to think this was completely missing the point?

[Ormirian]

DH's has 2 TAs in his class. All young and pretty. I call them 'his harem' which he likes a bit too much I think . He's has been out with them all (and other staff) for birthdays and end-of-term etc) Last night I told him it was lucky I wasn't the jealous type. His reply:

"Oh don't be daft! You don't need to be jealous"
"Why's that then?" hoping for some sort of compliment....

"I'm far too old for them"

Yeah, thanks DH.

Punch him.

Right in his wrinkly gonads.

at Zigzag

Someone once called me a foul-mouthed bitch so my DH said "Numberfour is not a bitch!"

Get the dog to eat his marking.

I don't need to be jealous because no-one else would put up with his pointless wittering. He hasd rung me 4 times today to say:

1. DS1 has gone out with a friend
2. Where are the light bulb3
3. They are in MacDonalds.
4. He's spotted a fish in the pond.

Leave a piece of paper for him listing appropriate responses, and that you will be asking him the same question tomorrow so he has time to revise

If he still gets it wrong smack him round the head with a wet mackerel