Trivial but vexing issue alert :
I am getting married later this summer and having a smallish wedding, max 45 people, all close friends and family. I work in a place where people are very over-interested in their colleagues' private lives which, before we were engaged, manifested itself in lots of very intrusive questions about when we were getting married. As a result I started spending as little time as possible with my work colleagues. People tend to socialise with each other a fair bit so I think this has been perceived as a bit 'off'. They also go to each other's weddings, on holiday etc. etc.
I have one genuine very good friend at work who I do want to invite. However, I work closely with another woman who I have to pretend to like but secretly absolutely cannot stand. She has assumed that she and her husband are invited to my wedding. She, my other friend and I do socialise together a bit so it is awkward and I feel that I can't just not invite her without an explanation, particularly as I have already told her to save the date in a moment of stupidity/generosity.
The reason for my dislike of this woman is partly jealousy , partly irritation at how patronising she can be ( she is roughly the same age but loves to rub in my face how much 'further along' in life she is with her children and her big house etc. etc.) and partly the knowledge that she wants to come to my wedding out of pure curiousity and sense of social entitlement, not because she genuinely likes me or my partner. She is intensely competitive and I get the feeling she would grind me into the ground professionally if she ever got the chance. Our relationship is entirely superficial but she doesn't seem to realise that I realise this and I don't think of her as a close friend.
Bear in mind I have never expressed one single iota of this dislike to her. If I don't invite her she will know and our working relationship will become more difficult. Also I'm aware this isn't particularly mature of me and lots of other people (at work) like her so I will be seen as the baddie if I freeze her out. I'm not sure I really care as I'm tired of pretending to like her. And actually I do like her husband, but not enough to cancel her awfulness out.
I just really don't want her there. She would be the only 'duty' invite as there aren't that many people coming anyway. How do I get out of this ?