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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not put bells on my cats?

96 replies

Mousesmummy · 04/04/2011 18:40

Right the story goes :

Have lived in our house for 5 years, had 2 cats for the last 3 years.
Normally get on very well with our neighbours, they get children Easter eggs etc.
Neighbour man is 89, feeds the birds in his garden.
LOTS of cats in the street.
Inevitably there have been a few bird deaths!!
Their daughter asked us to put bells on our cats.
We said we had been advised not to as collars can be a strangle risk, even the 'snapping' ones.
She is not happy and has said if anything happens to her dad (whilst he is getting up to chase our cats away) she will hold me personally responsible.
I am p**d off at this comment to say the least.
So AIBU to say no?

OP posts:
ragged · 04/04/2011 19:47

Some very clever Moggies out there :).
My cats always had collars when I was a child. Never any problems.

chickchickchicken · 04/04/2011 19:48
MoonGirl1981 · 04/04/2011 19:49

My cats (six of them) have collars. The snappy ones come off really easily so no strangulation risk. I'm not entirely sure they work. On e of mine still brings back all manner of wildlife and another one disabled her bell by chewing it so it squashed and can't jingle.

This guy enjoys feeding the birds. YOUR pets are in HIS garden. They could be utterly unreasonable and ask you to keep your pets away entirely. They're not, they want to preserve wildlife and enjoy. He sounds like a lovely guy!

If there's a way of keeping them out of his garden then do that instead. It is his property!

HeadfirstForHalos · 04/04/2011 19:50

Thank you Littlepurpleprincess Smile

ladyintheradiator · 04/04/2011 19:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mylittleponies · 04/04/2011 19:55

I think YABU and a bit unfriendly/unneighbourly tbh. your strangulation fear sounds a bit melodramatic - surely there are different types of collar, give the old fellow a break and put as bell on your cat, buy him some tiger poo (I bet he'll laugh!) and a water pistol.

lockets · 04/04/2011 19:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chickchickchicken · 04/04/2011 20:03

you get on well with your neighbour, he is 89, he buys your kids presents, he likes feeding the birds and has requested you put a bell on your cats collar. why wouldnt you??
i have various pets, neither of my neighbours has any pets. they put up with my pets, i am considerate to them. why are you even hesitating? get to the pet shop and be a considerate neighbour

bigbeagleeyes · 04/04/2011 20:07

My cats both wear flea collars (elasticated). I gave up on bells as they don't make the slightest bit of difference.
They are both prolilific bird killers, and though I don't mind them catching mice I hate them killing birds.
When my new neighbour put up a bird table I gave him permission to throw a bucket of water over them if he ever saw them in his garden (though having said that, a water pistol would be better).
Poor old man, I bet he gets as much pleasure from your birds as you do with your cats.

chickchickchicken · 04/04/2011 20:09

at 89 maybe he cant jump up and squirt them with a water pistol. even if bells dont work (and opinions on that vary) why wouldnt you do it if it would give him some peace of mind?

KaraStarbuckThrace · 04/04/2011 20:13

My mother put 2 very loud bells on her cat to try to hinder her from hunting the local small wildlife, didn't work! My cat also has a bell on and it doesn't stop him either.

No idea how they do it but the bells just don't work! Give your neighbour to invest in a small water pistol, that way he can scare your cats away without hurting them or getting up!

Undertone · 04/04/2011 20:19

I can't believe people think you are responsible for where your cat goes. I guess those replies are from people who know nothing about cats?

Why would you have a fucking cat in an urban area when you KNOW that your cat will have to pass through other people's property? It's like moving somewhere and hiring a little furry yob to parade around your neighbours' gardens shitting everywhere and mangling wildlife - then shrugging your shoulders and rolling your eyes when your neighbours are brave enough to complain.

There is no way of knowing whether your cat is behaving like a little crap-fiend out of your sight. Urban cat ownership is anti-social and passive-aggressive. It is NO good, in my opinion, to say that you cannot help your cat's natural behaviour. WHY DID YOU GET A FREAKING CAT?!

/rant

tulipgrower · 04/04/2011 20:20

All's fair in love and war. A few dead bird's here, a few dead cat's there.
I guess that would be a reasonable compromise? Grin

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 04/04/2011 20:26

As a cat owner meself I get a bit pissed off with people who take no responsibility for their mogs EG not providing a loo and smugly knowing some poor sap will be cleaning up their cats shit and now not putting collars on to please some poor old bugger who probably has very little pleasure in life.

Don't be an arse, just put a non snag collar on, it'll be fine

IlsaLund · 04/04/2011 20:27

Two of my rescue cats have had traumatic experiences with collars (before we owned the)

One had two legs trapped in a collar (front and back) and had to have extensive surgery - he was completly shaved when we had him and covered in tracks of stitches all caused by the collar.

The other was an abandonned kitten (wearing a collar) as he grew the collar became too tight and was embedded in his neck - when the CPL picked him up he was being chked by it and had to have surgery to remove it- when we had him the skin around his neck was still thickened and sore. It took 3 years for the fur to grow back, even now (5 years later) he can't bear to be stroked on the neck.

I would not put a collar on a cat.

ratspeaker · 04/04/2011 20:35

We have a cat
he has a litter tray inside
He has had many collars, including one which said "please dont feed me"

They have all been removed by some unkown person.
I've given up!

Original poster
Mousesmummy · 04/04/2011 20:42

Here we are then . . .

  1. the present buying thing is TWO way fwiw!!! We are very accommodating neighbours, always bring his bin in/out etc, get mail for them from depot, heavy shopping when he was poorly, take homemade cakes round when have been baking etc
  2. he is NOT at deaths door and has plenty in life to cheer him
  3. I OFFERED to compromise - was there something else I could get, sprays, pistol etc I am not expecting him to pay out at all but no the daughter only wanted the bells and won't consider anything else AT ALL
  4. I would gladly pick up any poo if discovered.
OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 04/04/2011 21:21

Catbib, believe it or not

GrimmaTheNome · 04/04/2011 21:24

you cannot help your cat's natural behaviour

They do in the US... its quite normal to have your cat declawed and keep it inside. Which frankly horrified me... the compromise of letting cats roam free in the day but doing whatever you can to mitigate their antisocial behaviour is surely better.

Of course the best solution is to get a small dog instead Grin

Lizcat · 04/04/2011 21:38

Personally as a vet who has struggle for years in several cases to heal wounds from collars. I would keep my cats inside all the time rather than put a collar on them. The elastic ones are the work of the devil I have cut numerous of them off cats with horrible injuries to their arm pits and then there are the cats that got hung in trees. If you have to put a collar on it must be a snap free clasp.

bubblecoral · 04/04/2011 21:52

Why are you so against putting a collar on with a bell? Get one with a clasp that snaps off and stop allowing your pet to kill local wildlife and upset your elderly neighbour.

Would you like it if he got a big feline killing dog to roam around your garden chasing and possibly killing your cats? No? Then why is it ok for you to inflict your animals on te animals in someone elses garden?

I couldn't care less what cats like to do when they go out. If people want to have them they should live somewhere that doesnt have neighbours.

Punkatheart · 04/04/2011 21:56

Cat deterrent sprayed around garden. It works if you do it regularly. Not keen on collars - have seen accidents with them. Also there is no evidence to show that they deter hunting. The bells usually fall off anyway..

EvenLessNarkyPuffin · 04/04/2011 22:00

You chose to have a cat, it's your responsibility to limit the damage it does.

StuckinTheMiddlewithYou · 04/04/2011 22:06

Cats are not meant to have collars on. They get their arms and jaws stuck on them which can result in serious injury.

bubblecoral · 04/04/2011 22:08

If cats aren't meant to wear collars, then what makes people think they are meant to live in residential areas?

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