to say, well actually no you dont.

[OutOutLetItAllOut]

posted a while ago about a friend who was having a gastric band.
background, she was 17 stone. through lack of exercise and eating everything that sat still. she kept saying she didnt know why she was big, but it was not her fault. went to dr, who told her to try xyz, she didnt, went back, lied, said she had done all they asked of her. they eventually gave her a gastric band. she done nothing to loose the weight properly, until they said she had to be under 16 to be allowed the op.
well she has had it.
and now she is driving me mad.
she eats constantly.
all shit.
then moans.
im trying to loose weight, the 'normal' way. and she keeps telling me she knows how hard it is.
no love you dont.

I grew up with a friend who was morbidly obese from a very young age. I always cared for him but I found it increasingly difficult to watch him gain more and more weight through an incredibly poor diet and lack of exercise. We lost touch nearly completely when I moved house but I still saw him around when I visited home and I was angry about his weight because I didn't want him to kill himself with food and it made me really sad. So I can identify with you on that.

He had massive issues around food and had a band fitted a few months ago after finally seeking help when he hit around 30 stone. He had to go through a vigorous screening process, counselling and was required to lose weight before the surgery to prove his commitment and to reduce the risks involved. He obeyed it all and has lost 10 stone so far. I'm immensely pleased for him and I so hope it's what he needs to turn his life around.

It sounds to me like our friend really wasn't assessed properly and her issues around food remain.

Actually there is an element of truth to the posts about people underreporting food intake, whether intentionally or not. There is also the hawthorne effect to be taken into account.

I understand that, but to label everyone who fills out a dost sheet a liar is offensive. Especially to the people who are truly trying to change their lives and have a complete understanding of the severity of having major surgery for weight loss purposes.

Damned iPhone. That should be diet sheet.

That should be diet sheet

Gah double post, sorry am having issues.

OP... Perhaps talk about other things with your friend than 'diets' and 'eating'?

I think gastric bands have their place but people who have them have to come to terms with the fact that they couldn't manage to control their eating through willpower. Your friend is doing herself no favours, her procedure hasn't taught her a thing and her doctor will know. She's kidding herself.

Do your own thing regarding your weight and stop comparing yourself to your friend.

"and fuck off to anyone who can't be arsed to lose weight themselves so that public money has to be spent on them rather than disabled chidlren, elder care etc etc and so on" - yeah right. BEcause thats how the NHS works - only people who are totally undeserving of their illness/pain/condition get treated and fat people are snatching teh care from under the noses of disabled children.

So the NHS doesn't treat anyone with sporting injuries, or smokers with bronchitis or lung cancer or people who sprained their ankles by being careless or people in car crashes when they were the one driving and caused the accident, or people who cut themselves whilst making the soup or drunks.

OP your friends is a poor candidate for a gasric band and if the hosptial psychologist had been a bit more switched on or your frineds a bit less determined to fool them, she would probably not have had the surgery.

My brother was turned down for bariatric surgery despite being morbidly obese becasue the psychologist was not convinced that he would be compliant with the requirements of having it. This would be a waste of time and money for the NHS and painful for him.

Bariatric surgery is the most difficult way out of an obesity spiral not the easiest but you can;t avoid those who are convinced by the media that its an easy fix and are determined to get one come what may.

As your friend has demonstrated, as with any other "addiction" you need to have got to a place where you accept your isseus and want to deal with them constructively.

gastric bands can reduce hunger crashing waves but it doesn't in about 15% of people.

Kewcumber... is that to me? If so, I take issue with your post as you've completely misunderstood. The NHS is there for everybody right enough... bearing in mind that cancer drugs can't be funded for many people because of costs, do you think it's reasonable that somebody takes money from the pot when they have no sense of personal responsibility and commitment to at least try to help themselves? Well I don't.

And that smoker's argument is old. It's the sort of thing that's dragged out whenever there's a debate about NHS funding and deserving causes.

The pot is not infinite and choices are going to start being taken in terms of where the funding goes.

No I think it was probably to appletrees, wasn't it?

What a complete waste of NHS resources!

This kind of thing really pisses me off.

STOP overeating. BOTH of you. Get off your backside and exercise, why don't you?

No to appletrees. Yes resources are scarce and criteria are getting tougher - I very much doubt whether she would have got funding today as many PCTs are putting a BMI of 50 as a requirement.

No I don't think she should have had surgery (as I said) I was replying to Appletrees who says anyone who is fat can "fuck off".

"Get off your backside and exercise, why don't you?" useful comment, bet the OP hasn't considered that (despite referring to it in her posts). All that fat - it clogs the brain you know.

err wendihouse - usually helps if you read more than one post by the OP - she has done this: "STOP overeating. Get off your backside and exercise, why don't you?" Both parts of it.

This "I'm so fat, no matter what I eat" rubbish is just that, a load of old codswallop. It's like people who smoke whining on and on, when they get the health side effects from a 30 a day habit.

I used to work at a well known hospital that pioneered heart/lung swaps. The domino surgery as it was. The consultant was tough with those patients who came in grossly overweight and unwilling to acknowledge that a big smoking habit (which they simply couldn't give up) was not really the way to go. He'd say, you must lose weight and get help to quit the smoking, otherwise you are wasting my time and jeopardising any treatment you receive.

Same thing.

Unless these people are on treatment which prohibits weight loss, there's no reason why, if you eat less and take some gentle exercise, you will EVENTUALLY lose the weight. Simples.l

Kewcumber - don't take it so personally......it's my opinion and I'm entitled to it.

thumdawitch.....thanks for tip. I only read first post and clicked on "reply".

And yes, LyingWitch.....it's an old old story, that smoking health related conditions take up so many NHS resources but you know what? THEY DO.

Same for alcohol. Same for obesity. Same for drug use.

At some point, don't we have to take a bit of responsibility for WHAT WE DO TO OUR OWN BODIES?!

I should add, I'm a good 10lbs overweight; I probably drink too much wine, especially when I'm stressed and my bit of exercise goes out the window at this time of year but......I don't bleat about it. I KNOW what I have to do. If I do it, that's my lookout.

deste - I bet you'll find your sister eats more than you think - she probably eats in secret.
And Deste, I agree with thumbwitch

For those who say she eats more than she says, She stays with us for 6 days over Christmas and is so lazy never attempts to cook anything for herself except a bowl of cereal in the morning. She just waits to be given her meals. At home she has a maid who cooks for her at night. She does not eat sweets or junk. And to anyone who says it was a waste of NHS money, she paid for it herself. What I do know is that it must be too much for her body to lose weight. Someone on here privately emailed me to tell me about gastric bands and it can take a few attempts to get it right.

wendihouse... I know they do. I don't smoke but used to and am lucky enough (so far) to have suffered no ill effects from smoking.

The point I was making is that smoking is a little different in terms of generating revenue as if the government would hand the taxes over to the NHS, they could probably fund an awful lot more than just smoking. Alcohol and foods don't raise that kind of revenue.

I just think people should take responsibility for themselves instead of being so helpless and passive so I actually agree with your posts.

I think you are getting unfair abuse here - you are Obviously frustrated at your friend's shit poor effort to do anything about her weight - if I were you I would tell her outright that the reason she is not losing weight is because she eats too much and too much shit and that she should either change her ways and get some counselling too or stop maKing excuses.

Did she have it on the nhs? People
Like her make me fume, taxpayers paying for her to stuff her face

Aghhhh

"Kewcumber - don't take it so personally......it's my opinion and I'm entitled to it."

What makes you think I'm taking anything you said personally? You have your opinion (perfectly entitled to - as you quite rightly pointed out) and I commented on it - its called a discussion. Just because you have an opinion doesn't require me to treat it with any respect.

I absolutely agree with all posts (including yours) talking about taking responsibility and not whining about things (all sorts of things nor just weight) and that this particular person sounds like she shouldn't have had surgery at all (never minded funded by the NHS).

I don't agree with using the Op's friend situation as an excuse to swear about all fat people fucking off and I don't think (as I said) that your comment was at all helpful if only for the sole reason that it doesn;t work. Most overweight people who acknowledge they have a problem have no problme losing weight. They are probably more successful at losing weight than the vast majority of people who have a minor weight problem. They usually don't (or can't) address the reason they are overweight and weight loss surgery can be one tool which is proven to be effective for people who have got to a certain point and saves a lot of resources down the line managing diabetes and complications, heart disease and sleep apnoea and the associated side effects. I'm sure there are plenty of people who have had bariatric surgery who have succesfully lost weight and gone on to lead happy and healthy lives and contribute to th ecare of their family and pay taxes back to the country who are very grateful that you aren't making the decisions on who gets bariatric surgery (ie no-one) but someone with a little more understanding of the area.

wendihouse - are you aware that you can highlight all the posts made by the OP in any thread? It helps enormously to see what's going on very quickly - if you are not aware that you can do this, go into Customize at the top of the page and somewhere down the list is an option to highlight all posts by OP. It's brilliant (unless the beggar namechanges halfway through a thread - that's annoying )

To be honest gastric band surgery pisses me off massively-
I get fed up of 'ooh no diets work for me ' then magically lose 10 stone with a band.
all it does is limit your food intake, so you eat less.
It's just beyond my comprehension how people can't just limit their food??
Waste of money