to wish the mummies around here were a bit more slummy?

[deliakate]

We moved to a lovely leafy area outside London before starting a family, and I've been lucky enough to meet some great people with babies the same age.... there are one or two I get on really well with, but I can't help feeling with a lot of people I just can't be myself. They all seem so GOOD and wholesome and perfect.

Maybe I give off that image too, but I doubt it. I miss having my old friends about who would give their children funky names, were happy to have a messy house, get a bit drunk and not be on top of everything all the time. Is this just motherhood? Or would I be better in London - are there more slightly less 'normal' parents there with more creative outlooks and less desire to fit in?

Well, in broad terms, I suppose income groups of a feather flock together...there will be peer pressure..

please Tell: Do mums and dads get catty at the school gates? Is there a pecking order?

It amuses me to think there may well be..
Nowt as funny as folks. As they say in Yorkshire

Ha ha! I dyed my hair again, before term began, just in case... ha ha! People like to keep the shutters down about what happens behind closed doors. I don't have much in common with most of the mums at the school gate apart from having similar aged children. It's a bit like going back to school myself!

Ha ha, bupcakes! Do they have hardcore in their hair?

I'm another one! Not a million miles away, and do know what you mean. It's the scrubbed-up, trying-too-hard that I can't be arsed with.

But not as though everyone does.

I think I miss the well-educated, arty lefty set from London, more than the specifically slummy looking - though I suppose the two are connected.

Any more fiercely intelligent and getting more left-wing as we age mums out there who know where I'm coming from?

I live in commuterville bit of west kent - and I find this!

Either people at school gate think I am too common chat to or they think I am posh because I live in one of the bigger houses round here (very mixed area, less expensive bit of town) I end up feeling like a right billy no mates at the school gates

wondering if any of you are near me, we could be slummy mummy friends!

Oh and if you don't take your baby to every baby class available ohhh the shame :0. Now I'm involved with the whole school run and have to get up an hour before ds to ensure I am groomed!! Surely it's not just east Herts??

Just be yourself - they will probably all breathe a collective sigh of relief and you will be the mummy messiah who finally showed them that it is ok to leave for school with the breakfast dishes still on the table And to admit to it

They will probably love you for it - you'll be a breath of fresh air!

St Albans, I'd bet.

I must be lucky cos my bit of herts is lovely and I meet lots of welcoming accepting ladies

I feel your pain

Middle class suburban hell here. Why can't I meet people like you in real life?

Margarita and poker nights! Getting older, more intelligent and lefty hell yes!

Anyone read Revolutionary Road?

GabbyLoggon , yes! Most are ok, but there is a select group who will happily close ranks and exclude lone mums if they see fit at our school. I used to go find said mums, and talk just to annoy the playground mafia.

OP seems to have disappeared, maybe the playground mafia saw this and took a hit out on her?

OP, I feel exactly the same. I am the only slummy mummy at DD's school I think . I have neither the money nor inclination to have my nails extended or face lifted, nor do I wear designer (but they're only diffusion line Dior Kreecher') clothing.
Chin up.