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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to of expected a better day

37 replies

CountryDweller · 25/12/2010 15:50

Firstly DH gave me nothing for christmas, not even a card. No christmas greeting either. No help from him with dinner or the dishes, hes sat watching tv now. Xmas Angry
A fox killed all the chickens over night.
The upside is DS (2) is having a lovely time playing with his toys.

OP posts:
TheMonster · 25/12/2010 15:51

Bah! Hambug eh?
Still, things can only get better.

Recipient31D · 25/12/2010 15:55

Sorry about the cickens, and glad your DS is happy with his gifts!

However, YANBU that you have a husband that you live with and he cannot even proffer a Christmas greeting?
Had you agreed to not buy each other anything?
If not, this behaviour is indicative...

JeezyPeeps · 25/12/2010 16:03

Go out and get yourself something extra sepcial in the sales, and sod the miserly bastard!

MeowyChristmasEveryone · 25/12/2010 17:37

Have you asked him to help you? I know it sounds a bit revolutionary, but many times, if something needs doing in our house I don't wanna do it either so why would I think that DH would in his free time?

Just ask, making it sound like it's something that you couldn't possibly do alone, and then think about addressing the fact that he wasn't prepared to offer some time in the New Year.

jollyoldstnickschick · 25/12/2010 17:43

My h didnt get me anything either ...hes like that if he gets in amood so i was ready for it ....I still bought him stuff though.

FrostyAndSlippery · 25/12/2010 17:53

How mean of him. Is he even sorry?!

notmyproblem · 25/12/2010 18:19

Why would anyone be married to a man who sat at the tv and refused to help with anything for dinner? Is Christmas all about the woman slaving away in the kitchen first cooking, then cleaning up while the man gets to sit on his arse and do nothing?

Bollocks. Stand up for yourself.

FrostyAndSlippery · 26/12/2010 00:00

Did your day get any better?

tingletangle · 26/12/2010 00:04

My DH did not get me anything either so that would not bother me.

I am sorry about your chickens.

I do not understand why your DH is not helping, I am sure you deserve better.

Original poster
CountryDweller · 26/12/2010 00:17

The day never got better, so as soon as DS went to bed I did to.

Looking forward to next christmas now with DS and my family, he can sort his own out Xmas Grin

OP posts:
Blackeyeddog · 26/12/2010 00:25

Sorry for your chickens, poor things.

My dp was an utter tit today also. I did dinner but he was in such a mood he ate his in the kitchen while dcs and me were at the table. really, wtf? And I did the dishes. AND I was up all night with teething/hungry one year old!

Next year (gritted teeth) am going elsewhere!

mumoverseas · 26/12/2010 06:08

sorry you had a crap day yesterday. I did too, DH was a complete twunt but on the positive, it made me realise (what a lot of friends have been saying for over a year) that I deserve better so my NY resolution is to move on and build a better life for myself and the children by next Christmas

BubbaAndBump · 26/12/2010 06:15

Blimey some of your D(??!! - really?)Hs sound like absolute childish gits :(

Glad your kids seem to have made up for it on the whole (sorry blackeyeddog).

Get up early, go out for a walk/shop/catch up with friends or relatives who love you back and leave him to it. Xmas Smile

Triggles · 26/12/2010 07:30

Sorry you had a bit of a miserable day. But I have to agree that sometimes you need to ask to get help. My DH made the roast dinner (he always does), and then helped clean up the kitchen afterwards because I asked him to, no problems.

I am curious why he bought nothing for you for Christmas. DH didn't buy anything separate for me, however, it was because we agreed to buy a DVD set together that we both wanted as our "gift for each other" rather than try to get separate gifts. (plus our anniversary is coming up in 2 weeks and we'll buy each other a small gift for that Grin)

Did he just not bother? What did you buy for him?

purplepidjbauble · 26/12/2010 07:36

Wow, some of you have married and had kids with right knobends! No wonder the divorce rate is rising, with men acting like that Xmas Confused

mumoverseas · 26/12/2010 08:57

purple I totally agree, I sometimes feel like I have 5 children instead of 4 Wink

Original poster
CountryDweller · 26/12/2010 09:07

I'm doing the same as mumoverseas. I don't intend to still be here next christmas. Hopefully by easter I'll have moved back to my home town.
Triggles I bought him the bits and pieces he wanted from DS and a dvd box set from me that he had requested. There was no agreement this year not to buy eachother anything. Xmas Sad

OP posts:
showmewine · 26/12/2010 09:18

I am sorry as well that some of you are married to knobends (love the word) its Christmas fgs time for some men to pull their fingers out....there are better men out there

Makes me appreciate what i have even though my own family couldn't be bothered to see me or DS, DH more than made up for it :)

ABudafulSightWereHappyTonight · 26/12/2010 09:18

I am sorry so many of you had sad days. Esp as they were caused by people who are supposed to love you.

mumoverseas - I am sorry. Had no idea. So pleased for you that your older DCs go to you or your Xmas would have been even more miserable.

CuddlyNotFat · 26/12/2010 09:23

Apparently, January 7th (or thereabouts) is the most popular Hmm day for instigation of divorce. Reading about some of these Hs, it's not hard to see why!

Triggles · 26/12/2010 09:41

CountryDweller - that's sad. Have you asked him why he didn't buy you anything? I would. DH really wanted to buy something for me as we got closer and closer to Christmas, and mentioned changing the agreement, but I was the one that said "no, we agreed no other presents, that we'd focus on the children." So he stuck with it. But again, I knew we had our anniversary coming up in the beginning of January so he will buy something for me for that.

CuddlyNotFat - I didn't realise that. I suppose that makes a bit of sense though, as the holidays are so stressful. It can bring out the best in some and the worst in others.

LadyintheRadiator · 26/12/2010 10:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

clam · 26/12/2010 10:38

mumoverseas - followed your other thread. Sorry that your twuntish DH managed to spoil the Christmas you worked so hard to make happen at all.

Original poster
CountryDweller · 26/12/2010 10:40

I haven't bothered asking him. It would cause even more bad feeling. Hes got a mood on him at the moment so its not worth the hassle.
Like I said I'm looking to leave in the couple of months then DS will have the best christmas and birthdays without the moody excuse of a man upsetting things.
New years resolution GET MYSELF A LIFE Xmas Smile

OP posts:
swanandduck · 26/12/2010 10:54

Wow, I appreciate my DH more than ever after reading some of these posts. Some of your DHs need a major major kick up the arse.