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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not put DS2 into nursery

17 replies

TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2011 09:05

Until I find one which I feel is structured?

Thats it basically. I have been to view many nurseries and even had a place for him in one which he spent an hour in and trust me it was an hour too long for he and I.

80 children in each session and not a register in sight. Infact so unorganised it took them a month ( and I am deadly serious) to call me and ask
"Is DS2 ok its just we haven't seen him in nursery for a few days"

DP thinks I should have left him in that nursery or should just put him in the first available one - I obviously disagree.

So AIBU to want a bit of structure in a nursery?

OP posts:
poopnscoop · 18/03/2011 09:12

You are NOT BU!

An attendance register is a basic MUST for any childcare facility!

Shock
Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2011 09:18

Poop, seriously there were 40 children in each class. They walked into nursery hung their coats up and off they went to play. They were running, climbing, jumping, shouting, screaming etc in a hall. An adult was walking round with a clip board jotting names down but thats not a register.

Also the attitude was so lax and I didn't feel comfortable leaving my son there!.

OP posts:
NoWayNoHow · 18/03/2011 09:31

YANBU to want to keep your DS into that nursery, but tbh that sounds very unusual and all a little odd to me!

I would run as fast as possible in the opposite direction. Then I would get going on looking for another nursery - I doubt you'll have to look very hard to find somewhere better!

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2011 09:34

NoWay, I refused to take him back after the first hour.
Problem is all the decent nurseries locally are full. So am trying to find resources to teach him at home for the time being but he is only interested in playing Grin he is so so different to DS1 who was lapping up information.

OP posts:
BoysAreLikeDogs · 18/03/2011 09:42

how old is he?

preschool establishments don't do a lot of 'teaching', it's all about learning through play and child-led activities nowadays

FreudianSlippery · 18/03/2011 09:43

"So am trying to find resources to teach him at home for the time being but he is only interested in playing"

Erm, you know he IS learning right? :) By playing, even if it looks like nothing. Not that I can have a go really, I'm a total sucker for educational toys Blush but you don't need to sit down and 'teach' him.

I'm generally in favour of a less structured approach to preschool, so I was prepared to say YABU after your first sentence, BUT that level of disorganisation sounds extreme, and you shouldn't leave him there if you don't feel he is safe.

At or Playgroup they do carpet time, song time and story time, everything else is entirely free play, and it is brilliant (I've helped out a few times) - but good grief they have a register system and they know where the DCs are at all times!

Rosedee · 18/03/2011 09:43

Blimey. At ds nursery you have to ring the doorbell to be let in and they tick the name off as you walk thru the door. If they have that many ids do they have enough staff for that amount? If you're not happy then you definitely need to look for one you are happy with!

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2011 09:43

He is 3.6yrs and should have started in January.

OP posts:
FreudianSlippery · 18/03/2011 09:44

Our, not or Hmm

Desperateforthinnerthighs · 18/03/2011 09:47

YANBU - I out my son into preschool when he was 2.5 and looking back I think why???????? When I was a kid we may have done a few sessions of nursery school but i think we just started school at 4 or 5 and that was it.

He is still a baby so I really wouldn't worry about it, you need to be totally happy where you place him so take your time

FreudianSlippery · 18/03/2011 09:48

The register system at DD's setting is great. They lay out a table full of laminated cards with each child's name on. The child has to find their name and hang it on a peg board when they arrive.

Desperateforthinnerthighs · 18/03/2011 09:48

Put him in preschool that should have read!

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2011 09:51

I am more than happy for him to play, sorry that sounded so wrong. I think I have to get over the fact he is so different to DS1 who was reading and writing at this age. DS2 is still scribbling and telling me what he has written generally about fireman bloody stupid sam.

He is still very much a baby in so many ways, I think its just family pressure thats getting to me tbh.
I am happy to wait until he starts reception to get him into school if I am honest.

OP posts:
captainhook · 18/03/2011 10:15

DH and I both waited to start school until we were nearly five, back in the 70s.

As it happens DH didn't read until he was 7, I read at 3 or something ridiculous. We met at Cambridge ...

... all kids are different and whether or not he goes to nursery at 3 is not going to make any difference to future academic achievements. I definitely don't like the sound of the one you mention, so would enjoy having him at home until you find one that you all like the look of.

good luck.

StewieGriffinsMom · 18/03/2011 10:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TheLadyEvenstar · 18/03/2011 10:24

SGM, I did say similar earlier. I need to forget what DS1 was able to do iyswim?

OP posts:
Desperateforthinnerthighs · 18/03/2011 10:27

He is still very much a baby in so many ways, I think its just family pressure thats getting to me tbh.
I am happy to wait until he starts reception to get him into school if I am honest.

There's your answer honey........dont put him in then, totally your call!

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