Does Mumsnet represent motherhood at all?

[DontKnowWhat]

I'm not a troll but an exceptionally confused eighteen year old girl after reading mumsnet.

I'm aware that parenting is very demanding and hard-work even at the best of times, but can somebody at least tell me that they enjoy it? Reading this website has put me off the idea reproducing permanently if all I've got to look forward to is parental competition, a crap husband, a huge mortgage, school catchment areas, celibacy and the only sense of self-worth I'll have is whether I breastfed, co-slept and cloth nappied my children until three and forced them to only eat Waitrose food, dress in Boden and play with wooden toys.

But this forum (maybe for the benefit of society) is making me think about getting myself permanently sterilised and whacking my head with a frying pan until I turn asexual. I don't want to only be proud of my parenting methods but more by my offspring or myself as an individual. Nor do I want to use my husband solely as a sperm and money donor and some guy I constantly whinge about.

Yeah, I have the common sense to realise that this is mainly because people complain about their problems instead of enthusing about their lives. And I know maybe many mumsnetters will not meet any or some of these criteria and have a lot more genuine stuff to complain about. But this place feels really ranty and snobby about everything - I'm not just talking about this section btw.

Please can somebody at least tell me that they enjoy parenting? Or that they don't portray this ridiculous ghastly stereotype I've seemed to get into my head?

Don't, you will upset Scottishmummy. Apparently we are breaking one of the cardinal rules of the internet by daring to question the integrity/identity of a poster.

I think you are spot on.

If you are not an elderly male journo, o Genuine Teenager then shall I really put the shits up you by telling you that this is what passes for fun for a 40 something single parent??

Dewsbury doesn't seem so bad now does it?

Please go out and give your mother time to shag her OH some time to herself. She worries that you are home on a Sat night and is thinking of gently suggesting therapy.

op is neither here nor there,the resultant hysteria is telling

man????????????
Journalist???????????????

oh gawd betty pass the smelling salts.some bird online just twigged maybe folk lie online. maybe its a journalist.or a teenager

scottishm, it is only my concerns for your imminent demise from sky high blood pressure that is keeping me from my bed.

there is no hysteria here. No sudden dreadful realisation that - gasp! - maybe not is all that it seems.

But what would you have us do? play along with it? ignore it? This is the best fun I've had all week.

But I shall sleep sound, knowing that you police the internetz for us with your calm voice of reason and logic.

if unsure about strangers intentions.dont post online.its all a leap of faith.you decide individually what you can tolerate

Who has said they can't tolerate anything??? Its sweet that you get so worked up, but completely unnecessary.

Good night.

but you see my bp is in normative range.i dont you get het up about what strangers yak aboot

I love having my daughter and I love kids so much I work in a nursery looking after everyone elses as well. If I won the lottery I would have at least 6. being a mum is the best thing ever.

In RL no one is competitive about things (not in my area anyway). Its not that common to see people breastfeed, us cloth nappies etc. I have never even heard of Boden until I came on here and I think its something you can only buy if you live in London as shops dont sell it here.

I also suspect you're a troll, but if not, well done for being so articulate at your age. :)

Being a parent is hard because it's so damn-awful boring at times. You have to listen to this little person say, "And then, on Scooby Doo, Shaggy said 'ZOINKS!', right Mama? Right?! Right? He said 'ZOINKS!' and it was so funny! 'Member that, Mama? 'Member that? It was so funny!" about fifty times and hour, and you have to get up and care for them when you're hungover ill and want to lie down and die, and no matter how organized you think you are you're always scrambling for matching socks in the morning, and no matter how consistant you are they will have an embarassing public strop (or several)at some point...but you love them. God, you love them more than you could possibly imagine, and they're so funny and incredibly dear that it will take your breath away.

And FWIW, I complain about my husband every now and then, but he's the sun, moon, and stars to me, he really is. I adore him.

As far as the competition goes, just don't give a shit. That's all. Do what works for yoou and your famiy, and you'll be just fine.

An hour, and family. I really should proof read.

OP, I've not yet read the whole thread but just wanted to add:

• firstly, welcome!
• we are mostly Brits on MN. We as a nation are known whingers, so try to remember that when you read MN. Being a parent is both the most amazing and the most stressful thing you can do, IMO, but the good stuff FAR outweighs the bad. We humans (and especially those of the British variety) just tend to moan more than praise, because we enjoy it.
• if I were to read a site frequented mostly by teens I'd come away with the terrifying idea that teen life really is like watching Skins and would race my family to the hills like Rumpelstiltskin in an attempt to protect my tots from the horrors to come. No website really gives a fair and balanced report of life, we just write what comes into our heads and miss out the less dramatic bits.
• if you're going to use a frying pan make sure it's a cheap one, preferably a toy one from the ELC so you don't do your good brain too much damage

I suspect this is a troll butI think that all teenagers should read it, it shows motherhood as it really is and any girl who 'wants a baby to love me' will find out that there is far more to it than a lovely smiley baby in cute clothes!
It has sleepless nights, cleaning up vomit at 2am, 2 yr olds throwing themselves on the floor in the supermarket, refusing to eat, sibling squabbling, etc etc.
I love it and have super DH and DCs and there are far more positives than negatives.
You can be a mother without any of the stereotypes mentioned. I like Waitrose but shop across the range, I have never worn Boden, don't think people's choices about co sleeping etc are very important in the grand scheme of things, wooden toys are nice but so is plastic and I can appreciate that school catchment areas are high on the conversation in London but probably not elsewhere.
Having read your list a second time I'm sure that you are a troll and over 18!

I quite enjoyed reading these posts! Perhaps mumsnet should publish a book of key off-putting facts to give to teen girls?!

God.. add pictures of what you get left with following a vaginal birth and teenage pregnancy rates would vanish overnight.

Don't know what, I haven't read the whole thread so this might have been said,

But generally in life you don't need advice for the good bits, because they are, well, good. We do come on and have a laugh and lots of bunfights banter and debates, but where the practical side of parenting is concerned, one doesn't often come of to start a thread if LO is eating well, sleeping well and generally behaving OK.
They are nice threads but don't cause the heart ache or need 'support'.

So yes, the side of parenting/relationships is often the 'negative side.

It is hard and demanding and challenging and changes your life beyond recognition, in a lot of cases, but it doesn't reflect whether or not we enjoy parenting, just reaching out in the tough bits IYSWIM.

If you stay on MN for a long time, and sort through the bits that aren't for you, you will get to the heart and soul of a support network that's tendrils reach into the lives of so many families and where it matters, mostly for the good.

I have both supported and been supported, aside from the laughter, insomnia relief, and all the practical emotional and general stuff and am proud to be on here.

As for Motherhood.... it is a roller-coaster ride sometime you wanna scream to get off and sometimes it takes your breathe away on so many levels, but yeah.... it's worth it.
Hang around for the threads about the cute/funny/thoughtful things our little 'cherubs' can say.. it'll make you giggle.

Just like I did when my gorgeous DD (8), trying to cheer me up said tenderly ''you like your hair messy don't you Mummy'' and then '' don't worry Mummy, there's no-one as fat as you''

Oh,, and I don't give a jot who or what you are re troll/journalist, I just felt like offering my opinion

I love being a parent. I have three DC, DD(7), DS1(4) and DS2 (9 months), I also have a wonderful husband. Its all made much easier as both DH and I are relatively well paid, such that I can have a nanny to look after the DC when I work (3 days a week).

My children are wonderful (agree with all hector said) and I learn from them every day. Yes it is a huge responsbility and very time consuming but I love being a mum and I was never really particularly maternal when I was younger. DH is a wonderful husband and a great dad.

In terms of the nappy/co-sleeping thing - eg to their own, we use disposables, breastfed until 6 months, and never co-slept.

The advice I'd give you is to focus on getting a career which is flexible enough to work part-time BUT well paid enough that you will be able to afford good childcare.

Just read your latest post.

I have several female friends who are part time GPs. All seem to have well paid husbands as well. Everyone has minor problems in life, maybe your child is struggling in school, or your DH is having another quarter-life crisis, or as you say you don't get a place at your first choice of school etc, but you work through it and mostly its good. Life just isn't always perfect.

But somethings aren't worth stressing over - eg you make the decision about nappies and thats what works for you. Same with feeding.

Clearly you've made a good career choice, just make a good choice of partner and you have the makings of a great life.

Yes ..it is..and we all enjoy parenting in our own special way ..

I love hester's post and agree wholeheartedly. People don't generally come on a forum to talk about their lovely day, it's a place to let off steam so reading posts in a place like this (AIBU especially) isn't going to give the whole picture.

Once you become a mother you get the bad bits with the good bits, there is no opting out when the going gets tough! It is also for life, any thoughts that it finishes at 18yrs should be banished.
I would recommend it, but I think that all teenagers should get a realistic picture because once you start there is no changing your mind. Also the baby stage is over very quickly and they soon have minds of their own! (this may differ enormously from you).
I had never thought of it before, but perhaps people should read MN before they start.

Woah you are obviously the product of a really expensive boarding school as no 18 year old girl I know (and I have one myself) would talk like that. Or you are fibbing.