to charge friend for babysitting on NYE?

[lisad123isasnuttyasaboxoffrogs]

Friend knows I dont do NYE and explained that she couldnt find a babysitter and would I be willing to do it for her, saying she would pay me. I said I normally charge £50 for the night on NYE.
A few weeks passed and via another friend I was made to feel very guilty that said friend couldnt go because she couldnt afford the £50. I then said I would do it for £30 as shes a friend but she needed to be back by 1.30am at that price.
All agreed, seemed fine
Babysat last night for her LO. One was fine but the other wouldnt go to bed till 11pm and was very rude to me.
12.40am I get a text telling me "remember I said I would pay you £20 tonight and £10 in the week", I replied I dont remember agreeing to that, but fine see you later. Then she texts and say "well my husband didnt think we should pay you at all because we are friends and help each other out!"

Now yes we do help each other out, with things like school pick ups and drop off or watching each others kids if needed. Now I never ask her to do this for me unless really needed and if I ask her she will always ask the next day for the return favor and normally not because she needs it but because she wants more time to self. She is always a favor for a favor type.
Anyways she has never had my children in the vening, only once when DH was rushed because to hospital. I have had her kids a number of evenings and never charged or been fussed about it, but she does tend to take the mick with things like arriving back 2-3 hours late or letting me continue to have the kids at mine when her dh has come home and gone out again when he could have come ad got them.

so sorry that ended up long.
I just dont know what to say to her next time. I tend to spend less kifds time with her as my dd1 doesnt really get on with her dd1 and they are in the same class.

Are you a professional childminder OP? If so then I agree she's taking the pee.

Ah, that makes a huge difference then. Sorry, I didn't pick up on the "normally charge £50" (duh emotion).

She offered to pay you as well and you could have gone somewhere else!! I would go around asap for the rest of the money and not be doing anymore favours for this 'friend'.

I think she is taking the piss if you regularly babysit for her. It's asking a lot for someone to babysit on NYE,I don't think I'd ask even a close friend. However, personally I wouldn't have charged a friend- I would either have done it for free or made up an excuse.

Sounds to me like the friendship has run its course.

funny enough shes a childminder, Im a qualified nursery nurse with 11 years experience, police check and first aid.

If I could have done it as favor for favor, I would have but my DD1 doesnt like going there too often as her DD1 is unkind to her and DD2 is at special school now, no where near her.
Last time I asked for a favor eg picking dd2 from old school because I was running late trying to look at new car (not new, secondhand iyswim) she refused as it was raining, so tbh I have stopped asking unless we are stuck at hospital with dh and no one else can help.

Obviously it's as bit late now but since you're running a professional service there, you should really ask for payment up front and give her a reciept..though I expect being a friend you didn't think it was necessary

Your last post says it all! She wouldn't help you out because it was raining!!!!

YADNBU, dump her. Its not like your children are going to miss hers.

YANBU. Sounds like she's taking the piss and sorry but I don't think you'll ever see that other £10

YANBU. You operate a business, you gave her the terms and conditions, she accepted then went back on what you both agreed with.

Bill her for the extra money she owes you.

Don't do her any more favours.

Shes a user.

I am a qualified nursery nurse with years of experience.
Pre ds I have babysat for friends on NYE and never charged, they are my friends.
I just couldn't charge a friend for babysitting.
so i think yabu to charge but it doesn't sound like she is a very good friend so I would dump her !

thing is its not a bussiness, but a way of earning a few pennnies which I do running courses and just add it to those earnings when im working out monies ect.
in know your all right just dont know how to dump friend :(

If it's not a proper business I'd be careful kicking up a stink until you know the legal implications etc. The law seems to change all the time regarding ofsted, insurance etc...Even your CRB probably wouldn't cover you for babysitting.

don't babysit for her again. It's causing too much bad feeling.

your right, i wont do it again, ceratinly wont be charging, but tbh I think as its in their own home, laws are different than if i was having them at mine iyswim

dump her

trust me i wont be kicking up a stink about £10, not worth it

30 pound for babysitting on NYE is a bargain. And if she was happy to agree to it, she is really out of order to say her husband said they shouldn't pay. You don't have to look after her children on NYE it is not your job.

I would be done with her tbh.

Just stop doing her favours, always be busy/vague about your plans and don't contact her (if you do want to dump her), she will get the message in the end.

mutznutz - you don't need a CRB to babysit! Anyone can babysit, though if your earnings are above a certain threshold they may be taxable.

i agree she sounds like a dishonest chancer and you will be better off without her in your life.

She sounds like a leech. I've dropped people who used to use me like that.

i would never consider asking or expecting a friend of mine you look after my children on NYE without paying them a very good rate. £30 is a bargain, it would cost more than even £50 for many babysitters. But, tbh i also offer payment to my friends to babysit my children on normal days, as they are my children, not theirs. Most of the time, they say not to worry about it as they love having them but it is bloody rude to expect it for nothing.

YANBU, and I totally understand how hard it is to dump a using friend, been there myself and now, rather than dump them officially, i just backed off and make less/no effort, see them socially, polite and friendly, but no big deal about meeting off my own back, and certainly no favours.

learn your lesson lisa123 dont babysit for her again, dont do her any favours, she is no friend of yours - just a user.

£30 for NYE is a bargain and her DH quibbling over it on the evening is pathetic.

I think that the point is that you had an agreement and that she is now trying to back out of keeping her side. This means that she is unreliable and not above taking the p*ss. The fact that there was money involved is a rd herring. It is no different to you (say) agreeing to pick her child up on Mon if she has yours the next day and then her ringing Tues morning to say that she has changed her mind and doesn't do "returning favours" any more. No one is perfect though. You just need to re-evaluate your friendship based on the fact that she is now the type that is happy to break an arrangement. Decide if you think that her friendship is worth keeping on this basis.

You don't have to do anything specific to "dump" her, just don't be available to do her favours when you'd rather not, and don't ask her for any in return so you don't feel you "owe" her. TBH it doesn't sound like you're getting many favours from her anyway, as she "calls them in" straight away. Up to you if you still help her out if she's got a genuine problem, which you would maybe do for anyone without expecting aything back. But you don't have to do pickups etc for people, specially if they have a habit of taking the piss. What you would do for a genuine friend is one thing, but this person sounds like "parent of similar aged children" rather than an actual friend, and doesn't sound like she'd be any loss from your life.