to wish the mummies around here were a bit more slummy?

[deliakate]

We moved to a lovely leafy area outside London before starting a family, and I've been lucky enough to meet some great people with babies the same age.... there are one or two I get on really well with, but I can't help feeling with a lot of people I just can't be myself. They all seem so GOOD and wholesome and perfect.

Maybe I give off that image too, but I doubt it. I miss having my old friends about who would give their children funky names, were happy to have a messy house, get a bit drunk and not be on top of everything all the time. Is this just motherhood? Or would I be better in London - are there more slightly less 'normal' parents there with more creative outlooks and less desire to fit in?

People are people...you'll find a mixture in every area if you look hard enough. If you miss your friends and you can move back to them...then do.

Oh and you should always be yourself with everyone...if they don't like you for it, tough

Sounds terrifying! I'd last about 5 minutes.

I'm sure they are not as wholesome and perfect as you seem to think

Sounds like you have moved in to upper class hell!

DH needs to live within commuting distance of London, so we couldn't move nearer to old friends unfort. Maybe this place attracts a propensity of 'nice' types.... its very us and them with the 'council estate' people not really mixing within the town centre

Move round here, i'm as slummy as they come!
My house isn't perfect by any means, I have 5 wild lovely children and some of the mums round here think I'm certifiable, but I do have a few close friends to keep me sane. That's what you need.

Not anywhere near the herts/cambs border are you????

Go to the children's centre playgroups - that's where I've met all my scummy more interesting friends

Also our La Leche League group seems to attract a curious mixture of lentil weaving hippies, middle class mums desparate to do the right thing, and then people like me who just couldn't be bothered to wean their toddler, and were sick of feeling like a freak in front of all the "perfect mummies".

"When Delia Kate moves to her new suburb, everything seems so perfect. The groomed mothers and their well-scrubbed children; the perfect husbands with their impressive jobs and gleaming cars. But soon, Delia discovers the dark truth behind the immaculate lawns and the coffee-mornings. And nothing will ever be the same again."

You're a rebel Mummy...stuck in a world of Sandra Dees! I am the same...all my friends haven't had kids...all the Mum's I know are like the straight kids at school...nothing in common with any of them.

"Nothing will ever be the same again!" wept Harriet Gormless, Delia Kate's next door neighbour.

"Not since Marcus came out as a drag queen and started wearing maxi dresses to his round table meetings!"

Delia Kate smirked inwardly and cut another slice of Battenburg for Harriet...let them think her cake was common! It was time she began acting like herself.

Wait until the children get to about 5 and the wife swapping starts. You may then see the perfect mummies crumble.

Had this problem big time when I lived abroad. Saying that, I am a bit OCD of a clean freak (though I don't mind lived in mess and toys) - and I don't think that excludes me from being interesting and a bit bohemian IYSWIM.
Besides, scratch that glossy veneer and I'm sure you'll find a lot of antidepressants and morning gin, affairs and kinky goings-on.

ROFL @ Wimples post.

I think you have described the town I live in. Where are you?

You don't live in B Stortford are do you? Only kidding, sort of.
There are plenty of slummy normal mummies around who have to work and still can't do the whole 'designer clothes' 'got a Kitchen Aid/could buy up all of Steamer' 'flash cars' thing.
There's a lot of people who are more unhappy than you think - never judge appearances, some of these women might be more like you when you get to know them. x

funny you should say this was your experience out of London as my mate moved to London and finds all her new friends are glammed up and made up all the time!

I wish I had more energy to glam up!

Don't be fooled. Behind closed doors it Chocolate buttons for tea and nappies till they are five like these rest of us :)

and (gulp) M&S children's ready meals

God bless the childrens' ready meal section. Alf is very partial to a bit of Chicken tikka Masala!

Sounds like herts to me

Come to my place. It's slummy-heaven!

Live in North Herts, not far from both B Stortford and Cambridge border. Am smiling rather at the posts which mentioned this (not born and bred locally, am a London girl and there does appear to be a difference in attitude!).

Are you local deliakate? Think you and I would get on.

Am I the only person who recoiled a bit at the use of the word 'normal' in the OP?

It sounds a bit tautological tbh; if you chose to live somewhere like that you can't really be surprised that it is like that iyswim.