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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

for not caring that I have 3 the same flavour

84 replies

gordyslovesheep · 09/01/2011 21:42

Just noticed that Victoria Beckham is expecting and oh yes - the press, various forums etc are already banging on about 'hoping it's a girl' and 'she's love a girl' and blah blah

when my second daughter was born my MIL said my (now ex) dh was disappointed - he wasn't but she felt he should be.

When my 3rd daughter arrived she didn;t visit for 3 weeks. Various 'friends' commented on her being 'the wrong' flavour and would we keep trying for a boy

what is wrong with NOT wanting a boy (or girl) - ex DH takes THE GIRLS to the football (one thing apparently he could only do with a son) and has no issue with their lack of willies

it makes me go grrrrr

OP posts:

mutznutz · 09/01/2011 22:47

Oh I always thought the 'D' meant you are Damn not being unreasonable lol

MsKLo · 09/01/2011 22:47

Victoria beckham is Pg? How did she manage that with her skinny little frame?!

DozyDoll · 09/01/2011 22:47

Sorry - just realised no need to answer!

chipmonkey · 09/01/2011 22:47

Imarriedafrog Congratulations!

Hopefully it's a boy so ds will have a brother.

THAT kind of comment?

cjdamoo · 09/01/2011 22:48

I have 4 boys. I ALWAYS get comments. No doubt this will be much worse in a few months when it becomes apperant I am again PG. I shall have to store up some scathing replies

DozyDoll · 09/01/2011 22:48

Thanks

DozyDoll · 09/01/2011 22:55

Congratulations cjdamoo!

I'm thinking up some scathing replies and will share them with the group if I think they're good enough.

There are quite a few of you out there with 5& DC aren't there? How old are your other DCs?

Imarriedafrog · 09/01/2011 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DozyDoll · 09/01/2011 23:01

Is this too scathing...?

I'd be delighted for a 5th son, but I bet your parents were devastated when you were born!

Yes it is...but WTF ..desperate times and all that.

Obviously this scathing reply is only suitable for interfering and UNRELATED busy bodies in the street/supermarket, not PIL etc!

chipmonkey · 09/01/2011 23:01

cjdamoo, I have four boys too and have had to stop going to one barbers because the woman at the till goes on and on about whether I'm going to "go again" and wouldn't I love a girl etc...

Now I would actually like a little girl but would never say that in front of the boys as I adore them all and would never want any of them to think I didn't want them or that they were second-best because they're not! And it's not their fault that I like pink tat!

Icoulddoitbetter · 09/01/2011 23:02

My DH's family is stuffed with boys so it came as no surprise to us when a nice blue one popped out! We've just started trying for DC 2, and it freaks me out a little to realise that I think I'd like another boy a teensy bit more than I'd like a girl. Now that doesn't mean that I care that much, or that I'd be disappointed if I have a DD, I'd be utterly thrilled. I just find it wierd that I seem to have a teeny tiny preference towards a boy.

But I do not understand people who are "devastated" if they get the wrong sex. Unless there is a medical reason for having a preference (i.e hx of muscular dystrophy or something).

Secretwishescometrue · 09/01/2011 23:03

People always comment though don't they? No matter what your family is like there's always these same ol winners they come out with... Can't win! I wish posh and becks all the best and hope she has an easy healthy pg and their baby boy or girl has a safe and healthy arrival. From what iv seen of them they adore their boys and look like good parents (from what iv seen anyways...)

clam · 09/01/2011 23:06

I once knew of a woman who had 4 boys and was desperate for a girl. She fell pregnant with her 5th, and duly discovered at her scan that it was another boy. She was devastated. One of her (lovely) boys said to his teacher that "mummy spent all weekend crying because her new baby is a boy and she's fed up with us boys!"

ChinaCup · 09/01/2011 23:14

I had everyone from my mother to the woman on the till in M&S telling me I might get lucky and have a girl when I was expecting DS2; I was desperate for another boy. I love my all-boys family, wouldn't want things any other way.

Clary · 09/01/2011 23:18

It's odd isn't it.

I had the same thing from the other side - when I was pg with no 3, and had a boy and a girl, people asked me why I was having a third as I already had "one of each".

Like the only reason for having children was to have the various sexes.

Actually one reason we did have no 3 was so that one of the DC could have a same-sex sibling, which I think is a real advantage of 3 the same.

TaperJeanGirl · 09/01/2011 23:26

I hate this, I had 2 lovely girls one after another, when I fell for dc3, who happened to be a boy, everyone said oh well done you have your boy now, you can stop, like my gorgeous dd2 was some sort of disappointment, anyway, am now preg again and I really did think nobody would comment as we have girls and a boy, but now people still say we need this one to be a boy to even it up.....

chipmonkey · 09/01/2011 23:28

clam, that is so sad. I would hate, hate, hate to think any of my lads would feel like that. When I was pg with ds4, ds1 and ds2 both told me that their friends had asked if I wanted a girl. I told them to tell their friends that I didn't mind as long as the baby was healthy. Which he was, luckily. Have to say, I do love having babies and having all boys has given me an excuse to keep going. Not sure if dh would have agreed to keep sprogging if we'd had one of each. Saddo that I am, I am dreading potty training ds4 as we have no-one else to pass my lovely cloth nappies on to.

AnotherMumOnHere · 09/01/2011 23:55

I had all these different things said to me and that was 30-40 years ago ........ so nothing changes.

WilheminaAteHer · 09/01/2011 23:57

I think the main problem with this "wrong flavour" malarkey is that some people are just extremely unimaginative.

Pity them.

Liv77 · 09/01/2011 23:58

I have 1 DS and am currently expecting my 2nd DC. I am already sick of people saying "oh you must want a girl", I don't mind what I have and if I have a boy I will be just as happy as I'm sure he will bring me as much joy as my 1st DS. I found out the sex when PG with DS but have delibrately not found out this time as whatever I get will be a lovely surprise and I like that everyone else has to wait until the birth to find out as well

I was chatting to a lady at work with 3 DS and she said exactly the same happened to her, it was nice to chat with someone who actually believed me when I said I don't mind what I have.

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 11/01/2011 22:35

Obviosuly we don't know if the Beckhams have had sex selection but they do live in LA so who knows! The press attention may have even pushed them into it? Who knows....

TBH if I was them I would be very worried someone 'helping me' to get pregnant. They may do something naughty like swap the sperm or eggs or worse put back in a baby rabbit or posh poodle or something!

LIGHT HARTED POST - ONLY JOKING! No one bash me!

chipmonkey · 12/01/2011 12:17

I do feel sorry for VB. I think the press have amde a lot more of her gender preference than she actually felt and now, even if she has a dd naturally, it will be assumed that she had PGD.

chipmonkey · 12/01/2011 12:19

Obviously that is the full extent of my pity for VB! Other than that I am hugely envious of her!

FoghornLeghorn · 12/01/2011 12:23

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FoghornLeghorn · 12/01/2011 12:26

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