AIBU to wonder if there are any supportive and kind MNers?

[verbalreasoning]

I had high hopes when I joined MN that I would find a community of helpful, supportive, kind and caring people ... Mums in other words!

So far I have found a few witty and brilliant characters but mostly every thread I've lurked/posted on has been populated by violently opinionated and judgemental people.

Am I on the wrong threads or is the anonimity of MN the root of the problem. Where are all the nice mumsy types hiding? Are they just lurking so they don't get flamed?

There are, but they are hard to spot in AIBU.

MN has gone a bit bonkers recently, following an upsurge of trolls, the beligerently minded, the rabid and the frankly simple in the wake of the EastEnders publicity and a raid from some ebay-related chat group.

Brusque and upfront: frequently. Kind: often Fluffy: no.

But AIBU is no place for anyone feeling a bit fragile, and it has affected MN since it's inception.

If the attitude bothers you avoid AIBU. If you have a question and want advice post in relationships or education rather than here.

There's support on here.

In fact there are some very brave people who have asked for support in crap times. I think of the thread about the baby girl whose circulation makes her skin go purple/black. We await medical revelations to the reasons. It's not my journey or nightmare to have - but lots of people care and need to know updates.

But there sometimes can be a pack mentality and just sometimes it over-rides the thread even after the OP has realised any error of their ways and begged for forgiveness.

I love AIBU. And it is usually is exactly what the title suggests.

Now if you like The Archers and Neighbours, well it's just lovely!

Currently the site seems to have the mystery of the disappearing threads. One minute there. Next minute gone.

For example ^

There are a lot of people on mumsnet who always try to be helpful and supportive.

That doesn't always mean that they will necessarily say what the OP wants to hear.

But more often than not, they will say what the OP needs to hear.

In any case, there are far more nice people than nasty ones. Nice doesn't mean sickly sweet here. You can be disagreeing with someone and still be a nice person.

I think most people on here are kind. but unlike many forums, there is not the same fake 'aw hugs hun'. I think this can be mistaken for not being caring.

If you 'hun' me I just might turn nasty

Don't worry. I never hun on a first thread.

The camping board seems very friendly. Give or take some cut throat competition over kit and expertise with a Cobb oven.

Seriously, there are people who have been supported through thick and thin, for years, to change thier lives for the better.

Sadly some people get short shrift. It's a bit sad when pack attack sets in.

Sometimes hugs are given. There are circumstances when it happens. Just really quick and quietly incase the Non-Hugging monsters appear from around the corner to rip us to shreds.

And LessNarkyP - why have you stuck an arrow up the bottom of my post?

Because I meant to add it to my post above to suggest the OP posts in the relevant section of MN not AIBU. Your post got inbetween.

Far be it from me to stick arrows up your bottom.

^

You could at least buy me dinner first.

I never bother with niceties like that! But I'll buy you a drink if you insist ....

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Apologies LNPuffin for my bottom getting in your way and your valid points.

I have had loads of support on here. Much more and much better than the weird huggy stuff I would get on the 'other' forum.

I sometimes start mental threads and I have always had people be really properly nice to me.

Its horrible to get flamed but rather that than hunned to death. But yes, there are some truly horrible posters on here and I wouldnt mix with them in RL.

Yes, pack attack is nasty. It is groupthink, and should be beneath MNers, but, sadly, sometimes isn't.

The buddy bench in aibu, is a lovely place, just to be relaxed and non judgey

Pop over if you ever fancy a chat

Fabbychic talks a lot of sense

Just because someone posts an OPINION it does not mean they are not nice or unsupportive! But the responses that are unnecessarily bitchy and name call are not good!

I have recently read a beautiful thread in one part of the board that needs kindness and understanding. Someone in desperate need of help has been coaxed through the past few weeks. I have been so impressed with their kindness and fortitude in helping someone with major problems at the moment.

It's there if you look. There's bad, funny, and a lot of good,

Don't know how long you've been here, OP, but you probably need to get to know us all a bit better before you are so critical.

We're people on here - individuals - and we don't just define ourselves by our maternal (or paternal) status.

There is a lot of straight talking. There's a lot of disagreement - sometimes even quite heated debate. Especially on AIBU.

But there's a massive amount of help, support, friendship and community spirit that makes this a site like no other.

I'm quite nice I often start threads because I need advice etc. and I try to post on threads in return, to also offer advice. But I don't call people Hun and I DON'T crawl around certain people who have an overinflated opinion of themselves (not you, op)!!

I've only been around a few months, but what I like about MN is that it isn't just about being a mum - and not everyone is. Many are, but being as parent is just one thing about people here. Some other forums are too much about the motherhood! There are plenty of nice people, and lots to make your laugh if you hunt around.

verbalreasoning I'm not 'mumsy' but I totally agree with you.

I joined hoping to 'meet' some fun, witty, supportive people and I have come across some.

I've only been on here about 5/6 weeks myself, but I must say there are some nasty bullies on MN - it certainly is not for the fainthearted.

There are a lot of prolific posters who will tear you off a strip without a second's thought - and foul-mouthed too - for some perceived slight.

Come and sit with me on the 'Buddy' bench and have a

Thanks I will.

If it wasn't for the caring and at the same time no nonsense MN members I'd still be stuck in a crap relationship.

Instead i have the luxury of sitting here grinning daily at my newfound happiness.

It's a wonderful and unique place this imo!