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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Back to Work Interview

130 replies

pennyprincess · 17/03/2011 19:12

Just wondered what mumsnetters make of this. Is it the norm?

I have had a back to work interview with a senior manager after being off one day. In the interview I was asked to explain my erratic pattern of attendance and I was made to feel that my reasons for absence were doubted. And also that I had excessive absences. The whole tone of the 30 minute interview was as if I had done something wrong - like a disciplinary hearing.

I said in the meeting that all the absences were genuine and I feel you are suggesting I am lying. To which she just went on about fullfilling of my terms and conditions - no empathy or stating she was not suggesting i was lying at all.

Admittedly I have had a few absences. I returned from mat leave last march:

I was off a week in May - baby sick and then me
A 3 day days in oct,I then went in for a day but was still ill so was then off a further week (so counts as 2 absences) *Then this absence 1 day - in fact not even a full day as I went home sick after arriving at work.

I have also had a couple of medical appointments off.

But I have also worked lots of extra hours.

I know this is a lot, certainly more than i have ever had before - but with 2 babies I think you pick up things more.

Is it normal for these things to be conducted like a discipline hearing.

I am definately not a cryer - I have never cried at work in 15 years. But I left the interview and went the loo and cried and was then on the verge of tears all afternoon. Then as soon as I got in the car I burst out crying.

I actually feel like going off sick with stress I am so upset and worked up, i am actually shaking.

The interview left me incapable of productive work in the afternoon and completely demotivated.

OP posts:

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 21:51

Hatesponge you don't sound like a very good manager. Treating people in a harsh way is not equivalent to being professional. People are much more productive if they know you appreciate their efforts and are more likely to go the extra mile for you as a result. Those who don't respond to this need specific measures addressed to them. Anything else is cracking a sledgehammer with a nut, unnecessary and often counter productive.
So your lady is stoic. God help her when she develops an illness and has to be off in the future.

onlion · 17/03/2011 21:55

Its easy to be stoic in certain jobs. I sat clinics and was frontline. I also had to speak all day. I always lose my voice when I am ill. No one would thank me for sitting so close and coughing on them and not being able to offer a full service

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 21:56

Pull yourself together Trixy, you should be going in to work with an interpreter with your tonsilitis and an ice pack on your head with scarlet fever ( making sure you pass it around first ). You should also have not turned up for jury service then got arrested. Oh, well then you'd have to pay a fine to avoid prison and still get to work. Obviously.

Hatesponge · 17/03/2011 22:02

Claret, actually I'm an excellent manager and regularly receive very good feedback from my teams, who are most certainly praised and recognised frequently for good work!

As a manager unfortunately there are times when you have to deliver 'bad news' - if the company you work for has certain fixed policies, they have to be followed. I would be subject to disciplinary action if I didn't follow the prescribed sickness monitoring procedure with my reports. It's not personal - everyone in our company who goes over the trigger point has to be interviewed in the same way. I would be myself - in fact I will be if I have another occasion of absence within the next 6 months (as I have had 2 in the last 6 months).

Original poster

pennyprincess · 17/03/2011 22:03

lol clareandcheese!!!

OP posts:

commanderprimate · 17/03/2011 22:04

Haven't read the whole thread, but can I just urge you to involve your union if you are a member, or join if you aren't. I'm a union rep, and this is exactly the sort of thing I expect and want to get involved in.

Original poster

pennyprincess · 17/03/2011 22:05

As said b4 no problem with procedure - it was the tone and approach.

OP posts:

Original poster

pennyprincess · 17/03/2011 22:07

i am in union but not sure what they could do - was not called a lair just felt she thought that. she never said anything awful it really was just an unpleasant tone.

OP posts:

Lindax · 17/03/2011 22:08

My employers use the Bradford index as previously mentioned in thread. The training given to managers is :

managers do not accused anyone of faking illness but do emphasise that the individual was missed and their absence from work causes issues

verbal warning and referral to OH is compulsary at a certain level (about 120 I think)

written warnings at a certain level

termination of contract if the high level of poor attendance continued as the employee cannot fulfil their employment contract.

With OP's ~224 level it would be a return to work interview, verbal warning and referral to OH at very least.

Think this is pretty standard practise. They like to make sure these policies are applied consistantly to the entire workforce to ensure its fair (important in tribunals).

Luckily for us, if you are off because your child is sick it is not the same as you being off sick so not added to your "score".

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 22:12

I'm glad you're a good manager, Hatesponge. In that case I'm sure you deliver the talk in a constructive way that will help the person ( and therefore your company) to address any issues they may have but also to acknowledge efforts made by unfortunate people who normally work hard but fall into the absence procedures through the misfortune of being ill a few times. Yes you would be disciplined for not following the procedure, but surely how you do this is up to you.

Original poster

pennyprincess · 17/03/2011 22:13

My god - verbal warnings for being sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OP posts:

Original poster

pennyprincess · 17/03/2011 22:14

surely that cant be legal

OP posts:

StealthPolarBear · 17/03/2011 22:16

yes of course, ultimately if you are sick a lot you aren't capable of carrying out the job you are hired to do
(O am sympathetic,, but those are the facts - not saying that is te case in this case)

trixymalixy · 17/03/2011 22:18

I don't think they believed I had scarlet fever claret. I think they thought I was taking the time as sick leave because I didn't want to use holidays when the kids were Ill. FFS if I was going to lie I would come up with something a bit more believable than scarlet fever!!!

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 22:20

You see, this is something I take issue with ie applying the same policies rigidly to avoid problems with tribunals etc. I think this is the problem with a lot of things in our society now. No-one should be trusted to be professional and use their discretion any more. It makes life more stressful for the majority and is there any evidence at all that it stops the lead-swinging minority from carrying on as they did before? We all just follow rules without knowing if they are actually useful.

MadamDeathstare · 17/03/2011 22:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hairypotter · 17/03/2011 22:22

I had a reurn to work interview after a miscarriage My boss asked what I was going to do to prevent a further episode of this nature

AgentProvocateur · 17/03/2011 22:22

DH has had to sack someone last week because of her sickness record. She was regularly off on a Monday (young, singly woman) so her Bradford score was high. She'd had various warnings, but to no avail.

It seems harsh, but the absence policy was covered in the induction and is made clear to everyone. The company offers private healthcare, so when employees consistently reach a Bradford score of X (200, maybe?) the premiums that the company pays go up. They also had to get a temp to cover for this woman's absences. The company he works for is really struggling to get business at the moment - they just can't afford to accommodate a high level of absence.

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 22:24

Yeah, Trixy, they maybe thought you had a vivid imagination. Certainly beats a bad back as a possible made up illness!

StealthPolarBear · 17/03/2011 22:26

:( hairy
That's not on - did they know why you had been off sick?
I'd like to think I carry out all of my RTW interviews senstively - most are tick box exercises, some are used to discuss whether anything needs to change for the particular member of staff to enable them to work, all check that the member of staff is OK and whether work is contributing to their sickness. Ultimately if they aren't capable of carrying out their work to a satisfactory standard, whether through sickness or otherwise, they will be taken through disciplinary on the grounds of capability (unless disability or pregnancy are factors)

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 22:28

AgentProvocateur that sounds entirely reasonable. But you don't treat all your children the same on the grounds that one of them is malingering, you tackle the one with the problem. No reason why employees should be any different.

Portofino · 17/03/2011 22:29

The issue I think is lots of little absences, not to penalise you if you are seriously ill. I'm in Belgium and I am allowed one day without a doctor's note. If you have more than 3 - one day ers in a year they send the company doctor to your house! That discourages duvet days I can tell you!

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 22:29

That's really awful hairy what an insensitive, stupid thing to ask.

trixymalixy · 17/03/2011 22:30

Hairy, that's awful!!!

I thought scarlet fever was something that died out years ago, but we were diagnosed at the hospital and everything. TBH my boss was pretty good about it, I think it's just my paranoia. Like the OP before kids I was never ever off ill.

claretandcheese · 17/03/2011 22:32

StealthPolarBear, can you be my manager please?

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