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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be absolutely furious to receive a letter from the LA informing me my daughter is overweight

242 replies

fuckadoodledo · 18/02/2011 13:28

They were all weighed at school a few weeks ago,I thought for a confidential survey, but I've received a useless patronising letter informing me cheerily she is in the overweight group, with a ridiculous flyer asking "Hands up who wants healthy kids??"
My daughter is TEN, her body is in complete changeover from puberty she's solidly built but not fat, and I already spend too much time reassuring her she is NOT fat.
My DS in London's son has also been weighed, How many millions must this pointless exercise have cost? And to what purpose???
She would be absolutely devastated to be told she is officially overweight....

OP posts:
longlistofthingstodo · 18/02/2011 18:46

MillyR - it's linked to obesity as this makes you less able to respond to the insulin your body produces to reduce your blood sugar level. If you eat a lot of sugary foods then it is likely that you are also consuming a fair bit of fat so you might want to rethink that eating strategy!

And for everyone else there are studies showing that obesity is rising, that obese kids grow into fat adults and every doctor, nurse and paramedic in the country can tell you that there are more and more obese people turning up with preventable health problems. Why don't we pop over to the weight loss forum and ask how many people were overweight children?

meditrina · 18/02/2011 18:51

Link to info on causes of diabetes. Unbalanced, sugar-laden diet is a risk factor, though obesity is a more important one; the two often go together, especially over time.

TattyDevine · 18/02/2011 18:59

I haven't read all the replies, sorry, 8 pages, so I dont know if someone else has said this yet.

If you use the NHS calculator (will give link below) and change her details so she is just one year older, she is healthy.

She is being penalised for getting there early. The same height and weight would be fine if she were simply a year older.

Link here

See if you can get her to maintain her weight for a year, or keep it pretty steady for the next 2 years. She will grow into that weight, they dont like you to be an early developer, those BMI charts, try it and see. Its not about her being the wrong weight for her height, but the wrong age for that height and weight!

Tanso · 18/02/2011 19:00

any sugar we eat that is not "used" is turned into fat anyway

MillyR · 18/02/2011 19:14

Thanks Meditirina. It is a bad family habit that all the living generations of my family eat a lot of sugary food, and we aren't overweight because I suppose we eat less calories from other sources. DH also eats a lot of sugar. I feel that somehow their must be a risk, but am unfamilar with it because I don't know anyone with diabetes.

thefirstMrsDeVere · 18/02/2011 19:14

I wonder if the charts are the same type as the baby growth ones?

My children are mixed race and were all on the highest centiles without ever being fat.

Are the children's charts a bit more up to date or are they still based on a white, european body type?
The baby charts cause no end of trouble. Asian children consistantly come up as underweight, african babies as obese etc.

Same for height and head size.

mumzy · 18/02/2011 19:14

If you doubt she is overweight get the school nurse to measure her waist circumference and plot it on the same centile chart as this indicate whether she is carrying too much fat around her middle. A BMI in children of 91st-94th is overweight above that then they are obese but occasionally BMI can be skewed by large muscle mass. In these cases measuring waist circumference will give you the definitive answer of whether is overweight or not.

noonar · 18/02/2011 19:21

OP, my dd has just turned 9. i have worried about her overeating and becoming slightly over weight. i have posted recently about her.

she is sturdy and borderline chubby.

she has a BM1 of 18.2 and is on the 78 centile.

yet she is still 'a normal healthy weight' as per the weight charts.

i understand that your dd is in the 90 -something - centile...

so...i'm thinking that if my visibly sturdy dd is on a much lower centile, then your dd must be quite overweight Sad

rather than being angry at the letter, why not think about some small life style changes.

also, havent read whole thread, but i think its been said that BMI of 20 something is NOT the same in children as it is in adults.

MadamDeathstare · 18/02/2011 19:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

princessparty · 18/02/2011 19:37

i think some parents simply have lost sight of what a healthy weight kid looks like.
We have had threads like this before where parents have described their kids as having no fat at all and then you look at their profile pics.....
My 5yo DD does 5.5 hours of gymnastics a week .She has huge muscles for her age but was still only on the 22nd centile for BMI

meditrina · 18/02/2011 19:42

ThefirstMrsDeVere: the centiles I quoted above are the WHO ones designed to be suitable for the global population. They do have limitations - eg in populations which are generally getting taller/bigger, where many of the children will be in the higher centiles rather than falling in the middle. The extremities of the charts tend to be less accurate.

The key indicator here is not that her DD is 90+ for weight. It is that there is a 20 point discrepancy between her 70 centile height and her weight.

It would be just as disturbing for a 15 centile height child to be 35 for weight - she may be in light in regard to the theoretical population but she is still far too heavy for her height.

LynetteScavo · 18/02/2011 19:44

I agree, princess party...i'm fed up of other parents Shock faces when they see my child's ribs (all 3 of my DC have ribs which can be seen when they are topless). My DC are not under weight. They are how children should be, which is a rare sight these days.

My elder borthers and sisters, if children today would have been considered very thin. But not compared to their friends during the 60's /70's. My mum maintains they were always the thinnest kids in England, but the fattest kids on a French campsite.

DerangedSibyl · 18/02/2011 19:50

I agree about people losing sight of what healthy looks like.

Both my children have visible ribs. Ds1 is on the 63rd centile for weight, putting him at healthy, but slightly heavier than average. I can see the kid's spine.

ds2 seems to be slightly better covered than Ds1, but is younger. he's on the lower side of the healthy weight range, although I'm not sure where. Ribs still perfectly visible.

I was too fat as a child due to my mother's inability to accept that ribs are healthy and full is full. I'm still too fat now.

bigTillyMint · 18/02/2011 19:51

If I got a letter like this I would worry and do something (sensible) about it. I was an overweight older child - back in the day most kids were skinny, and I would have been pretty average compared to most kids now. It wasn't till I started working that I got my weight down. I do not want my kids to get overweight for health and body-image reasons.

Just been on the NHS calculator and DD is on the 49th percentile, DS on 80th.

It says both are in the healthy range, which I would agree with. Both do a lot of organised sports, and DS has a very broad frame which I think accounts for why he comes out on a higher percentile, but I do make sure I keep a close eye on him.

noonar · 18/02/2011 19:53

princess party, are you sure you havent made a mistake with your daughters BMI. 22 is really high for a child!!

bigTillyMint · 18/02/2011 19:54

DD is on about 50th percentile for height and weight, DS just below 91st for both according to the Blue book!

bigTillyMint · 18/02/2011 19:55

Princess Party - she sounds like DD(11) who does 6 hrs gym plus football and swimming!

bruffin · 18/02/2011 20:02

"princess party, are you sure you havent made a mistake with your daughters BMI. 22 is really high for a child!!"

You misread princessparty post
she said 22 centile for BMI not a BMI of 22

The letters don't tell you a BMI reading, they say what centile the BMI is on

Original poster
fuckadoodledo · 18/02/2011 20:02

can I point out, I am not fat , my DD is not fat.
I've checked, I can see her ribs ok?
She wears the correct sie clothes for her age, eats healthily and swims / plays sports regularly
I am not in denial that I have a fat kid, and as plenty of posters have pointed out the calculations are arbitary and misleading, which therefore makes the whole exercise a pointless waste of money and resources!
I have to reassure her she is not fat as she has a different body type to some of her friends, and because society dictates from a young age that only one type, tall and thin, is acceptable.

OP posts:
bigTillyMint · 18/02/2011 20:05

Well maybe they made some sort of mistake with your DD's measurements/BMI calculation?

Tanso · 18/02/2011 20:08

If only 6% of children have a higher BMI than she, it is a little difficult to imagine, but as a parent you know what is best. I guess she must have a body builder type physique. Pure muscle.

Good luck

thefirstMrsDeVere · 18/02/2011 20:18

Thank you meditrina that has made things clearer. Smile

I know this is anecdotal but I have five children and over 30 DNs/Ns. Nearly all of them (not all mine yet) have undergone a change around 8-10 when they seem to get chubby. Some of them do stay overweight but the majority come through it. It may sound a bit thick but I sort of thought it was a necessary developmenatal stage IYSWIM. OH's family are all of a tall and muscular build so I put the chubby stage down to building up of bodyweight that would turn into muscle.

You can probably tell I am not from a medical background Grin but it made sense to me.

noonar · 18/02/2011 20:20

bruffin, you are right i did misread Smile

.

ivykaty44 · 18/02/2011 20:21

Can I just point out that the link to info on causes of diabetes - this is type 2 diabetes.

Type 1 diabetes is not the same as type 2

here

There is no known preventive measure against type 1 diabetes, which causes approximately 10% of diabetes mellitus cases in North America and Europe. Most affected people are otherwise healthy and of a healthy weight when onset occurs.

defineme · 18/02/2011 20:26

My dd is the same fuckadoodle-she has just slipped back into the 'fine' bmi, but has been just into the 'overweight' bit for most of her life-even as a breastfed baby-but they just called that off the charts when she was a baby, not overweight.
As I said earlier, she was 1 lb into the overweight category when they weighed her at school and so I got the letter. She is 6 and most of her clothes are 5/6 with the odd 6- I have tried 6/7, but they hang off her.
I am not deluded. For all those who say it didn't used to be like that-she looks like every baby photo of my mum and her 7 brothers and sisters!
As long as she stays the same as she always has, eats the same healthy diet/portionsas her twin brother (who is a different build entirely and didn't warrant a letter)and runs around like a mad thing/swims/plays football/runs to school then I'll not worry.I'm not convinced by ribs=fine, but I can see them!
Statistics/charts do not fit every individual and my gp/school nurse/health visitor/friend who is a paed backed me up on this-all said I have nothing to worry about with her.

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