To hope that mumsnet would offer the same support

[SpikesPet]

to other, less well known or "popular" members, if they were experiencing a similar sort of crisis and asked for help?

Well I imagine that some of the focus is based on the fact that DC visited Rivens house and the story appeared in a newspaper so its hardly unreasonable to expect that the level of support is somewhat elevated.

Why another thread on this, why not just post on one of the existing ones on this subject?

I am sure that it would. I think that the thread you are referring to will open up a much larger debate regarding respite for all who need it. Shame it took such a horrible reason to do it.
I think ABU to suggest (for that's what it sounds like to me) that it wouldn't.

Here you go, this is the first time I've done this .

What are you all going on about? Please fill me in. Haven't been on MN for a couple of days, haven't read any papers, and the OP thread doesn't give me enough info to ahve a clue. I'm watching The Wright Stuff & host has literally just said "THE HORRIBLE MUMS FROM MUMSNET". ???????????????? What's going on????????????

spikes pet I don't know how long you have been around but mnetters DO response to other posters in difficulties.

I can remember a cry for help some years ago when mn swung into action worked out where the lady was arranged for care for her children after school and got her to a hospital (Iirc she needed medical attention) .

When mn works it works VERY VERY well.

Riven's story for me is important, I have read her posts over and over again, about her life how she copes and what she goes through on a daily basis, Her original post was a totally bleak one and my heart went out to her.. I wanted to help in any way I could (as appears to have been the case for thousands of others..)

There are innumerable instances of MNers helping other MNers in crisis so I can only assume you're new or you're just a bit mean-spirited.

And if you want to be more well known, post more. It takes years of dedication to become well-known on such a big board

What a thoroughly snidey OP. Have a quiet word with yourself Spikespet - that's a nasty streak running through you there.

If we help the 'well known' and 'popular' members, I would hope that it also raises the focus for other people to receive the help they need.

The reason lesser known posters get less response is that we just don't know if they are genuine.

I have seen loads of threads where people have offered help to newer posters and been taken for a ride, both financially and emotionally.

Equally I have seen lots of good come out of cries for help from genuine posters.

The difference is not that Riven is 'popular and outgoing' it's that we know she is real. People are willing to invest their time to help any poster if we know they are truely genuine.

I think she's popular because she's on here quite a lot as it's her lifeline in a very difficult existence.
A lot of people also know how tough her life is, yet she maintains her dignity/sense of humour. That also makes her popular.

I am so pleased she got the help that was needed- have just been speaking with onother mother at my kids school and she is desperate for help as well. As a mother my heart goes out to her and her DD.

But you are right spikespet we should have a better attitude to helping others and there is so much need. Only that in my experience some of the people that post here is just attention seeking or trolls....its hard to know smt.

Also, the poster who had the problem with the baby being given to her last weekend received loads of help.
I'd never heard of her before.

Its only on the news etc because DC visited her last year when she challenged him on the web chat.

Any other poster saying the same thing would get the same amount of support I'm sure but just not the national news headlines.

Of course longstanding members are going to attract a lot of attention. But I seriously, absolutely believe that if any MNer posted regarding a similar crisis, it would roll, too.

YABU.

The media are going to be all over MN today like a rash. Can we stop sniping at each other, it just gives them fuel to put us down.

People obviously feel more empathy and offer more help to those that they know or are familiar with. But thats just human nature, and a valuable survival instinct! It has nothing to do with MN. Add to thst the fact that many on here have been taken in my trolls. I am not one of the head girl popular types but I still feel MN is fabulously supportive given that it is an online forum made up of mainly strngers.

Lots of people have received help on here before - practical, emotional, financial etc etc.

The trouble is that people then join maybe specifically to take advantage, or to troll so new posters are sadly now viewed with a bit of suspicion sometimes.

For example for the Xmas Appeal, I think you have to have been a member for 6 months/a year to be nominated - as people actually joined up just before Xmas in the hope of freebies.

I don't understand why everyone is so worried about the media? Surely the only bad publicity is no publicity and all that? I don't care if they "put us down" because we argue...it would be wierd if everyone agreed with each other all the time.

Because, inevitably, we will be branded hysterical bitchy women.

Could someone explain briefly what this is about? Have found the thread in chat about someone who needed help with respite care (is that the one?) but don't understand why it's on the Wright Stuff and why we were referred to as horrible mums?

Sorry I knows it's annoying to explain stuff but it's 67 pages long!