WWYD this is abuse but complex situation.

[JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns]

I know this is not really the correct place to post but i know aibu is the best place for heavy traffic, great advice and good opinions.

Me dp and the two dcs were made homeless 4 weeks ago since then we have stayed in a bnb.

opposite us is another family, youngish couple 27 and 25 with a son the same age as ours 3.

Now i try and keep myself to myself but im becoming increasingly distressed at how this child is treated, for starters they have no toys for him there this has upset the lady running the bnb so much she went and purchased toys for all the children staying there. He is forced to sit in front of the tv or sleep basically. but all that is pretty much nothing compared to the violence, id been there 3 days when she slapped him clean around the face full force because he was wriggling on her lap, this morning she wanted him to sit silently while she ate breakfast, he wasnt allowed any as he was naughty last night, he didnt sit still, hes 3 ffs. so she slapped him 5 times around the face after throwing him on the couch, my two started screaming and i left the room with them asking her partner to go see to his son.

this is daily, every evening he is forced to nap at around 5, she then screams at him all evening as he wont go to bed at 8, she had a pop at my two last night as they were talking in the hall and he was asleep, yet when theyre in bed at 7 hes allowed to roam and has even walked into our room shouting when theyre asleep, basically he is ignored and never being watched unless its to hurt or shout at him. It really does come accross as she doesnt like him, the dad seems terrified of her (dont blame him me and dp are) shes attacked him several times aswell. Recently she was away for a couple of days and the child was lovely with his dad and his dad is brilliant.

As well as this she has him in and out of the doctors claiming hes very ill etc, and then when he was ill with an ear infection didnt allow him to have the medication as shes overdosed him by accident before,

the problem is me and dp are terrfied of reporting her, something coming of it and her knowing its us, we have to live there, so does she. shes already been aggressive in words to my dcs, and im scared.

weve spoken to the owner and cleaner of the bnb and theyre reporting her, i think us also making a call would help this poor child, WWYD? do i stand a chance of horrible repurcusions?

sorry its so long.

this is so sad

Not complicated AT ALL - please tell me you've rung them? How are you going to feel if that little boy is seriously injured in front of you and you let it happen?

Dp is running to a garage now for phone credit, in the mean time i have emailed the NSPCC through the report abuse page on the website, as soon as i get the text i have credit i will ring nspcc and ss.

text through, back soon

This has upset me.Echoes Tesslynn's story where she was hit around the face pulled around the room by her hair.People had seen what happened and done nothing as they were scared of him etc.Sadly she died after being severly tortured burned and beaten(the bits they didnt see).Please dont be scared op.you are probaly saving a little boys life

Thanks for coming onto Mumsnet with this, cos we're all behind you! I hope you phoned the police already!

Daisy, that is just horrendous!

She may be a monster but most likely she is someone with issues who is being pushed over her limits by living in a BnB.

I am not saying that to excuse her but it might help if you know that by reporting this abuse you might be getting the mum help as well as that kid.

When I first started reading I thought it was going to be a bit of 'no toys', 'doesnt go out', 'watches tv all day' type thing.

But this isnt, she is attacking him. She is doing it infront of other people so she must be doing it when they are alone.

I know its scary but no way I would have seen that and not said something directly. Not a judgement of you but I would have, and have done in the past.
Well done for reporting. People dont, even when they see this stuff and kids die.

I know.She was only 3 poor baby.

OMG ring the police it is physical bodily harm, I would ring anybody I could there is no way I would stand by and watch a parent slap their child, not ever.

still on phone, bnb owner advised dp no police as we wont be anonymous, she has offered to contact as the mum wont dare say anything to her as she will be thrown out

contact the police that is im on phone to nspcc

Maybe the BnB owner just doesn't want the police to turn up? I know it's scary but really I'm sure the child more frightened. There are more of you than this one woman. Call the police.

I am saying Thank You jjandthebean from everyone who was abused as a child and adults "turned a blind eye"

This isnt 'sort of' abuse this is clear, violence toward a toddler.

She is lucky I am not in that b&b that is for damn sure!

Tesslynn O'Cull's story had me in tears when I read it. Its the most upsetting thing I think I have ever seen.

I know.It has really affected me.It's horrific and even the cop let her down

PLEASE report this. That poor child

Has the B&B owner seen what's going on?

If Tesslynn's story has taught me anything, then thats to never ever turn a blind eye to a childs suffering and people really can be just evil

jjandthebean, you are doing the right thing reporting this, keep strong.

I can't read about Tesslyn O'Cull - hadn't heard about her before (am in Australia) but have gleaned enough from here to know that I can't do it. I couldn't read about Baby P either - I nearly broke down when the first news reports were shown with his clothes - what were they thinking, showing his clothes on the news without warning??

I have no concept of how people can be so utterly vicious and cruel to such little children, none at all. There is something wrong in their heads. They truly are monsters and should not be allowed to have "care" of children ever again IMO.

:(

OP - hope you get a rapid response from SS and that the B&B owner does indeed call the police. She might not want them visiting because of child abuse but she sure as hell wouldn't want them to have to visit because of child murder.

Tbh I would never link her name on here.Incase suicidal people(been one myself) read it.That says alot

I think it's wrong to show pictures.Even in the newspaper you couldnt escape them.I know we need to be aware that kids are being killed but why would anyone want to look at bloody clothes

Agree with you there, DaisyDares. No need for it at all - it was just done for shock value, there was no newsworthiness in the pictures at all and it was highly distressing. I couldn't have the news on for days afterwards in case those pics or others of that poor child cropped up (Ds was a very similar age). :(

I think you have no choice but to report the mum which is sounds like you are going to do. Poor little child!

My ds was a similar age too and dd the same age as Tesslynn when the abuse started.The things that make me angry with these two stories is they both had a chance to be saved,but were pushed into the monsters hands by everyone around them

We rang and i emailed. this is the response i got;

Dear Jj

Thank you for your email which was received by the NSPCC today detailing your concerns for the child mentioned in your email.

Based on the information which you have provided, a referral to Children Services will be made to make them aware of the concerns that you have expressed.

As you have provided your identifying details, these will need to be included within the referral, however we will make Children Services aware that you do not want the family to know you have contacted the Helpline, but unfortunately we cannot guarantee that Children Services will not disclose this information to the family.

If you wish to discuss further the concerns that you have about the children, then please do not hesitate to contact us on our 24 hour Helpline 0808 800 5000 and quote the above reference number. This is a free Helpline or alternatively contact us by reply email.

If you believe that any children are at immediate risk of harm, please contact the police on 999.

Kind Regards

A. Morgan

Children?s Services Practitioner

I thought i could remain anonymous!!!!!!