To hate children that correct adults!

[englandsmistress]

My colleague brings her son (9) in to the office today. As they leave I say to him "Happy Christmas, I hope santa brings you the most brilliantest presents"
To which he says, as he rolls his eyes skyward, "it's 'most brilli-ANT'"

and tuts.

Little, shit. He's not even cute

Nope. I can't do it.
Bonsoir, how can you of all people get all hoity about people being patronising?

I'm not getting cross about people being patronising - I'm getting cross about people being patronising to a child and expecting that child to swallow it (being cross, even, that the child doesn't). Very different

Well said Bonsoir.

It is small-talk and someone is trying to be friendly. That is the essence of this very brief conversation.

I think the best lesson a child can learn in this context is how to make polite chat and noises back again.

Ah, I see

Nothing to do with getting down wiv da kids

To swallow it? Someone tring their best to be friendly? Goodness, shouldn't have to swallow that

It is that sort of attitude I find patronising and superior.

I had an embarrassing, jolly uncle who used to do this a lot, so I'm probably responding from an emotionally scarred POV.

People can be trying their best to be friendly and still be patronising and an embarrassment to themselves and others. High time someone lets them know and saves them from themselves!

Life rewards results, not effort... forget that at your peril

It's not cute or funny for a child to correct an adult in a condescending manner.
It's bloody rude
And it's not typical of boys either.
I have 2 boys in yr 5 and 6, they wouldn't dream of behaving like this. They would smile politely.
And I can tell you exactly where this is going too. There is 1 boy we know like this. he's 11 and an unbearable know it all, precocious and rude. He is exceptional academically but has poor social skills imo.
He is unpopular, no doubt about it. his mum,who is also super competitive, has no understanding why he is so unpopular.
I blame her totally.

panettoinydog- I think you are the voice of reason.

OP- YANBU

9 year old boy- you are fully entitled to spurn any friendly comments and embark on a life of 'not suffering fools gladly'. If one day you ever need something from one of those spurned fools, blame your mum if you your acquired lack of charm means you don't get it.

A precocious little brat girl at DS's school last week told me to keep DD quiet!! DD was running along the corridor laughing but it was not during the school day.

Brat - can you get her to pipe down please? (I kid you not, that was the phrase she used!!)

Me - Sorry???

Brat - She's making a lot of noise and people are trying to work.

Me - She's 18months old and it's five o'clock and the only people here are in after school club!!

Your idea and mine of 'results' are very different.

Ingles2 - actually, the boy you talk about will do extremely well in life. He won't be held back by having to "suffer fools" and will find his rightful place in an environment where idiocy is not tolerated and his brilliance serves a purpose.

petitdonkey

Rest assured that child won't have many friends.

Her name wasn't Izzy from Essex by any chance was it?

Bonsoir- 'fraid I disagree. Being personable and able to get on and interact with all sorts in all situations are the skills valued in all professions nowadays.

Maybe Bonsoir, but he won,t have a happy time getting there.
And quite frankly, I much rather my boys were happy and able to empathise and socialise.
Childhood is meant to be fun and carefree Anna.

Childhood is unlikely to be fun and carefree if you are surrounded by idiotic adults and you aren't allowed to say that you find them idiotic.

Totally agree, panettoinydog. Basically, even if she sounded patronising by mistake (which is by no means clear), this is quite, quite clearly a situation where englandsmistress was trying to be nice. Many nine year olds would have picked up on that and been polite even if they felt a bit puzzled and/or squirmy inside. Certainly not indicative that this kid will grow up to be an evil criminal and not the end of the world, but if he was mine I'd be definitely be saying (gently if it was because of delayed social development, more erm forcefully if I thought he should know better) "Oi boy, I think you just came across as rude...."

depends what you mean by 'extremely well in life' surely...nothing wrong with being polite and controlling your condescention..not everything needs to be corrected..sometimes correcting someone makes one look like a prat

Well, my son has Asperger's. So he will tell you if he thinks you are wrong, give extended explanations if you ask why, and not care if he's upset your feelings.
We are working on the concept of white lies, he finds the idea intriguing but challenging.

I have a two good friends who would definitely say 'brillientest'. They are far from idiotic, and really quite lovely, and intelligent in their way - just not in that way. I would never correct them - my life is enriched by having them in it just as they are.

Having said that, I would still correct my own DCs if they said it.

I actually don't find it impolite for a DC to defend themselves against an adult's condescension. I think DCs have a right to respect, and to defend themselves when they are not respected.

The child is at liberty to say the adult is idiotic. Then OP would be the one exercising the social self control not to turn her intellectual guns on said kid and show who exactly is the prat.

ok, managed to spell brilliantest wrong again!!!