Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really disappointed with the NCT?

105 replies

3owls · 04/03/2011 16:43

Just wanted to rant a bit about our NCT class. DH and I are first time parents and really just wanted to join a group where we could make friends and get some info on the birth/baby care process.

So we paid our £200 quid to join the NCT as so many people had said its fab.

What we didn't realise that the NCT isn't a "middle of the road or heres-the-info-make-your-own-mind-up" type class...

our leader is very, very holistic in her approach. she's hot on the whole home birth, incense and hypno birthing realm of labour and delivery. which i suppose for some people is exactly what they are looking for.

I, however, have had a very complicated pregnancy and will need a lot of medication/monitoring/medical support during labour and delivery. Thus most of whats being said is completely impractical and not useful.

We tend to leave feeling frustrated and annoyed. I spoke to another Mum in the area today about all this and she was quite surprised. Apparently there was a different teacher a few years ago who did just present facts and let you get on with it. So is this experience just bad luck or do most NCT classes push this agenda?

Hmm
OP posts:
tiktok · 04/03/2011 18:16

Speak to the teacher. Let her know that what she is sharing with the class is not relevant to you. You may well need a more medicalised birth for very sound reasons, but you will still want (presumably) choice, control, options and understanding, so there is loads your teacher can offer you.

Relaxation and a holistic understanding of the way the body and the mind work together in labour and birth are just as important to you as they are to someone giving birth at home with no pain relief. You also need to understand the roles of the different HCPs in labour and birth, and what actually happens to you, and how your partner can support you.

Your teacher will almost certainly want you to have a positive and effective antenatal class experience, but she cannot read your mind. If you feel her approach is not relevant, then tell her. You are her customer!

NCT teachers are not volunteers, by the way. This is their job.

moomaa · 04/03/2011 18:17

I second every one who says to speak to the teacher and explain it isn't meeting your needs before it is too late.

Ours was not like this. In fact one lady was having a home birth and she kept having to do extra little bots for her specifically about what would be different.

IngridFletcher · 04/03/2011 18:18

Did you do agenda setting? I think you need to ring or email the teacher and let her know what you want to cover. She should be flexible.

PickleSarnie · 04/03/2011 18:21

We were really, really lucky and our teacher was lovely. She asked us at the start of the course what we wanted to learn about which we wrote on a bunch of post-it notes. At the end of the course she made sure all the notes had been covered.

Yes, there was an emphasis on a "natural birth" but she covered all sorts of pain relief etc and wasn't at all judgy about it. Formula feeding wasn't covered at all, but that's the same in the NHS classes - it's all "the feeding that dare not speak his name" apparently.

However, I definitely think that we were lucky - some others I've spoken to had dolphin music and lavender candle birth plan type proponents.

Longtalljosie · 04/03/2011 18:22

We did agenda setting, I agree with Ingrid. And my teacher was very sensitive to one of our number whose baby was breech all the way through and who looked like being a c-section. And we did c-sections as well (none of this role-playing I've heard about but a very detailed description in very positive terms and lots of laughing about how the men get all excited about wearing scrubs Grin

If it is your first / second lesson, bear with it and give the woman time. Does she know you're probably going to have a c-section?

tigitigi · 04/03/2011 18:52

I walked out of my NCT half way through, I thought they would teach you all about the baby and how to look after it. Instead there was this touchy feely woman talking about giving birth (I was really not interested in that at all, I can read books and speak with my OB about all that stuff).
The other parents were also all touch feely types, wanting to turn their birth experience into a spa Confused, they did not get my attitude of it will be awful for however long it is and then I have my baby and that is all that matters and I will need to be able to look after him.
The husbands were great and I spent most of the time with DH and the other men. As I said it all got too much and I just walked out.

Longtalljosie · 04/03/2011 19:04

The mum who had a straightforward natural birth was invited back to talk about her experience with a new group of pregnant women

Hmm - though, there could be another reason you don't get the emergency c-section mum back to talk to you. We had someone on here once who was invited back to an NCT class to talk about her c-section and the class practically ripped her limb from limb, made her feel like it was all her fault and lots of "well, my birth will be nothing like that". Poor woman.

cory · 04/03/2011 19:34

Agree with the others: talk to her. If she is a sensible woman who simply hadn't thought of this/was saving it for a later session, she will make sure to incorporate material that covers a wider range of needs in the later sessions. If not, you can ask for your money back. But give her a chance first.

pigletmania · 04/03/2011 19:49

I am sure that most NCT teachers are great and give the full information needed to prepare a new mum for birth, however I am shocked at some of the NCT teachers attitudes to asissted births, pain relief and c section. Reality here! Is it failure to give birth to an alive baby! How is it failure to hold a happy ALIVE baby in your arms Hmm

oggybags · 04/03/2011 20:30

thats such a shame, we did an nct weekend and it was totally differnt - very very balanced on everything, which given we were only offer 1 hours on nhs was so valuable
have you completed your feedback forms? i think they take the feedback v seriously so i would definately contact them and voice your concerns

samay · 04/03/2011 20:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

DitaVonCheese · 04/03/2011 20:44

I've just observed (but not attended) an NCT AN course and I thought it was excellent. Sadly I missed the first one Blush but I think they discussed in the first one what they'd like to talk about (agenda setting). It was run by a MW, so she was pro-home birth, but all MWs (in my limited experience) seem to be pro-HB and it's something that probably not many people would consider seriously unless someone explained the benefits to them so I think that's valid. She went through all the options for pain relief etc in what I thought was a non-judgemental way, though I wasn't approaching it from the POV of someone pg for the first time with no idea of what to expect, so that might have made a difference. There was loads of parentcraft stuff too, possibly more than there was about the birth.

Agree with the others, tell her what you want. At least then she has the option to change things before you leave bad feedback.

DitaVonCheese · 04/03/2011 20:44

Doh, completely forgot to say - I don't think £40 membership is cheap!

FIFIBEBE · 04/03/2011 20:48

My NCT teacher told us that labour pains were similar to period pains!! That was 16 years ago so would love to think it has changed.
NCT specialist worker hourly rate is very generous.

InspirationalBreadbin · 04/03/2011 21:18

I had NCT classes that were very balanced and covered all types of birth including c-section and induction, and all forms of pain relief. The main 'agenda' that I noticed was that both parents should make sure they understood every decision made by HCPs and were prepared to question decisions or ask for further explanations about what was being done. Which was a very positive message to put across and certainly gave me the confidence to ask questions and give my input when the time came round.

ziptoes · 04/03/2011 21:20

We did NCT and the NHS courses. Both were good. The NCT one was more intensive, and a great way to meet other newbies. We covered all sorts of stuff and even did a role play of a c-section to emphasise that if you ended up having one you shouldn't be freaked out by the huge number of people in the room. Didn't feel like there was an agenda at all. I was the only one who had no intervention, but at meet ups later everyone seemed totally happy with the way things had gone for them. The NHS one was good too, but in one hour segments you never got encouraged to meet people. I asked everyone out to the pub anyway and now two of my best baby pals are ex-NHS classmates. I'll never forget the midwife miming how the baby can sometimes go in and out at crowning - exactly what happened to me with DS, and very very funny to watch mimed!

the Breastfeeding class however was hopeless at getting over how bloody hard it can be.

I'm with the others saying you should give constructive feedback - any good teacher should value feedback.

VeronicaCake · 04/03/2011 21:44

Our NCT classes covered the full gamut of what might happen during labour and what range of pain relief is available. The tutor had had 3 emergency c-sections herself so she was pretty knowledgeable about all aspects of birth and why and when things might not go to plan. We did discuss hypno-birthing, relaxation techniques etc but only as one option among many.

So there is at least one class doing things differently.

Honestly though if you need more information about interventions, foetal monitoring, pain relief, c-sections or anything else you need to tell the tutor.

PepsiPopcorn · 04/03/2011 21:52

YANBU. I have a similar opinion of the NCT.

tiktok · 04/03/2011 23:19

tigitigi - you say "I walked out of my NCT half way through, I thought they would teach you all about the baby and how to look after it. Instead there was this touchy feely woman talking about giving birth (I was really not interested in that at all, I can read books and speak with my OB about all that stuff)."

Then you simply chose the wrong course. NCT is clear enough on its website and in all info materials that the antenatal course is focussed on pregnancy, labour and birth www.nct.org.uk/in-your-area/course-finder/courses-parents-to-be.

There is no reason on earth why anyone should sign up for a set of classes and be surprised to hear someone talking about giving birth....Hmm

clams · 05/03/2011 01:01

My nct class turned out to be pointless. The friends I made on the class turned out to be amazing. After the class, a friend gave me a tip for my classmates to make a once a week regular appointment (Tuesday lunchtimes) in our diary. It has been the making of us. Unlike the home-birth, epidural-free bullshit propaganda.

babybarrister · 05/03/2011 07:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Longtalljosie · 05/03/2011 07:58

My nct class turned out to be pointless. The friends I made on the class turned out to be amazing.

Not pointless then if you consider that one of the points of the class (from the NCT's perspective as well) is to give you a support network Hmm

Longtalljosie · 05/03/2011 07:59

Sorry, line one should have been in quotes

Georgimama · 05/03/2011 08:03

Due to hearing dozens of stories like this I saved my money and opted for the NHS ante natal classes and they were excellent - informative, honest and not in the least preachy. Probably the best part of my ante natal care, which whilst it covered my physical needs was not helped by having a different midwife for almost every appointment.

pigletmania · 05/03/2011 09:23

From reading here it seems to be a few Hmm NCT teachers ruining the reputations of NCT teachers in general.

Swipe left for the next trending thread