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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think a teapot is a crap Xmas present

76 replies

feedme · 26/12/2010 10:47

My dh gave me a cookbook (which I had asked for by name), a lush ball and a fucking teapot for Xmas. I had knitted him a jumper, and also given him a book and a bottle of whisky and other stuff. We are not short of money. Every time I look at the teapot I want to cry. AIBU?

OP posts:

Firawla · 26/12/2010 11:36

yabu, so ungrateful i don't see anything wrong with it really he got you a couple of other things too inc the one you asked for. looking @ it and wanting to cry?! ffs get a grip!!!! major overreaction.

Quattrocento · 26/12/2010 11:36

I'd love a teapot for Christmas. Particularly a nice one. I feel inspired by this thread to ask DH to get me one for my birthday.

Maybe a nice Victorian number...

fluffles · 26/12/2010 11:37

i got one of those beautiful glass boden ones once and i loved it.
but then i love tea. a lot. so it is a thoughtful gift to give me.

if you don't really like tea much then it's a bit rubbish.. i love tea, and love teapots

YunoYurbubson · 26/12/2010 11:37

The teapot itself isn,t a good present or a crap present. Personally I,d be delighted with a teapot. You obviously aren,t though. It would have been nice of your husband to get you something you would have been more thrilled with. Never mind. Don,t belly ache about a present. Just do better hints next year.

ABudafulSightWereHappyTonight · 26/12/2010 11:38

tingletangle - is that to me? Yes, it is a lot of presents. It is a sign of a man being in Tesco the day before Xmas Eve and panicking that he has not bought anything that I would actually like and have actually suggested and buying a lot of stuff.

TrillianAstra · 26/12/2010 11:43

A teapot is not a crap present.

It might not be a good present for you, but it is not a crap present in itself.

tingletangle · 26/12/2010 11:44

Yes it was Buda. I really do not get present angst. I would be overwhelmed by that number of presents.

edam · 26/12/2010 11:44

You obviously didn't want a teapot so to you it is a crap present. A lush ball is a bit miserable if he buys one for everyone. And you aren't short of money so why didn't he buy you a gift set, anyway?

My sister used to collect teapots. Thing is, all the unimaginative rellies seized on this and bought her nothing but ruddy teapots every birthday and Christmas. She collected NICE teapots - antiques or with nice designs. My Dad and various other rellies bought her cheap stuff from supermarkets - just the first teapot they saw, obviously thinking 'oh, that'll do for XXXX'. She gave up collecting them she was so fed up!

QuietTiger · 26/12/2010 11:48

One year, my Christmas present from my parents was them paying to spey my 5 month old cat. Useful, yes, but not exactly something you can put under the xmas tree.

As for the teapot being a crap present - was it a "dash into Tesco, oh, that'll do" kind of present, or had some level of thought gone into it to think that you'd quite like it?

alemci · 26/12/2010 11:52

i think you did ok because he bought you other things as well. if it had just been the teapot it would have been different.

mine bought me a body shop set in strawberry which was ok but how much body butter/lotion can one use. he will get me a gold chain to go with a necklace from last year after christmas.

we are not that flush and i don't mind as we have been married nearly 20 years' and i am used to it. usually end up buying my own gift and he pays for it.

he pays the bills and the mortgage so i cannot complain. he is faithful and loving even though he is not hugely romantic.

ABudafulSightWereHappyTonight · 26/12/2010 11:53

edam - your poor sis! I can imagine that scenario though.

tingle - no angst here really. I would actually have been disappointed not to get the frying pan as it was such a joke. The Lego he says is for me but is for him really! The cheap smellies piss me off. Would rather have nothing tbh. My only 'angst' is that DH works in town. 10 mins from a nice shopping street. He could have gone and got something nice. One nice thing. But no. He insisted on going to Tesco. For me that shows a laziness and a can't be bothered attitude. However he has lots of good points and I know what he is like so am not too bothered. I love my cookery book as there was some effort put into that.

snowedinstill · 26/12/2010 12:00

Had to come on here because I feel awful that I thought the same thing as also receied a teapot but from my sister. It's not the teapot, I just feel like she doesn't really know me as year after year, she loves my gifts, and I always feel unreasonably disappointed. As soon as the thought popped into my head, I thought 'YANBU!!!'

Here goes...

Bought my sister jewellery, not mega expensive, but not cheap either. I knew she would love it as it matches something else she has. I'd put alot of thought into it. It was the first present I'd bought and I was chuffed as heard her telling her friend what she wanted at dinner the other night.

I got a teapot. I know I won't ever use it. It matches a mug I have which I bought because I collect mugs. I don't use a teapot, because if I used a teapot, I'd already have one. And it's a really tacky one. There is a teapot I would have liked actually. This is not it.

I feel awful as she has text me thanking me and I didn't get around to replying and I have seen her since, so I think she knows, and now I feel guilty.

I know you don't give to receive, but was puzzled. DH knew what I'd got her and knew what she was getting me, and asked if I liked it, 'I gave her a bracelet,what do you think?'. In future, hers will be the last thing I get as I will get hubby to intervene and ask according to a sliding scale if her gift is teapot or bracelet.

Just to stress that it's not the money at all - my favourite present was from my secret santa at work who barely knows me with a limit of £5.

I'm such a spoiled brat, I feel terrible. No need to flame me. I'm flaming myself.

Ephiny · 26/12/2010 12:48

I think it would have been a nice present from anyone else, but from your DH who presumably lives with you? Isn't that really a present for the house not for you? Or are you the only tea-drinker?

GodRestYeEllieMentalmen · 26/12/2010 12:59

My husband bought me a lovely array of stuff. A handbag, Lush gift set, books, a dressing gown.... What I really wanted was a ticket to see my favourite band in March. I had dropped lots of hints. :( The gifts he bought were lovely. Just sort of 'stuff' though.

I will never tell him I was disappointed, and the bag is very nice. I just wish he had spent less and bought the one thing I wanted....

perfumeditsawonderfullife · 26/12/2010 13:02

I know what you mean. I share a birthday with Audrey Hepburn and have liked her for many years. I have one really nice print of her framed. Only now, every birthday and Christmas I get Audrey hepburn tat from everyone, suitcases, mugs, teapots, coasters, coctail books, notelets, egg cups, you name it, it's got Audrey on it.

I now know how my dad felt. As a golfer we got him themed mugs, tees, bags, books, the lot.

Bah humbug.

Still, i love tea, if you like tea a nice teapot is a good gift, no?

Lonnie · 26/12/2010 13:07

YABU he gave you what you had specifically asked for.. ok you dont like the teapot so put it away and enjoy your book (I would suggest making a pot of tea to drink as you read it though) imo a bottle of whisky is a dull present I would much rather have the teapot

moondog · 26/12/2010 13:08

Perfumed, what a nightmare!
(Come to think of it, I share a birthday with her too! pray God noone makes such a tenuous connection. )

perfumeditsawonderfullife · 26/12/2010 14:00

The Audrey tat will eventually find you moondog

DrSeuss · 26/12/2010 14:10

I would love to get any present that I hadn't had to specify along with supplier, price and internet link! Very few surprises under the tree for me. Also had to do the same for DH's and DS's presents. No one in either family seems to have any imagination.

expatinscotland · 26/12/2010 14:11

My mother has a friend, now married for many years.

The first year they were married, her husband got her a new bedspread for her birthday.

So, on his birthday, she got him the sheets to match it.

On Christmas, he bought her an iron. She'd found out beforehand, so she bought him an ironing board cover.

Thereafter, he learned his lesson and never bought her household stuff again unless she specifically asked for it.

If your huband gets you stuff from Tesco after you told him, 'No stuff from from Tesco,' then take it back and get the money and buy yourself something else.

When I get gifts I don't want, I either make them into something I want or can sell or give them to charity.

upahill · 26/12/2010 14:21

Godrest.... Would tickets to a gig be a Christmas present?

BerryinClover · 26/12/2010 14:39

You could save both yourselves trouble (and money) by declaring a gift amnesty next year. New partner was relieved when I suggested this last year (tho we were no longer together by the time the question came round this year )

expatinscotland · 26/12/2010 14:50

I don't like gift amnesties.

mumeeee · 26/12/2010 15:40

Ateapot would have been fine here, He did get you other presents as well, So Yes I think you are bieng a littlebit unreaxonable.

mippy · 26/12/2010 15:48

My mother asked me what I wanted. I told her i was a grown-up with a job and she didn't need to get me anything. But she insisted and I said the Mad Men box-set.

She promptly forgot and instead bought me a sleeveless T-shirt from Damart with an embroidered cat on the front and the slogan 'I'm not hairy, I just cuddle my cat a lot!' I am a 28yr old buxom professional who doesn't own a cat.

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