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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To report two infant age children walking to school alone

566 replies

ThePosieParker · 25/01/2011 10:36

... to the head of the school.

This morning I saw two siblings (I assume) walking to school alone, the oldest looked about yr2 at the most and the youngest a reception child. I wanted to phone the school as there could be a number of reasons these children are walking alone, not all sinister but in my mind none good enough,. This is Bristol, a busy city, not the place to allow children to cross roads and negotiate traffic and people at the age of 6 or below, surely.

OP posts:

mitziw · 25/01/2011 11:10

you phoned ss?

Vallhala · 25/01/2011 11:14

I don't blame you Posie, I'd have reported it too, as a "just in case" measure. I'd far rather raise a possible concern and look a fool than not do so and regret it later.

mitziw · 25/01/2011 11:15

i thought you were going to tell the school? how can you tell ss if you dont know who they are?

katiestar · 25/01/2011 11:22

No wonder SWs can't get on with protecting kids who need it, when they have numpties like the op cluttering up the system .
You don't know if they were alone of there was an adult woth them, but at a distance.You don't know their ages , you don't know their names.And if they are walking alone, what are they going to do about it.It's not illegal?

mitziw · 25/01/2011 11:25

my son is 9 but is very tall for his age (looks a few yrs older) i have seen children in secondary school at least a foot shorter than him. you really have to be careful trying to guess their ages.

JockTamsonsBairns · 25/01/2011 11:28

I can't believe there are people who actually ring social services to report other people's perfectly legal parenting choices simply on the basis that they don't tally up with their own

It's one thing raising a possible concern with the HT, quite another to involve SS.

FFS

waitwhat · 25/01/2011 11:31

You should have rang the school not ss that abit overboard

My son has walked himself to school since he was 7 hes small too.

mumto2andnomore · 25/01/2011 11:35

I would have phoned the school, they probably would have known who the children were from your description.They may even be keeping an eye on things already but this would be more evidence. Very sad that some people cant be bothered to make sure their children get safely to school when they are so young.

bibbitybobbityhat · 25/01/2011 11:38

You were concerned about two small children on their own Posie - I think you were right to make the call.

PadmeHum · 25/01/2011 11:38

I am told that it's perfectly normal in other European countries (Switzerland springs to mind) for very young children to walk to and from school.

A bit that the OP called SS...

GloriaSmut · 25/01/2011 11:39

I recall when the very young looking but Year 6 ds1 and Y4 brother started walking to their primary school alone and were picked up in a car by the neurotically protective mother of a school friend. She was horrified that I was allowing them to walk the perfectly safe route to school so insisted on driving them. This allegedly "safer" journey starting by her routine habit of driving the wrong way up a one-way street because "it saved time".

While I respect anyone's concern for children walking to school alone I think it is wildly over the top to inform SS. No wonder they are struggling with impossible caseloads. Surely, if interference was absolutely necessary it would have been enough to notify their school?

waitwhat · 25/01/2011 11:40

mumto2andnomore how snide of you.. have good mum medal, you clearly worthy

i could say your poor children are oppressed always being molly coddled and not allowed independence but i try not to judge or be snid3e.

bibbitybobbityhat · 25/01/2011 11:40

Oh, I didn't see that you had called social services. I thought you were going to call the school?

waitwhat · 25/01/2011 11:40

snide even..

taintedpaint · 25/01/2011 11:43

Phoning SS was a step too far (way too far IMO) but phoning the school would've been a good idea.

goingforit · 25/01/2011 11:43

It's not sad at all. It's teaching independence. I would imagine a parent has carefully plotted route, where and how to cross, etc.

My son took himself to school 5 miles away aged 10 involving a bus and a walk. He looked about 6. On the way he met a friend also aged 10 but 6 inches taller. I heard parents comments about that little boy etc. The little boy was actually 5 months older than the boy 6 inches taller. He had been trained and advised on where to cross etc and to ring phone 3 times from mobile upon arrival.

I would have been livid if someone had phoned ss. It's perfectly legal to walk along a pavement. I am astounded

goingforit · 25/01/2011 11:43

It's not sad at all. It's teaching independence. I would imagine a parent has carefully plotted route, where and how to cross, etc.

I would have been livid if someone had phoned ss. It's perfectly legal to walk along a pavement. I am astounded

FreudianSlippery · 25/01/2011 11:45

I think SS was rather OTT but phoning the school wouldn't do any harm. Probably wouldn't come to anything, as you don't know who they are, but there is a small chance they would know who you meant - say, if there was a child they were concerned about already? Maybe they have other reasons to think a child is not being looked after properly?

Worth a try IMO, even though it's probably nothing.

clevercloggs · 25/01/2011 11:45

or its called laziness on the part of the parent who cant be arsed to get out of bed, or get dressed in order to get the children safely to school

BuzzLightBeer · 25/01/2011 11:46

ffs, laziness? Do bugger off.

Seville · 25/01/2011 11:47

I plan to let my two walk to school when DS1 is in Y3, and DS2 is in Y2. They're not stupid and we will practice plenty of times. I'm at you ringing the SS.

straightoutofthebottomdrawer · 25/01/2011 11:48

The thing is that right now there are parents out there who are already drunk at half eleven in the morning (just to pick one example). Alcoholics exist and some of them are parents. People like that can make stupid decisions and send small children off to walk to school by themselves when they shouldn't. So just because two children might have been sent off by a together, rational parent making a perfect sensible choice, doesn't mean that has to be what's happened.

If I saw a child walking to school alone who seemed surprisingly young I'm not sure I'd be happy just shrugging it off and assuming that represented a sane parent's rational decision, knowing that there's at least a chance it might not.

The more surprisingly young the child for the road conditions in that area, the greater the risk that there's something iffy about the decision and maybe there's a parent with a problem doing something stupid. It's got to be worth at least raising a question to see if someone can look into it.

amberleaf · 25/01/2011 11:50

Calling SS is over the top.

Do you know the family? as im wondering what exactly you could have told SS? how would they know which 2 children waled to school alone that day without a name or address?

DiscoDaisy · 25/01/2011 11:52

There's a sister and brother who go to the same junior school as my DC. They are in year 5 and 3 but if you looked at them you would think they were reception and yr1.
One of my friends has a boy in year 7 who looks as though he should be in reception. If the school the 2 children were walking to on their own was a primary is it possible that they are older than they look?

Original poster

ThePosieParker · 25/01/2011 11:52

Called an agency affiliated to SS, school didn't pick up and I didn't want to leave it.

OP posts:

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