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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

can I just have a moan

22 replies

tigitigi · 19/02/2011 18:16

Ok not really an AIBU but I just wanted to vent so that I can face the family with a smile - had a hellish day - hair dresser ruined my hair with a horrible cut.

Was meant to be going away next week for a city break with a relative who will be working abroad for some time but this evening we heard that my FIL who is very ill is not expected to last.

DH and the DCs were going to go up next week while I was away but now I really should go up with them. I know it is the right thing to do but I am really disappointed and I know my relative will be as well. I also know it might be the last time I see FIL and that my DH will need me but grrrr - timing!

Ok feel a bit better now.

OP posts:
KurriKurri · 19/02/2011 18:18
Shock
squeakytoy · 19/02/2011 18:21

Cant you reschedule the break. I think you know your husband will need you the most under the circumstances, and I am sure your relative will understand why you have to cancel.

Could you maybe go out for dinner with them one evening before they go away as a compromise.

Original poster
tigitigi · 19/02/2011 18:38

relative will understand and we will do dinner - but last chance to go away before they travel. I don't mind going up at all but am so annoyed at the timing

OP posts:
PorcelinaOfTheVastOceans · 19/02/2011 18:47

another Shock face here.

onceamai · 19/02/2011 18:51

I think you're lucky to have had shocked faces and not biscuits.

Get a grip and put others first.

AttillaTheMum · 19/02/2011 18:54

OH. MY. GOODNESS

Numberfour · 19/02/2011 18:56

er................ you serious???? fuck, glad you are not in my family!

rinabean · 19/02/2011 18:59

Why can't she be upset? Obviously the OP will go with her husband and won't say any of this to him, she's just upset that the nice week she was looking forwards to has turned into a shitty one. I don't see what you're all Shocking about.

excited1 · 19/02/2011 19:01

how inconsiderate of your FIL to take ill this week eh Biscuit

Newgolddream · 19/02/2011 19:03

You sound a bit self centred, and thats the nicest thing I can think of saying. This is your DHs father and your kids grandfather you are talking about here!!!

MarioandLuigi · 19/02/2011 19:06

one more Shock

LessNarkyPuffin · 19/02/2011 19:07

Boo Hoo. She's not telling her DH or DCs that she's pissed off. And it doesn't sound like a sudden illness- it sounds like the end of a long illness. Of course it's reasonable to be disappointed.

southmum · 19/02/2011 19:07

OP I sympathise, what a shit time for your DH's dad to be seriously ill, the twat.

dawntigga · 19/02/2011 19:08

FFS some people on here are ridiculous.

The OP is going to go and see her FIL, she is understandably humanly annoyed at the timing. She came here to let off steam and be able to face her family with a glad heart.

Get over yourselves.

HidesAIBUAsIt'sDoingHerBloodPressureNoGoodTiggaxx

shinydiscoball · 19/02/2011 19:10

Bloody hell, yes YABU and I think you know fine well you are.

But I totally understand the need to vent at the shitty timing of it all - has your FIL been ill for a long time? I don't think you're self-centred, just frustrated.

crazypanda · 19/02/2011 19:18

i'm obviously not refering to everyone on this thread,but some posterso take things a bit too far,shes cheesed off because plans have had to change,she has'nt killed anyone,lighten up will you!.

d0gFace · 19/02/2011 19:42

Pants timing, try and make the most of things.

Original poster
tigitigi · 19/02/2011 19:47

ok glad most of you are not in my family

  • just to put it in perspective - I am (and always was going up to see FIL I would not have it any other way.

I am disappointed not to spend special time with relative pre afghan

relative won't mind - as someone said I just wanted to vent here so I don't vent in RL because I am upset.

Of course it is not unreasonable of FIL to be very ill now and yes it is the end of a long time - it is just such a shame that it has all come at once - I love him very much and don't want this to be the last time I see him, I also love my relative and want to see them.

Don't know why this makes me a bad person but I am obviously truly evil

OP posts:
manicbmc · 19/02/2011 19:51

I reckon some apologies are in order. Tigi just wanted a vent, is going to see fil, is upset and her relative is off to Afghanistan and she won't see them for a while.

What's selfish in feeling upset? She's doing the right thing anyway.

crazypanda · 19/02/2011 19:57

hi tigitigi,i hope everything goes ok,and that everyone is ok in your family,best wishes to you.

BlueCollie · 19/02/2011 20:00

I can understand why you would be upset as both things are sad and the timing is bad. Your friend is going to Afghan and not the safest place in the world and of course it is upsetting and a bit Grrrr! that you may not get to see them before they go. Obviously some people on here have never had to change much wanted plans and ones that are emotionally charged.
I think it is better that you vent on here and not carry that frustration up to your FIL. Ignore the people who have been rude and abusive towards you. I think they should make a place for people to just vent on here rather than have to come onto AIBU!

blackeyedsusan · 19/02/2011 20:05

yanbu to feel disppointed about missing out on seeing your relative. is he/she going far and how long is she going for.

Oh and she is putting others first because she haas cancelled her week away.

Sorry you are having a shit day.

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