a collar on and the cat immediately leave the house, walk backwards into the nearest bush until her collar catches and then struggle until it snaps off

Mine is too dumb to do this.

CURLYMAMMA · 05/04/2011 15:44

yabu, you could think of some compromise surely, especially if your relationship with them is usually good. Cats seem to piss people off so maybe you could meet them half way?

stealthsquiggle · 05/04/2011 15:49

My parents' cats are expert hunters, and expert collar-losers. My father feeds birds and my mother hides corpses/piles of feathers (but their population of garden birds continues to grow ) - they have tried bells, and motion-detecting things which beep when the cat pounces (those slowed them down for a while, but they worked out how to sneak without them going off, and then "lost" them anyway)

One of the cats is currently wearing a collar with his name and address and "DO NOT FEED" on it as he appears to have found a "spare" family to provide the extra meals he feels he needs.

OP - honestly - in the name of good neighbourly relations - I would put collars on the cats. I have had hunting cats and non-hunting cats (and one killing machine who hunted squirrels, rabbits, magpies, and god only knows what else), and never had a cat come to any harm from wearing a collar.

wendyfromtheyard · 05/04/2011 17:07

Its the e e e circle, the circle oooof liiife

stealthsquiggle · 05/04/2011 21:23

Oh and FWIW, I think the offer of water pistols is a great one - it would keep neighbour entertained occupied and deal, harmlessly, with all cats, not just OP's. DH has been known to lie in wait for the bullying tom-cat who was 'tailgating' DCat through the cat flap, with water pistol in hand. Cat flap locks behing bully cat, DH lets loose on cornered bully cat, then I open the door and he heads for the hills. He didn't come in again (to put it in perspective, he had previously dragged DCat backwards out of her own cat flap by her tail, permanently scarring her tail in the process)

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