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AIBU?

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Original poster

To wonder just how many Arguments have been caused by Facebook?

76 replies

yogididabooboo · 02/02/2011 22:39

I have seen so many threads on here about someone notcing something someone else has said about someone else on facebook.

I don't use it (makes me too accessible to my weirdo family) but i do wonder whether it has done more hamr than good.

it seems no one talks or phones anymore.

I recently missed news of a freinds pregnancy because she anounced it over facebook. she just assumed everyone would have seen it so didn't bother telling anyone out in the real world.
Family get togethers are all arranged over facebook.

I would go so far as to say that i reckon a fair few marriages have collapsed due to it.

I think we should do a survey.

OP posts:
Dolcegusto · 02/02/2011 22:58

Me and dh are on it. We are one of those couples who have had an argument because of something he posted.

It is great for staying in touch with people but last week I really wished I couldn't see his posts as it made me cry. Sad

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 22:58

"she sent a letter saying this, she sent him a text saying that, she told so and so this and they told me, he called him up and told him this (and then he rang everyone else and told them anyhow)

  • same old shite just in a different format.
stoppinchingthedummy · 02/02/2011 22:59

p.s your not conversing with the world ..only those on your friends list :D

Undutchable · 02/02/2011 23:00

You know what. I love it. If I do write a status update I keep it light and frivolous, I try to not discuss others etc etc.

Thanks to facebook I have got to know cousins I've not seen in 20 years, I have got close to my sister again because we know what is going on with each others lives. Yes I could pick up the phone, but I never did because it's hard to start once you've stopped. Now we are close again, I can call her on the phone and just start chatting (for various reasons I won't go into here I always felt awkward).

I have met two friends through facebook, I meet them in real life and we talk.

It's a tool, a means of communication but it isn't the communication itself. Use it or not it doesn't matter. I agree that it can be used a bit "passive aggressively" by some, i try to ignore it.

My friend made a good point earlier though, she did say that she perhaps is less close to people not on facebook and I see her point.

Booandpops · 02/02/2011 23:01

I agree for some reason people put stuff on Facebook they don't ever say in real life. Also I have one friend who posts pictures of her dinner every night!!! Who bloody gives a shit!!!! I'm on it but am pretty reserved on posts really. I just find it useful for organising night out.

maryz · 02/02/2011 23:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

difficultcow · 02/02/2011 23:03

my advice is, if you are a couple then make it a joint account, that solidifies all worries, fb is great for catching up with old friends!

Original poster
yogididabooboo · 02/02/2011 23:03

As i say, when it first started up i saw the appeal.

I think if used correctly it can be a fabulous way to stay in touch.

But i think people just seem to forget how to behave when on it.

Honestly some of the stories i have heard abotu what people have put on their facebooks Shock

I don't assume that everyone that uses it is a twat. of course not.
just that it seems to cause so much aggravation that i wonder if the pros are worth the cons?

OP posts:
BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 23:05

oh I don't share anything on FB that I don't share with my close friends off line (my 3 closest friends aren't on FB at all).

Actually I share more with my close friends (and a couple of FB friends that I chat to privately and via the FB messages) than I do on my status updates.

It's like MN really - you can post "OMG having a shit day" and people will comment.....or "absolutley bloody fantastic news" and people will comment.

Except on MN there's no guarantee everyone will be nice to you on your OMG or Woohoo posts.......on FB you choose who you want to be friends with (and even then who you want to see your status updates) so you know they'll be nice Grin

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 23:08

  • yes but we all know they do bitch behind each others backs

Leave this thread for 2 seconds.........go and look at active conversations (or somewhere like AIBU) - Just SEE how many people are bitching Grin Wink

Undutchable · 02/02/2011 23:10

I agree that people need to stop the verbal diarrhoea. I also have a friend who posts pictures of her supper, and the thing about food it that it is very hard to photograph so it looks nice! Invariably I think "yuck" even though it's probably delicious...

I always love the "xxxxx wishes some people would grow up etc etc" type comments. I shouldn't really but I do. Grin

Rindercella · 02/02/2011 23:11

And Baroque, if they're not nice, there's always the 'delete' button Wink Grin Wish we had that luxury on MN sometimes!

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 23:15

oh yes Rindercella - the wonderful "unfriend" (they've renamed it now) button - 'tis fabulous.

And the padlock - LOVED it when they introduced that, padlock along with friends lists. Sorted.

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 02/02/2011 23:23

On my facebook I have seen

Marraige breakups

Couple break ups

A row over whose fault it was ss had got involved with their family

A row over an abortion

Numerous bitch scraps

Racism

Homophobia

etc and so on, my hand seems to constantly hover over 'delete and block'

Rindercella · 02/02/2011 23:24

Someone has just said almost exactly those words on a mutual friend's wall Baroque!

Original poster
yogididabooboo · 02/02/2011 23:26

I dont understand the whole "xxx thinks yyy is a fat bastard slaggy cunt"

but xx isn't "friends" with Yy on faceboo so she can't actually see that she thinks she is a slaggy bastard cunt.

what is the point of that?

or people say "thinks people shoudl fuck off" and then lots of posts asking who they are talking about and then they say "oh i cant say on here" well then why the fuck post anything?

maybe its just me. maybe i need to be more "with it"

OP posts:
ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 02/02/2011 23:27

Oh and I fucking LOVE the cryptic messages eg

Had a really shit day, I don't want to do this anymore :(

Why ?

What's up hun ?

You ok ?

Phone me

Is it what I think it is ?

Pm me what it is...

It's ok, i'm fine, don't wanna talk about it :( i'll be alright, don't worry

AAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, well don't fucking TELL everyone then !!

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 23:27

what - my words???

Rindercella · 02/02/2011 23:27

Oh, and when I look at FB posts, I sit on my hands a lot otherwise I would get myself into an awful lot of trouble!

FB makes those bitchy little thoughts - which would normally be left unsaid (where they best belong) - out in the open. All that's needed is a glass of wine too much and poof! it's out there on the www for all to see.

GloriaSmut · 02/02/2011 23:27

I like everything undutchable has said. She pretty well sums up how I use Facebook. It doesn't have to be the medium into which one pours emotional streams of consciousness.

However, there's only one of us with a Facebook account in this house - well two if you count the terrier's shameful profile on Dogbook - since dp knows that FB would do his head in.

Janni · 02/02/2011 23:27

FB is a tool. Your use of it reflects how you are in real life. I joined so I could keep an eye on my kids, but through it I've met up (yes - face to face) with old friends with whom I'd lost contact and I've kept in touch much better with neices and nephews. I've also met up more frequently with current friends because I'm reminded of them by seeing their updates etc on FB. If you're bitchy and argumentative in real life it will be reflected in how you use FB. If you're not, it won't. Simples.

Rindercella · 02/02/2011 23:29

No! You most certainly didn't cull me! I'd have had to have been your on your friends list for that to happen Grin

And yes, it was a comment about the unfriend button.

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 23:30

ahhh ACT = if you ever see a status update like that from me it means either

a) you need to pay attention to my earlier status updates Wink

b) I've forgotten to use the padlock Grin

BaroqueAroundTheClock · 02/02/2011 23:32

ahh - that's ok then - phew - think I've grovelled to most now that needed to grovel to Grin

Can only see one comment about the unfriend button - so I'm guessing it's the one that glitters but is not gold.

BuzzLightBeer · 02/02/2011 23:33

its nothing to do with facebook. some people are just cunts, fb is just another medium for them to express their cuntishness.