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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel annoyed that dc's school won't let them have time off to do modelling?

145 replies

Lionelvinyl · 03/03/2011 09:36

I asked in advance if we could have some time off in April (2 days) and June (2 days)

I was told that it wouldn't be a problem because I had asked so far in advance/it wasn't for very long/my dc's attendance is very good and they are not behind in any way.

I got a letter today refused the holiday because of the reason for it- I didn't lie about it like most of the other parents do Hmm I was upfront and honest and I wouldn't want to put any pressure on my dc.

In the last term I know children who without any booking have had days off because they've competed in stuff and then been too tired to attend school/been preparing for a holidayHmm/fancied a day off to go shopping/picked up relatives from airports.

I know this has happened it's not just rumour some of these parents and friends of mine and my dc and they've shared this info.

If everybody else was treated the same I wouldn't be so annoyed I just feel like I've been singled out and to make matters worse someone at school has a big mouth because I got a few of the cliquey cronies asking me about modelling/agencies/if I think their children could modelHmmwhich I managed to fob off.

By the way, my dc have done modelling for a while and they've never had to take any time off as it's always been scheduled around term time, this is a one off and something they really want to do- it will be totally different to anything else they've done and I think a brilliant learning experience. (TV)

OP posts:
silverfrog · 03/03/2011 11:29

I think I recognise who the OP is, and if I am right, this is not a wind up - not the modelling, not the SN.

as an aside, I think anyone who thinks th comment of "well, if your child can do that, mine certainly can" is ok (particularly in front of the child), and particularly bearing SN in mind, which puts rather a different slant on the comment, tbh, needs to take a long hard look at themselves.

agree that a licence is needed, thoguh OP - you need to look into that.

elphaba is right - you should have signe dit all, and the ultimate responsibility is yours.

the licence system is there for a reason.

I also agree that school is not always necessarily top priority - I had time off several times as a child to do theatre/dance work - it was a fantastic experience which I do not regret for one minute.

admittedly, taking loads of time off to be an extra on set is not the best use of time, but then each job/case shoudl be judged on its own merit, really.

bupcakesandcunting · 03/03/2011 11:30

That was a wind-up?

2/10. Must try harder.

Fimbo · 03/03/2011 11:30

Is the OP going to be "BA" woman too?

donnie · 03/03/2011 11:30

yeah, that's when the penny dropped for me as well expat; 6 year old (twins?) who are Very Academically Blessed, Models and also Disabled. I was just waiting to find out what benefits the OP was on and whether she was a BNP voter as well. With maybe a little pirate shagging chucked in for good measure.

worraliberty · 03/03/2011 11:35

as an aside, I think anyone who thinks th comment of "well, if your child can do that, mine certainly can" is ok (particularly in front of the child), and particularly bearing SN in mind, which puts rather a different slant on the comment, tbh, needs to take a long hard look at themselves

What on earth is wrong with that? Confused

If it were a talent like acting, dancing, playing a musical instrument them perhaps fair enough, but what's wrong with a mother believing her child can be a model because another child is?

silverfrog · 03/03/2011 11:36

erm ,donnie, I have a 6 year old who is (in part) academically advanced, and disabled.

I have previously been approached re: her doing some modelling.

why would this not be possible?

silverfrog · 03/03/2011 11:38

I think you need ot add in the emphasis, worra - add in the sneer that (may well given the emphasis that was added when the quote was first written) have gone with that statement, and the implication (as it has been form some other posters here too) is that it is astounding that the OP's dc is a model because they ar disabled.

donnie · 03/03/2011 11:38

silverfrog; my point is the OP is a troll. Read the thread.

Original poster
Lionelvinyl · 03/03/2011 11:39

I do not have twins - dc is dear child.

I have one child but more than this child has modelled I am concerned about the licence business.

I would be outed if I explained more. Hence my not mentioning gender. In fact the more you all thought I was trolling the better AFAIC- I haven't asked for anyones account number or sort code I'm sure MN can verify that I am a long time regular but really is anyone that bothered to check Hmm.

A special hank you to Elpha. I am glad I asked, this has been very useful.

OP posts:
silverfrog · 03/03/2011 11:40

I have read the thread, donnie - and as I pointed out earlier, I think I recognise the OP.

I do not htink it is a troll effort, but of course, i could be wrong.

worraliberty · 03/03/2011 11:40

Silver did the OP mention a sneer? I don't know about anyone else, but I have no idea what the children's disabilities are and if they are even visible to other parents. Therefore, I took it to mean that if one child can be a model then so can another...and that is fairly true.

If the comment was due to the disability then of course it was plain nasty.

worraliberty · 03/03/2011 11:42

What do you mean by 'outed'? Did you feel the need to name change just for this? Confused

silverfrog · 03/03/2011 11:43

worra - I took it as read, given the emphasis added - "if your child can, then mine certainly can" reads to me as a commnet on that particular child.

given a disability was mentioned, and the general way people with disabilities are treated/commented on, I don't find it that big a leap to make.

Original poster
Lionelvinyl · 03/03/2011 11:44

SilverFrog yes you will.

And really Worral, you don't think it's disgusting that my child has been looked at agog because my child has modelled despite their disability much to the disbelief of the parent asking? I think it's awful and for the record there are children much more conventionally pretty/handsome than mine, I know that.

That is the reason I don't tell anyone. I was very foolish to ask for time off from the school- very stupid.

OP posts:
worraliberty · 03/03/2011 11:44

We all read things differently Silver I read it to mean simply they're the same age and live in the same area..go to the same school etc. But it's difficult when simply having words on a screen to go by.

loopylou6 · 03/03/2011 11:48

If you only have one child why are you making out you have two?

worraliberty · 03/03/2011 11:48

You didn't make it clear that it was about the disibility or even that your child's disibility was known to the other parents OP.

I don't understand about 'not telling anyone' for that reason and then wanting your child to model on TV? Do you not think anyone will see it?

This is one of the reasons I would never have let my children work in this industry. School can be bad enough without putting them up for extra criticism and attention, disabled or non disabled.

Original poster
Lionelvinyl · 03/03/2011 11:55

That's ok Worral, don't worry. It's easily done.

I have always denied it, I see no reason to tell people and nobody has every said "I saw your dc in XXX" In fact some people have commented and said "I saw a child just like your DC in XXX" I do think the assumption is it couldn't have been dc IYKWIM

Ok This is going to be my last post and I am going to ask MN to pull it, apologies for the imflammatory title.

I got the info I wanted, I also got a kick up the arse and a reality check and I thank you for that too.

OP posts:
silverfrog · 03/03/2011 11:55

loopy, i don't htink OP was making out she has 2 children, just using dc instead of dd or ds to make it a little more anonymous.

Lionel - hope all is going well, generally. do investigate the licence issue. if your dc is enjoying this work, and you feel it is useful, then that will be the way ahead.

GypsyMoth · 03/03/2011 12:05

You said it's a one off, but it's not

You want time in April AND June

And April is a bad month school wise with Easter and all the bank hols and royal wedding

elphabadefiesgravity · 03/03/2011 12:14

Children in long running soaps are licensed for so many performances per year. The regs have a section dealing with it and there is an agreement with regards to the BBC and certain other broadcasters.

Childrne have to either do so many hours at school or are tutored on set.

Those of you who have said that you should "just do it". You can't, taking part without a licence compromises the whole shoot/production.

it must be a wind up becasue anyone with a child who models or performs professionally must have a better knowledge of the rules than the OP seems to.

I know parents do get confused sometimes, I've filled in enough licence application forms that parents have cocked up but that level of ignorance as to how things work is simply not possible unless the agency are a bunch of cowboys.

worraliberty · 03/03/2011 12:17

I wasn't worried OP, you didn't explain properly.

elphabadefiesgravity · 03/03/2011 12:18

With regard to extras. Series that need a lot of child extras like Waterloo Road are filmed in the August summer holidays. A couple of my students had to do a bit of filming in Sept but just a few days.

WannabeNigella · 03/03/2011 12:30

YABU because I think child modelling is hideous.

They can "work" once they've finished their education.

twirlymum · 03/03/2011 12:34

wannabe why do you think it's hideous?
Look at any magazine, tv commercial or poster that depicts a child.
What do you suggest they show instead?