to leave the children alone in the kitchen until they've eaten their 'disgusting' food.

[NoseyNooNoo]

DD is 4, DS is 2. DS won't eat much at the moment. Often doesn't even taste the food. DD will eat one section of the food but entirely ignore other bit.

Tonight DS looked at his cottage pie and veg and said 'eugh!' and ate none of it. DD ate the cottage pie after she had declared the smell 'disgusting' but not eat veg despite it being the veg she likes. I've left them to it and said they can get down when they've finished it.

I realised I've had a tantrum but I'm sick of rushing around getting everything sorted for them just for them to find fault or be difficult. The food thing is really symbolic of DD finding fault (the 'disgusting' comment) and DS just saying 'no' to everything.

And breathe...

Put some ketchup on it..

NBU AT ALL>

I did the same last night.

We have a 15 fork full rule in our house, and that kinda clears the majority of the plate.

Make them food they want to eat, ask them when they get home what they want to eat as opposed to dishing up what YOU want them to eat.

At least then they get to eat.

There, there, tomorrow is another day, and you can all start again.

Give them a big cuddle and a bedtime story and tomorrow you can use all the helpful suggestions that mn is just about to provide.

I did this with DS1 the other night. I'm sick to death of school telling me how he eats everything in sight, yet he complains about virtually every meal I cook.

YANBU

Nothing wrong with what you have done, my only minor alteration would be to tell them they can get down when they've had enough. They wont starve themselves and you can easily let food become a battleground.

If they don't eat their dinner, there's nothing else though.

Make them food they want to eat, ask them when they get home what they want to eat as opposed to dishing up what YOU want them to eat

seriously????????

I dont run a restaurant. In this house, you eat what you are given. Or you go hungry.

Fabby - brilliant idea. Always great to let a 2 year old and 4 year old plan the menu -

[bhmm]

Fabby, mine would live on chicken nuggets if i geve them what they wanted!

They have what we are having, and they eat 15 fork fulls, no arguments.
Its the rule and its accepted in our house.

broke kisses bicepts and bench crunches 5ooLb weights

Fabby -dangerous precedent (not really sure you meant that though (smile)).

You run the risk of the children dictating a diet of crap rather than healthy stuff.

Definitely in the 'they eat what they are given or go hungry' camp. Took me long enough to suss that one out but was amazing how little trouble dinner time was once they knew nothing more than a banana would be offered. Never expected them to clear their plates though.

YABU

Also... I have banned the word 'disgusting' in relation to food. Especially if I have cooked it . (They might be right about school food, but don't let them know I said so!)

maybe give DD 2 choices for dinner?

i sympathise, DS is still a sod when it comes to fussy eating grrrrr!

I agree with Fabby.

Bubble you might not be running a restaurant but "you eat what you are given. Or you go hungry." sounds a bit military canteenish.

Somewhere in the middle is probably best.

i do expct a clear plate though have been known to tailor meal choices to whatever was going down well at the time.

and weigh bowls to ensure i wasn't asking too much of them.

so YANBU. that's what my Mum did and we all were good little eaters.

some people will tell you this causes obesity - a notion that is quite groundless.

Having an adult tantrum would involve flinging the food dramatically in the bin, not leaving them to it so I think you were very restrained, not unreasonable at all. I find ignoring children when they're eating stops some of the drama so leaving the room would certainly be what I might do in that situation.

Ok, so perhaps best if I give them the food and it's up to them when they have finished but if they haven't finished the main course they don't get dessert?

They do have a varied menu and everything I cook has been heartily wolfed down previously so I know it not just that they don't like my cooking.

Dont even go there on asking 'what they want to eat'. Even at age 10 and 8 our DSs can be infuriatingly picky.

Get this.

DS2 wil not eat really nice ham in a sandwich, yet when he goes to a party he will eat a really plastic nasty ham sandwich. DS1 will not eat a sandwich if he can see any of the meat/cheese sticking out or if it has any butter on. How hard can a sandwich be to eat FGS!

Dont even start me on doing a Sunday lunch for them. Thank goodness I allow myslef to indulge in a glass of wine on a weekend.

I'm tempted to just let them eat rubbish.

In fact I feel stressed just typing this.

I have demanded the dds eat food on their plate only a couple of times and both times did no good whatsoever.

As a general rule, I never make a deal about food and I certainly never demand that they eat something they have just told me they don't like.

It's a much more relaxing way of going about things.

Great idea Fabby, and when they wont eat anything except a selection of 2 or 3 meals, what will you suggest the OP does then?

the DC get what they are given in this house and are expected to eat atleast some of it. I dont do faddy and wont tolerate it!

As a result I now how a 20, 13 and 9 year old who will eat absolutely anything! My 6 year old is going through the same phase the others went through of being picky, but she either eats what she is given or goes without. She is coming out of it now, just at my 5 year old is going into itm which will be fun. He is starting to refuse to touch things he has always loved, so I am not feeding him things I know he doesnt like.

Its nothing to do with food, but a control and independence thing. Once they realise that they wont win then the soon give up!

dd1 hasn't had butter on a sandwich for years. I don't mind at all, no skin off my nose. She just doesn't like the texture and taste of butter in a sandwich.

Bubble you might not be running a restaurant but "you eat what you are given. Or you go hungry." sounds a bit military canteenish.

I would disagree. I am the mother, I provide nutritious nice meals that I budget for. I also plan ahead and cook from scratch, so I do not necessarily have the ingredients to whip up a request at an hours notice.

I cant afford to throw food away. I dont want fussy faddy children.

My mother never gave us a choice, we ate what she made. There were some meals that we would groan about, but we still ate it. There were some meals we would have as favourites and enjoy more than others.

Young children need a balanced healthy diet,and to be introduced to as much variety as possible.

I wouldn't use dessert as another bartering tool, though. I'd offer fruit or yoghurt only as a dessert.

Keep offering the healthy meal options but reduce the quantities if they might be a bit overwhelming.

Don't discuss eating over the table at all -stick to other subjects so you are talking around the food not about it. Children soon learn that food is a great way to control parents.

Most children, when you sit down and think about it, eat more than just 2 or 3 meals.