to think most of the other parents/carers at toddler group are...

[Champersonice]

...up their own arses?! It is a music/movement group and most parents/carers sit around and appear to be so aloof, not talking to one another. I don't get it :o( I have spoken to one or two (or three!) and the conversation just . stops . dead .

WTF? I say 'most' because obviously it isn't all but as near as! They seem to just stare at their own child, too scared to make eye contact with anyone else (although I have noticed one or two giving daggers to other children). Quite funny really but the atmosphere is rather icy on the adult side. The child side is great fun!!

Doesn't sound like a very nice group.

Try somewhere else.

It's nearly a decade since I was at a Tots group but I've made some amazing friends who are still close now. I wouldn't have gone if it wasn't friendly and welcoming. I'd go so far as to say that I got more out of it than DCs ever did.

Weird. Just go somewhere else.

In the early days I was selective and still have good friends from one or two groups. Now it is different. My DD really loves music and it took a long time to find a group that not only meets her needs but it available at the same time as us (and local). She loves it, I don't - so I will just have to grin and bear it :o)

Are you sure they are not shy? I think I sometimes come over as "aloof" because i'm horribly shy in those kind of group situations. I'm always amazed that people make friends at things like Zumba class because I am always alone in a corner looking awkward and feeling horrible.

Once I have an "in" i'm ok and can chat away to anyone but if it's a whole group of people not speaking to each other I think it kind of self-perpetuates.

Maybe try chatting with someone and you might find the ice breaks. Or have you tried that already?

Ah sorry just saw that you tried and the conversation stopped dead. I would try them all and if no luck with anyone... they obviously just don't like you

If you are talking over the music or drowning out the movement instructions then they are just trying to politely tell you to shut up.
If they are behaving like this during the "coffee and gossip" section YANBU.

I've just joined a toddler group and I'm quite surprised at how the people are. Everyone seems to know each other and go off in their own groups. I am quite shy but I've been making a massive effort to try and talk to them but most just ignore me and don't say much, then as soon as I move they start whispering to each other.

I talk to the helpers instead. I get on really well with them lol.