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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask politely that a visiting child not to have sugar on his cereal?

360 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 14/03/2011 10:34

Occasionally I'll have one of DD2's classmates before school, as it helps with his parents' working situation.

I have 4 DCs who obviously will have to be cautious over their eating habits for life. Genes. Sad

Therefore we have only cereals that are not excessively sugary for breakfast.

This child moans about what is on offer at my house. So he then asks for augar to be added to weetabix, which I would rather not, but if DS is not in the room he can have some discreetly, as the girls understand my rationale, but DS is only 4 and I would rather not have this eating style visible to him.

So, AIBU to request politely that he doesn't add sugar when ChaoticBoy is around?

OP posts:
worraliberty · 14/03/2011 11:15

I know it's the OP's house and the OP's rules and normally I would be all for that point...especially if the child was invited round to tea or something.

But in this case, the poor kid isn't asking or choosing to be left with the OP...he has to go there due to his parent's working situation occasionally.

Therefore I think it's only fair to let him eat the sort of Weetabix he's used to...and if that involves sneaking a bit of sugar on it then so be it. No-one has to wave it in the faces of the OP's kids.

gorionine · 14/03/2011 11:15

I was just wondering, OP if your child wentto your friend for breakfast ans she added sugar on your DC cereals "because that is what we eat here" how would you like that/

Vallhala · 14/03/2011 11:19

:o gorionine

Similarly I was wondering whether the OP tells adult house-guests that they may not have sugar on their cereal because it sets (IHO) a bad example to her DC.

SudashesaliveItakeyoutoher · 14/03/2011 11:20

I have this when my grandson comes for tea - his mum really buys into this hyper activeness/bad behaviour is caused by sugary foods etc - I say its caused by him being a six year old boy and a discipline deficit. When he's here I give him what the other grandkids have (different parents - my stepsons kids) and although its not excessively sugary or salty and I do a variety of home cooking and convenience foods depending on time and mood I'm in - I do give them an Ice finger bun sometimes or some Ice Cream and Jelly for pudding for example. My daughter grills me the next day 'What did he have?' and really moans at me and says he was awful last night etc running around screaming. But sometimes she will say he was fine even when he's had the offending sugary items.

But on occasions when they have good homemade food with veg and fruit for afters she still will ring and say 'What the bloody hell did you give him - he was a nightmare last night ! Confused

I hereby rest my case

Laquitar · 14/03/2011 11:20

Oops! gorionine you are right, there is no second post. For some reason i got confused with Stripeymama and OP.

omnishambles · 14/03/2011 11:21

I think if your dc cant have something which lots of others can then its best to show them that and deal with it early rather than try and pretend the situation doesnt exist tbh.

And weetabix without sugar if you're used to it is just vile - its like eating cardboard at the best of times.

Rosedee · 14/03/2011 11:21

I can't imagine as a child demanding something other than what I was offered at a friends house. If I didn't like it then I didn't eat it.
Fwiw never had sugar on cereal and I eat wheatabix and it's fine! My nan always used to put sugar in my tea cos that's how she liked it! Took years to get her to stop doing it.

gorionine · 14/03/2011 11:22

Laqitar, I thought my MN was broken!Grin

squeakytoy · 14/03/2011 11:22

It would be nice for the Op to come back and explain her reasons for such strict food policing.

Ephiny · 14/03/2011 11:22

Yes I agree the sugar=bad behaviour link is mostly imaginary and the product of confirmation bias - people see what they expect to see. Wasn't there a study a little while ago demonstrating exactly that?

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 14/03/2011 11:23

My Brother in law puts orange juice on his weetabix/cereal

tyler80 · 14/03/2011 11:24

My mum stopped drinking sugar in her tea because she was made to feel so bad when she requested it when she first met her PIL!

Laquitar · 14/03/2011 11:26

No, my brain is broken gorionine GrinI need more coffee.
With sugar!

squeakytoy · 14/03/2011 11:27

I wonder why, in the 60's and 70's when kids were allowed all manner of sweet things, they were not all running around like out of control hyperactive monsters?? Or wobbling around due to morbid obesity?

PURPLESWAN · 14/03/2011 11:27

"Sugar on weetabix? That is absurd." err no completely normal!

If a visiting child requested cocoa pops then im afraid they would be out of luck at our house but I dont see having a small sprinkle of sugar on a weetabit will blow you up like a puffa fish and condemn you to a life of health problems.

If there are valid reasons why your child should not have sugar then it is best he learns as soon as possible that it is no the case for other people...or as soon as he is out of your sight he will be sneaking it!

ZZZenAgain · 14/03/2011 11:28

can't imagine orange juice on weetabix

belgo · 14/03/2011 11:28

because they had a chance to use up their energy, walking to school, playing outside.

Op YABU for refusing to let this child have sugar on their cereal. Seeing another child eat a small amount of sugar will not ruin your ds's eating habits for life.

AliciaFlorrick · 14/03/2011 11:29

My DC's don't have sugar on their Weetabix.

However, I make my own Weetabix when they're sitting at the table eating and I have a bit of sugar on my own because I'm a big fat hypocrite. I am of the school of thought though where moderation is best so I allow biscuits and cakes etc. The DC's are very good and will only eat the odd biscuit whereas I can scoff a whole packet without thinking about it.

NoVittyAte · 14/03/2011 11:31

Weetabix without sugar? Do you even like children?

Pagwatch · 14/03/2011 11:35

I have done sympathy for the op having had children with serious intolerances.

But I found it much easier to help my children understand what they could eat and what they couldn't, rather than make home a bubble that had little to do with the temptations of the real world.

Weetabix is pretty vile without sugar. A teaspoon of sugar is not the same as letting another child eat cocoa pops.

I would quietly let this child have sugar. Actually given that he is not my child I would give him splenda. Grin

Rosedee · 14/03/2011 11:36

Lol at Alicia and novitty!

PURPLESWAN · 14/03/2011 11:42

My only rule is I dont let them have chocolate breakfast cereal but thats partly because the thought of chocolate at breakfast time makes me feel nauseus!Grin

I really cannot imagine eating weetabix or shreded wheat without sugar MYSELF they would be disgusting...about half a teaspoon of sugar and a few rasins makes all the difference!

I veiw sweeteners as much more of a worry than a little bit of sugar!

PURPLESWAN · 14/03/2011 11:44

Rice crispies, cornflakes, malted shreddies need hardly any sugar as they are already sweet.

SmilingHappyBeaver · 14/03/2011 12:20

YABVU.

How much excercise do your DC's get OP? Perhaps the reason this other child's parents allow her to have a small amount of sugar is because she leads an otherwise healthy and active lifestyle.

I don't allow my DC's to have excessively sugary cereals (coco pops etc), if they choose weetabix then I have no issue giving them a small sprinkling of sugar if requested. Everything in moderation.

I had lots of friend when i was at school whose parents were incredibly strict about food... and it was always these kids who stuffed their faces with crisps and chocolate the minute they had any freedom and were away from their parents. You need to get a grip - you really are doing your kids no favours.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 14/03/2011 12:24

I love MN. One post from an OP and we can entertain ourselves dissecting it for hours Wink :o

Glad I'm not the only one who thinks sugarless weetabix is cruel!

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