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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

....to be feeling unfairly got at?

58 replies

breastbadger · 17/01/2011 20:55

At the weekend, I put a ink to this blog as my fb status. I'm a local peer supporter and do feel strongly about the shocking media coverage that this has generated, but have honesty NEVER made any judgey / derogatory / ff-bashing comments online or in rl.

I'm also a Neonatal nurse, so part of my job is gently supporting women in any feeding choice they make.

So......I was a bit surprised to get this email from a male friend. This is it, nothing edited out. Apparently a letter in The Times.

AIBU for being a bit pissed off? Was my link really that offensive? Is friend having a dig or not?

Women are rarely given sensible tips on establishing breastfeeding during ante-natal classes

Sir, In an ideal world every baby would breastfeed and reap the enormous benefits from the process. But it?s not that simple. When people take up polarised positions, all they are doing is to make it more difficult for mothers (report, Jan 15).
Women are rarely given sensible tips on establishing breastfeeding during ante-natal classes. Instead of simple guidance, they are sold an illusion of warm bonding with the baby while breastfeeding.
As a paediatrician, I constantly see this struggle mothers go through. When you are feeling vulnerable, any head-shaking is seen as terrible criticism. This is when an unbiased view is helpful, not shrill badgering.
Dr Shyla Jehangir
Cockermouth, Cumbria

OP posts:
MsKLo · 17/01/2011 20:58

cant see the link?

Piggyleroux · 17/01/2011 20:59

Link not working

DuelingFanjo · 17/01/2011 20:59

YANBU.

is it possible they got the wrong end of the stick RE the blog?

Original poster
breastbadger · 17/01/2011 20:59

Must also add, I sort of agree with the letter, its more the intent behind sending it to me that's got me stumped. Thanks.

OP posts:
MsKLo · 17/01/2011 21:01

I often put bf support links on my fb and if people dont like it they can ignore. You anbu to be pissed off - you can't seem to be proud and positive about bf as it seems that it is seen by many as ff bashing even when you are doing nothing of the sort!

there has been a lot on here lately about the whole thing too! I am proud to bf and proud to talk about it! especially as i found it as hard as giving birth in the beg!

Smile
AnyFucker · 17/01/2011 21:01

you really shouldn't be cutting and pasting excerpts, complete with names, here

and depending on the wording of what you wrote (which is where?) I agree with every word she wrote

DuelingFanjo · 17/01/2011 21:03

I think this is the blog?

AnyFucker · 17/01/2011 21:03

You see, if you insist on putting your opinion "out there" (via a blog, or whatever), don't be too surprised if people disagree with it, and respond in kind < shrug >

OP posts:
TattyDevine · 17/01/2011 21:06

That was published in The Times, Anyfucker, why shouldn't it be copied on Mumsnet?

TheFallenMadonna · 17/01/2011 21:06

You're expressing your opinion, and making your friends aware of it. One of them is responding. Did you really not want, or expect, a response? Or just one that is in agreement?

Original poster
breastbadger · 17/01/2011 21:06

oops

OP posts:
DuelingFanjo · 17/01/2011 21:07

As far as I can see your friend has got confused by the mis-interpretation by the press re the stuff on weaning and has mistakenly thought that you (and the report) were making some kind of comment about breastfeeding.

It looks like she hasn't even read the blog properly because if she had she would have clearly seen that it wasn't about breast VS FF.

however, a lot of the posts on the rest of the blog are a bit anti-FF to be fair.

crisptart · 17/01/2011 21:09

YABU, comes across to me that you are objecting because someone dares to have the opposite view to you?
If you post stuff like that it's going to generate opinions, and not everyone's going to agree with you.
Don't understand why you'd feel the need to promote breastfeeding via your facebook page anyway?!

MsKLo · 17/01/2011 21:13

some people i know on fb express opinions that i find quite 'ughh' but is it really up to me to go on their page and express my dislike? i dont think it is and they are merely expressing, on their own fb page, what it is they like/dislike etc and why should they get a barrage of complaints for doing so? its not like they are posting here and asking for a fight Wink

Original poster
breastbadger · 17/01/2011 21:15

Good point, honestly happy for people not to agree with everything I say.
It's more the presumption that by thinking the media reporting in the last couple of days is shoddy at best, makes me a badgerer of women and their feeding choices.

OP posts:
Original poster
breastbadger · 17/01/2011 21:18

And there was me thinking it was about the timing of introducing solids.

OP posts:
MsKLo · 17/01/2011 21:18

why shouldn't she promote bf via her fb page? is it a taboo subject?

TheFallenMadonna · 17/01/2011 21:20

So now would be the time for you to respond and clarify your point, no? A dialogue. A conversation. Very old fashioned Wink

crisptart · 17/01/2011 21:20

No it's not a taboo subject, just don't understand why you'd feel ''got at' because someone doesn't agree with you!

crisptart · 17/01/2011 21:23

Oh and people who don't or can't breastfeed might feel 'got at' then, or is it ok for them to feel got at but not the other way round?! :-)

TattyDevine · 17/01/2011 21:23

I think the OP is more miffed that she's been misconstrued. Best thing to do really is just clarify your stance.

AnyFucker · 17/01/2011 21:24

is your user name ironic, then ?

and yes, mine is, before you ask Wink

Original poster
breastbadger · 17/01/2011 21:26

Ok, its not the disagreeing honestly. It's the perfunctory cut and pasted email with no further comment that I thought was a dig. Really, I like a good discussion.
If I've been oversensitive that's fine, just means i'll stop worrying about it.Smile

OP posts:
TheFallenMadonna · 17/01/2011 21:28

And respond to it.

Honestly, I thought you wanted to make your point. Just posting something on facebook isn't enough. Engage with your friend!