To sit in this horrible bedroom and just weep?

[recklesswoman]

Oh my Christ.

DH and I are staying the night with BiL. I've spent the evening fighting off two huge dogs who repeatedly jumped up, lunged at my face, sat on my handbag and scratched (cue SiL cheerfully 'oh we think she has mange!'), walked the length of the room weeing..

This continued while we attempted to eat dinner from our laps, one-handed whilst shoving dogs noses away from our plates.

I've just gone up to spare room, DH still happily downstairs, and the bed is literally covered in dog hairs. Sheets, duvet, both pillows. The whole house including the bedroom stinks of unwashed dogs.

Aibu to sit in the corner of the room and just cry? What the bloody hell should I do? I can't bring myself to lie down in that disgusting bed!

I've enjoyed reading this thread, well done OP for your successful escape! Yesterday I made up my spare bed for guests arriving today, when I went into the room today my cat was sleeping on the bed - aaaaaaargh. Vaguely considered trying to brush off the hairs but after reading this, I will change the whole bed.

This thread reminds me of my granny's house. I still remember my mum marching us all home at midnight because she'd pulled back the covers on the bed only to release a massive cloud of fleas into the air

Great thread! Thanks for the laugh!! And OP, I am glad you and your DH saw the light of day and left.
Yuck yuck yuck1

thenightsky Exactly the same thing happened at my grandparents place, a couple of hours after my Dad had witnessed his mother line up the dirty plates after dinner and let their lab lick them clean. After that we always stayed in the local B&B and if Grandma insisted on cooking Mum brought packed meals for my sister and me!

I should note Grandma did wash the plates after dog licking!!! But was never a thorough domestician!

My nan used to do that too, when I look back I don't know how we weren't all ill, she washed the plates up but if our cat gets at mine I put them on a 90oc dishwasher cycle not a dip in fairy liquid.

Yes, yes, grabbing at the poor mutts twigs and berries.

Whatever tickles your pickle as my Grandma would say, but seriously

Eurrrrgh. I feel for you.

It's often the case that Doggy People simply cannot get what it means to be Not A Doggy Person. They do not understand that we do not want their slavering stinking hounds licking our plates/faces/hands during a meal (or at any time, frankly), and we do not want to be lying on beds/ sitting on sofas covered with dog-hair.

I think people who really like dogs are weird, and this is why.

And before anyone jumps, I grew up with a dog, and odd parents who treated the dog(s) like children, and forgot they had human children.
I was told to get off the chair so the dog could sit down.

This thread has made me laugh, especially Hester and the pooping sausage dogs.

Well done OP, hope BIL has enquired about your poorly uterus today?

We also have a downstairs dog. DH is stinky and moults enough as it is in our bed.

Oh, I had to come back and re-read bits. I have found myself laughing out loud in empty rooms today remembering this from last night. Fantastic thread.

I'm a doggy person and I don't want them licking me or plates or leaving fur on couches or beds either

We went to France earlier this year, invited by DH's cousin. She offered us the use of her mother's apartment, which we gratefully accepted. Cue me dreaming of glamorous French living...

We turned up to walk into a wall of fag smoke and dog hair everywhere. I was horrified. The bathroom was horrendous, the fridge stinky and mouldy, the cot stank of fags. There was no dog shit, thankfully, but the bed had been seriously doggied. DS crawled across the floor and came up covered in dust and hair.

We lasted one night, during which I woke up feeling like an elephant had sat on my chest, despite the fact I enjoy the odd social ciggy. The next morning we found the nearest hotel and spent the rest of the holiday getting up at the crack of dawn to get back to the apartment before the mother so they would think we had stayed there.

The only redeeming feature was she had an Antilop.

Praise the Lord for vaginas

I have a dog but there's no way I'd have guests sleeping on hairy beds, or let the dog bug guests.

op, what did you do in the end? I would have gone downstairs and asked for vacuum cleaner, and offer to help her change the bedsheets, as she had obviously been so busy making a wonderful dinner that she hadnt had a chance, etc etc

ladysybil, scroll up, she left!

MissMarjoribanks: I have to ask if your Hostess really had an Antilope or did your post fall foul of an autocorrect...

Intrigued... wonders if it was the Antilope that was the smoker....

oh this thread is marv

well DONE OP - viva la vagina

Have been thinking of you all day!! Well done both!
I keep giggling at 'Shaved a Monkey!'

LMHM - the much loved MN special, an Antilop highchair like this , not an antilope!!

Ahh, Ikea....

Sorry all our highchair time was outside the UK...

Consider myself better MNeducated!