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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think wearing shoes indoors is disgusting?

542 replies

CJ2010 · 07/03/2011 20:24

I have a 'No shoes worn in the home' rule at my own house but I have noticed that a lot of people are not fussed if peps walk into their houses with their shoes on. Why do they allow this?

Last night when I arrived at my mum's, she ordered me not to enter the living room, as she had accidentially trod dog poo through the room and was busy scrubbing the floor. All because she bizzrely wears her shoes in her home. How hard is it to take your shoes off in the hallway, once you get home?

I tried to hide my annoyance as it is her home, but I wouldn't allow DD to crawl about on the floor. The room stunk of poo and i felt sick.

AIBU?

OP posts:
NinkyNonker · 09/03/2011 13:05

I might just stop having people over, I hadn't realised everyone was so dirty. Or perhaps I'll tell them to come in through the back gate, we can ha e tea on the patio instead. I'll even give them a brolly if it rains.

Whoamireally · 09/03/2011 13:14

Here's another question - if you're a shoes-offer visiting a shoes-onner, what do you do? Shoes off, or leave them on?

Janoschi · 09/03/2011 13:17

Well, I hate being told to take my shoes off when entering someone's house, though I will if they're wet or muddy of course. I usually wear shoes at home because we live in a rambling 16th century wreck of a house and no matter how many times we've gone round with a hammer, there are always old nails and splinters poking up out of the floor. I guess the resident woodworm push them up in the night.

iggi999 · 09/03/2011 13:46

Whoamireally - I used to have a friend who when coming to visit (a shoes-on house) always took his shoes and socks off. That seemed weird and unpleasant! (for us).
I think shoes-on people have a "problem" with shoes-off (as some people have suggested) because the shoes-off people are calling us dirty!
I lived with multiple different people (lots of flat shares) and never had a shoes-off household.
Though I often swap killer-type heels for slippers, does that count?

PepsiPopcorn · 09/03/2011 14:05

I wouldn't insist they kept them on, as that would be as impolite as insisting they took them off. I'd leave my guests to decide how they felt most comfortable.

"does it bother you that people take their shoes off or do you insist that they keep them on?"

ShavingGodfreysPrivates · 09/03/2011 14:39

In others it's socially acceptable to boak up snot and phlegm in the street

Oh god yes, I was traumatised on my first visit to Bankok - even the smart business types thought nothing of hawking up huge grollies in the street.

I wouldn't be happy taking my shoes off in a house that has dogs in it (I know I'll be flamed by the dog owners for this). The reason is my friend has a beautiful dog, very well trained and (thank god) not allowed on the furniture.

I went round with my youngest one day and he took his white hoodie off and left it dangling over the arm of a chair. The hoodie slipped off and we found the dog sitting on it; having shooed him off we discovered that it now had an 'interesting' brown pattern emblazoned on it.

Now that dog goes to the loo at least twice a day, then he comes inside and sits on the carpet. I have no desire to have his mini clinkers sticking to my socks, squishing in my shoes when I leave her house.

Unless an owner takes a wet wipe to their pets bum after they have evacuated their bowels then it stands to reason that some faeces is going to be transferred to the carpet.

manfromCUK · 09/03/2011 14:40

YABU and probably have OCD

Bumblequeen · 09/03/2011 15:05

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at poster's request.

ShavingGodfreysPrivates · 09/03/2011 15:25

I know Bumble it actually made me feel a bit sick.

We threw it away (and it was a fecking expensive Ecco one too). Neither of us could face the idea of washing and wearing it again having been confronted with the evidence. I know a good wash would have removed it all but every time he wore it we would have been thinking 'dogshit hoodie'

Just think of how many invisible skidmarks would have been on the (dark coloured) carpet Shock

ShavingGodfreysPrivates · 09/03/2011 15:26

Ecko, not Ecco

If my son had got dogshit on his clothes whilst out playing I'd have binned them too. I just didn't expect it inside somebody's house!

mumsgotatum · 09/03/2011 15:57

YANBU....my background is Japanese and it is second nature to take shoes off in the house. I can't understand why people wear dirty shoes indoors, it's really unhygenic. I love in Japan that shoes are removed most places indoors.
I always ask people to take shoes off including plumber/workmen etc

diddl · 09/03/2011 16:01

"I always ask people to take shoes off including plumber/workmen etc"

They put on overshoes here.

BadBagel · 09/03/2011 16:06

So what would you 'shoes off' people do when people refuse to take their shoes off when asked?
Refuse them entrance? :)

Bumblequeen · 09/03/2011 16:10

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at poster's request.

diddl · 09/03/2011 16:15

"So what would you 'shoes off' people do when people refuse to take their shoes off when asked?"

Well, it´s the done thing here, so I don´t have that problem.

If I return to the UK, might have to invest in a pair of slippers per friend & hand them out as they arriveGrin

That or wooden floors & a downstairs toiletGrin

Bumblequeen · 09/03/2011 16:16

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 09/03/2011 16:23

'People should respect the rules of the house they visit, however silly as long as it is not unreasonable.'

What you consider reasonable they may not, and hosts should put their guests' comfort first.

Bumblequeen · 09/03/2011 16:42

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at poster's request.

LadyBiscuit · 09/03/2011 16:49

You may not ask it in a rude way but I would be pissed off Bumblequeen, particularly if I were wearing a pair of car to bar shoes which barely go outside.

You shoes off people would have been appalled by what I saw today - a couple near me at soft play put their children's shoes on the table. Where people eat Shock

Even I think that's minging :o

lesley33 · 09/03/2011 16:50

I am a shoes on person, but I am happy for people to take their shoes off in my house.

I'd actually be much happier with another posters suggestion of wearing plastic overshoes, as used in new builds. I could then keep my shoes on and you could avoid my shoes on your carpet. I would think you were OTT, but I would feel much more comfortable with this.

PepsiPopcorn · 09/03/2011 16:51

Human beings didn't evolve to live in sterile bubbles. Do people who wear shoes in the house get ill more often than people who don't? I think not.

expatinscotland · 09/03/2011 16:57

I'd have to leave then. Because I wouldn't want to associate with anyone who automatically assumed all guests' apparel, and therefore themselves, are so filty they're only good for the tradesman's entrance or be in the company of a host who valued their carpet more than people.

expatinscotland · 09/03/2011 16:58

Personally, I find carpets disgusting.

wordfactory · 09/03/2011 17:00

No I'm not keen either...wood and tiles here.

Though wooden floors in bedrooms are fecking noisy for those below.

higgle · 09/03/2011 17:01

If some idiot expectws me to take my clean shoes off and end up looking totaly unstylish and short legged in their house then they are no friend of mine! Only anal over housproud old grannies and those of a similar ilk do this!!!!

(I have very strong feelings on this subject and consider it very rude indeed for people to demand their visitors take their shoes off)