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Original poster

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58 replies

ledkr · 05/02/2011 20:00

Hi i have until tomorrow to get some replies so here goes.
DD is 9 days and has a cleft palate,she was only home 2 days when she was re admitted with aspiration pneumonia.She is on iv antibiotics and being tube fed and is being treated for reflux too.She is very sleepy and started to cough up lots of flem today.
I have cried so much i just cant stop,dh is devastated it is our first baby together,and ddi aged 8 is so upset she wont even visit her.Have been at hospital every minute she has been in and dh is staying tonight as i am becoming ill with it all and bleeding is heavy and im not eating or sleeping.
I have had a quick look and many of you have experienced this,i just need a bit of advice and some mn reassurance.Will she be ok?
Please help.

OP posts:
kayah · 05/02/2011 20:03

of course she will be OK
she has doctors and nurses looking after her

make sure you get enough sleep and spend some time with your dd as she is very upset and doesn't understand what's going on

all will get better very soon as little ones are fighters :)

make sure you see someone about your bleeding, you have to be strong for all of you

bubblewrapped · 05/02/2011 20:04

Awww you must be very worried,I cant offer advice, but all I can say is she is in the right place, and getting the best treatment. xxx

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 05/02/2011 20:04

Ledkr I have no experience of this but couldn't leave your post unaswered. (((hugs))).
Hopefully someone far more knowledgeable will be along in a minute.

Sassybeast · 05/02/2011 20:09

She is in the right place getting exactly the right treatment. Her daddy is with her tonight and she and your other little girl will need you to be well and stong for them tomorrow. Can you have a soak in the bath and then curl up in bed with your DD ? It's so hard when your baby is ill but try and get some sleep and get your strength up. definately get yourself checked over too if your bleeding doesn't settle.

tholeon · 05/02/2011 20:11

hi there - my ds was in hospital for 6 weeks as a little baby, I know how awful it is. You just want to swap places with them and it is so exhausting. Try to eat, try to sleep, you need to stay as strong as you can. Do you have much real life support?

I don't think MN allows hugs in general but please have one as an exception. xx

BlueFergie · 05/02/2011 20:17

Ledkr I am so sorry for the tough time you are going through. I have no experience of this but I do know your precious DD is in the best place. Take as much RL support as you can. Don't be afraid of asking. People will want to help as much as they can. I am thinking of you. Be strong xx

lalabaloo · 05/02/2011 20:19

Awww I can't really offer any advice having never been in that situation but I'm sure that she is in the best place and will be very well looked after and home soon. Have a big hug and make sure you get plenty of rest and cuddles with DD1 x

wigglesrock · 05/02/2011 20:20

Ledkr So sorry, other posters are right, she will be fine, it will take time. Please try and look after yourself, try and get something to eat, curl up with E and take care of yourself. Let dh do this for you, let him stay with D tonight and allow you a little rest and time. Thinking of all of you, keep us all updated. D will get through this, she's a fighter like mummy xx

Wook · 05/02/2011 20:20

Heart goes out to you. Your dd is in the best place, being looked after well.

Gleekfreak · 05/02/2011 20:24

Such a difficult time for you all. Take the chance to care for yourself and elder DD tonight, and trust in the hosp to care for your LO in the knowledge that daddy's there for her. On a long term basis there are several groups for cleft palate-sure the hospital will have all the details for you. My friend's DS is now 7 and doing well-hasn't always been easy through operations/speech therapy etc, but he's doing so well now and has been discharged finally to their joy! Good luck with everything.

AngryBeaver · 05/02/2011 20:29

you poor thing.you must be terribly worried.everyone is right though,she is in the right place and getting lots of help.my best friends ds ,now 12 weeks,had a similar thing at 1 week old.i think it was bacterial pneumonia.He was in hospital for about a week on a cocktail of iv antibiotics,and was very poorly. He is absoloutely fine now,I saw him today,and he was a healthy smiley little boy.
Be with your dd tonight try not to show her how worried you are.Get a hot shower a meal,and get to bed.

As everyone has said,you need to look after yourself.Everything is magnified when your exhausted.Have the hospital given you a prognosis?

my middle child,was admitted for a serious eye problem at 1 week and was on iv's etc,in for a week.It was very stressfull and incredibly upsetting to see him like that.But he was 3 today and a happy healthy boy enjoying his party.I know it's not the same,but I understand your distress.

I'm sure your lovely little baby will be on the mend very soon...lots of hugs for you darling
xx

PDR · 05/02/2011 20:30

Ledkr you poor thing - sending lots of positive thoughts to little D! You must be physically and emotionally exhausted. Please eat something though - you will feel worse if you are not eating properly.
Hope bleeding is normal heavy and not over heavy IYSWIM - I know you are a pro so you will know if something is wrong.
I am thinking of you and your family tonight. Get some rest - tomorrow is a new day x

NeedToSleepZZZ · 05/02/2011 20:45

ledkr Sending you all my strength, she will get through this but she needs you to look after yourself so you can be there with her. Please try to eat something little and often or a high calorie milkshake drink if you can stomach it.

I'm also bleeding heavily, have you passed any clots? If so then tell the mw (or which ever medical person is close to hand), I had to call mw this morning about mine and they said not to worry but to keep an eye on it so I suppose this is what they tell you.

Thinking of you and sending you a big hug x

JamieLeeCurtis · 05/02/2011 20:52

You poor thing, what a terrible worry. Sending good thoughts to you. Yes, please try to look after yourself.

My cousin was born with a cleft palate and lip nearly 40 years ago, when treatment was not what it is now. He's a burly handsome man now.

thefirstMrsDeVere · 05/02/2011 20:55

I cant comment on your DD's condition but I do know all about looking after a child in hospital.

I have to reinforce what the others are saying. You MUST sleep and you MUST eat. The stronger you are physically, the better able you will be to cope with this.
You are not letting your DD down by looking after yourself. I know guilt can make you feel like YOU have to feel ill because your child is ill. You dont, honestly x

I am sorry this is happening to you and your little family. Hold on, it will get better.

googoomama · 05/02/2011 20:56

Just sending you lots of love and hugs. My childminder's son was born with a cleft palate and is now a strong, extremely handsome boy of 17, doing a levels and enjoying life with his beautiful girlfriend. I don't know if that helps but your gorgeous baby is in the right place and you need to look after yourself too. Much love to you xxx

Tarlia · 05/02/2011 21:13

Ledkr can't offer any advice, but thinking of you all. Try and take care of yourself rest and spend time with E tonight. Little D will be fine with daddy, she is in the best place xx

porcamiseria · 05/02/2011 21:16

ah bless, what a trauma for you. Look you have just been through childbirth so you are tired/weak and the baby blues too

baby will be fine and is in best place I agree

now you try to eat, get some sleep and cuddle your family

please let us know how she is

poor you, but I really hope she recovers soon

xxxxx

sarahtigh · 05/02/2011 21:24

hi

obviously can not give specific advice as never seen your baby but a cleft palate is very treatable and will be unnoticeable to anyone except dentist and her doctor, it is not my speciality but will need treatment from a whole team in next few months and probably braces to straighten teeth later as upper arch tends to be narrow,

but you must sleep and eat and spend time with eldest child and try and explain in simple terms that baby has a small problem inside mouth but it can be fixed by the doctors , this is really really hard but try not to be upset with DD1 ; was trying to find a website for you but seems mostly for professionals but will have another look tomorrow for you

good luck but it will be ok and she will be fine

PinkiePoo · 05/02/2011 21:33

Big hugs honey....i am sending lots of get better vibes to your LO and to you. Please look after yourself though....thinking of you x x

ladytyndale · 05/02/2011 21:48

Just wanted to let you know, my friends little boy was born with a cleft palate 2yrs ago. If you saw him now you would never know, he's had a couple of operations to repair the palate, his speech is as good as any 2 yr old I know. My friend said that CLAPA were brilliant for advice and support in the early weeks.
Agree with other posters, you need to look after yourself too x

sarahtigh · 05/02/2011 22:09

www.clapa.com

Original poster
ledkr · 05/02/2011 22:13

Thanks all,i am not too worried re the cleft its more the aspiration pneumonia i am more concerned about.Just spoke to dh she is having a cuddle,i think he likes being with her as he has felt a bit helpless.She is coughing a lot but the nurses said thats good as its loosening up.Just cannot wait to see some small improvment to give us a boost.
Have consumed wine pizza and chocolate.Am off to bed with dd1 for a big sleep.Thanks all.

OP posts:
Cain · 05/02/2011 22:16

I'm torn between posting and clogging up your thread or ignoring and not offering anything.

I have no experience but will have my fingers firm;y crossed for your DD.

Best wishes.

wigglesrock · 05/02/2011 22:17

Ledkr thanks for updating us, get a good nights sleep, let us know how she's getting on tomorrow. Know everyone on Feb thread is really pulling for you all, night night.

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