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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would it be awful to put DD in nursery even though I'm a sahm?

63 replies

Memoo · 14/01/2011 10:59

Maybe just one of two days a week to give myself a bit of a break.

Without banging on about it I've had a really bad year health wise and it has been suggested that this my be a good idea as it would be beneficial for me to have a bit of me time.

Just don't know what I think though

OP posts:
mutznutz · 14/01/2011 11:00

Why not? If you can get your child in a good nursery it would probably be a good thing from a social point of view.

How old is your child?

NinkyNonker · 14/01/2011 11:01

How old is she and can you afford it? Might be good for her to get a bit of both, at home with mummy, at nursery with others.

Original poster
Memoo · 14/01/2011 11:02

Sorry, she is 15 months. We can just about afford it

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 14/01/2011 11:02

Do it

OhCobblers · 14/01/2011 11:03

if you can afford it, then absolutely do it Smile.
hope your healthy problems are getting better.

HettyAmaretti · 14/01/2011 11:04

It would be a wise and sensible decision, as long as you can afford it. Very good for her social development too.

FranSanDisco · 14/01/2011 11:04

Go and have a look at a few places with her and see how you get on. YANBU.

TyraG · 14/01/2011 11:05

Why not? Moms need a break sometimes too. Plus it'll be good for her to socialise with other children and she'll enjoy it.

Original poster
Memoo · 14/01/2011 11:05

Ah thanks! feel better about it already. Will start looking into local nurseries.

OP posts:
Onetoomanycornettos · 14/01/2011 11:06

Absolutely, your health must come first cos you can't care properly for your child if you feel ill all the time (she says from experience). I would have done this had I had the money (and the type of child who would have gone happily to a nursery, my first definitely wasn't).

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts · 14/01/2011 11:14

Absolutely do it. I am a SAHM and have had my DD in nursery for one day a week since she was 15 months. It helped to improve her social skills as well as mine Grin It's nice ti be able to sit in a coffee shop and enjoy a coffee instead of being harassed!

2blessed2bstressed · 14/01/2011 11:16

Totally agree with Coconuts. Good for your child, to socialise and start to take part in the wider world, and good for you to have a wee break....even if you end up just doing housework!

FabbyChic · 14/01/2011 11:18

You won't be a sahm will you the times she is in the nursery, I feel it would be acceptable for one day a week but more than that reeks of luxury.

BendyBob · 14/01/2011 11:19

Do it! You will feel a million times better for it. Don't feel bad about it and no need to justify it to anyone either.

megonthemoon · 14/01/2011 11:19

It doesn't have to be full days either - many nurseries do mornings or afternoons or 9-3 hours if you want. So if having her in for a whole day seems a bit scary for you, you could do 2 half days instead.

Go for it!

megonthemoon · 14/01/2011 11:20

fsbbychic - what's the problem with luxury exactly?

Carikube · 14/01/2011 11:20

DD1 has been in nursery 1.5 days a week since she was 12 months; we put her in as DD2 was due when she was 14 months and we thought she would benegit from going whilst also giving me some 'time off' before the birth and then giving her a continuing activity whilst I was dealing with a small baby. I'm not technically a SAHM as I am officially on maternity leave (though not been at work in nearly 2 years now) and DD1 at 21 months still loves going to nursery, which will make my return to work in 3 months that m uch easier as I know she is already settled and we only need to worry about DD2...

2blessed2bstressed · 14/01/2011 11:21

Fabbychic...eh?? Why won't she be a sahm? Because she won't stay at home? Or won't she be a mum? And "reeks of luxury"? Seriously? The only thing I imagine reeking of luxury is the inside of Victoria Beckhams dressing room.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 14/01/2011 11:24

Fabbychic, I was clearly luxurious then. Our DD went to a nursery from the age of 16 months. It was cripplingly expensive, but, we were living in Oman where apart from the beach there is nothing for children to do. she loved every minute of it.
OP, go for it.

scoutliam · 14/01/2011 11:25

Go for it! Enjoy the time, luxuriate in it even.

TattyDevine · 14/01/2011 11:25

Do it. 15 months is the kind of age where they really start to get a lot out of it socially, they all sit at the table together nad have a snack, and all sit on the mat and have a story, etc. I remember being amazed seeing my son lining up to have his "turn" with a puppet that was on the end of a nursery nurse's arm. He'd never "queued" for anything at all in his life.

Its a luxury to be able to afford to pay for anything you want done but dont want to be doing yourself, for whatever reason. It seems an odd thing to say, Fabbychick, and I'm not really sure of the point of you saying that as usual

BendyBob · 14/01/2011 11:30

Lol at 'reeks of luxury'Grin

Who sets the benchmark between luxury and not luxury in these things? Does it matter anyway?Confused

JBellingham · 14/01/2011 11:34

Put her in nursery, she will get used to other sprogs, you will have a nice break.

bisybackson · 14/01/2011 11:35

Definitely go for it. But expect to feel guilty the first time you drop her off. I walked down the street convinced that everyone knew that I had nothing special to do and was just being a lazy mum. Feeling wore off pretty quickly though.

BuzzLightBeer · 14/01/2011 11:36

Yeah, how dare you do anything for yourself, OP, you're a mother now, you must stay on your knees and think only of others. Hmm

By which I mean its no-ones business but yours and ignore anyone who tells you otherwise.