to wonder why I can't drive?

[leftitlate]

I've spent thousands of pounds on lessons and still can't seem to grasp how to drive. Don't get me wrong I can get from A to B, but if it comes to parking or trying to reverse round a corner I'm hopeless. Have no idea which way to turn the wheel and get all flustered...

I've been going out in the car with DH which is good but today I swung so wide round a road I almost hit a stationery car.

I am 40 years old, I have a phd and have a professional job. I manage to look after the dcs and yet I can't drive. I watch programmes like the Only Way is Essex and wonder how the not very bright people on there can drive. Even the most unintelligent people can drive a car.

AIBU to wonder what the hell is wrong with me, that I cant manage this basic skill?

I passed on my 3rd attempt 7 years ago. I drove on my own only a handful of times after I passed my test and found it totally terrifying, so I just stopped. I feel so ashamed about not driving and really want to get back to it but just keep putting it off. My DCs are getting to an age now where their social life is quite busy so I've set a deadline of September to start again. Interested to hear of anyone who has tryed hypnotherapy to overcome nerves. Glad I'm not alone though :)

I'm another one who is academic and also with a DS with SN. He's diagnosed with dyspraxia (amongst other things) and I'm sure I would be if I was assessed (I think my co-ordination is actually worse than his!). My instructor is always telling me that I'm overanalysing. My car control is OK these days but I have slow processing skills so I find it really hard to judge a situation when there's a lot going on (and I'm in a city centre, so there's always a lot going on!). Then I get told off for 'undue hesitation'.

I spent a year learning about a decade ago, then stopped after I failed my test, and now taking it up again. I've failed another test and due to take another in a few months - I've had about another year's worth of lessons and I'm starting to resent the time it's taking and the cost.

Having said that, I'd still recommend getting lessons from a proper instructor than a DH or family member. It's the little things like using reference points that has helped me get to grips with manoevre.

leftitlate

I did of course pass my test on my first attempt.

This will probably get me flamed but I have never understood why everybody expects to be able to drive. Driving is a skill like any other and everybody's brains are "wired" slightly differently.

As it happens I had no trouble passing the test aged 17 and think I drive reasonably well but surprisingly my eye/brain/hand co-ordination is below average generally - possibly down to mild Aspergers. As a result I have difficulty doing even simple tasks involving screwdrivers and spanners and my wallpapering makes people think they need an eyetest!

Everybody has differing levels of ability but for some reason everybody just expects to be able to drive even though it's a very complicated activity.

This thread strikes such a chord with me too! I passed first time after about 40 lessons but I have always hated driving, I just seem to have no spatial awareness, absolutely cannot parallel park or get into a car parking space in a supermarket etc. It just scares me witless! My car will be that one you see right at the far side of the car park away from all the others. And yet other people seem to drive everywhere without even thinking about it. I've recently started driving again out of necessity after a long time of not needing to (lived in central London). But I'm still too scared to go on the motorway (or even a dual carriageway) and I really have to plan out my routes and figure out the parking if I am going anywhere out of the ordinary. Funnily enough, when I was watching The only way is Essex, I also thought "these girls are so stupid, how come they can drive and I can't!"

Unless you need a manual licence for work I agree that you should consider learning in an automatic. It will make driving much simpler - no clutch control/hill starts/gear changes etc. and then you can concentrate on other things like parking!

I only drive automatic. I can drive manual, but not legally on my won

Raspberrymug- I am the same with slow processing skills, which is the main reason I chose to take my test in an automatic.
I have no problem gearchanging, or with my clutch control, it was just the planning and doing (coming up to a roundabout for example) that just made me flap, and confuse myself. Just couldn't plan what I was doing fast enough.

I know auto restricts you, but I love it! Stop. Go. Go a bit faster with more foot. Perfect!

My dad only drives automatics now, despite being a very good driver (drove for a living) and the prices and choice are very good these days, Maybe not great if you want to drive for 'fun' (though mine is a fairly big engine, so plenty of power) but if you just want to get there, fab!

Good luck to everyone learning.

*own

I can't drive, I'm just too dyspraxic for it it seems. My muscle tone is so low I couldn't even release the handbrake!

Sorry to hear that Mintymoo.

DH has just said that sometimes for these reality T.V shows they put the cars on sort of trollies being towed along by a Range Rover or something while the subject chats witlessly at the in-car camera.

Oh how I want that to be true in the case of Kerry Katona