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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that a child who believes in Santa beyond 6/7ish is either...

312 replies

santaslayer · 06/12/2010 20:05

a bit naive or a bit dim?

I'm neither a troll nor 2bubs4me so no hunting. Grin

I dont remember ever believing in Santa, and I remember quite a lot from my pre-school years. I knew the size of the Earth, the number of people and the impossibility of the logistics of 'Santa'. I also knew better than to beleive everything my parents said Sad.

My DS is basically the same. I understand that 3yo's believe - it's cute, but I think it's a bit creepy when 8+yo's still do.

But I would never actually criticise a parent for having such deluded sheltered DCs.

OP posts:
thelennox · 06/12/2010 20:27

All together now ... WE BELIEVE IN SANTA!

Run off to your harsh world of reality op, where magic no longer exists. Poor you.

shongololo · 06/12/2010 20:27

Dictionary definition of naive...

too willing to believe that someone is telling the truth, that people's intentions in general are good, or that life is simple and fair. People are often naive because they are young and/or have not had much experience of life

Yep...that sums up my 8 year old. He has a life full of love and security and a wonderful child's imagination. Like others, Id rather have my child naive and innocent than old before his time and cynical with nothing to look forward to except browsing the Argos catalog and saying "I want".

Had a six year old in our Beaver colony that didn't believe. Unlike the OP, the child was pitied for having lost an innocent pleasure so early. And there was a general feeling of annoyance and disdain for the parents who couldn't be bothered to maintain the magic.

MollieO · 06/12/2010 20:27

I think dcs who do continue to believe in Santa are pretty savvy actually. It means they get presents from parents etc and Father Christmas (to give him his correct name). Children who don't believe in FC clearly miss out on getting the FC presents.

Have a [fbear]

BaroqinAroundTheChristmasTree · 06/12/2010 20:28

F*CK - what have I done?

I didn't think DS1 believed any more. I could have sworn last year he said he knew he didn't really exist

I said something to him about it and he looked at me, and I've now got a child in floods of tears. He still believed Xmas Sad

MrManager · 06/12/2010 20:28

I continued up until Year 6, until a classmate asserted that it wasn't true and I suddenly realised it. Damn you, Joel, I was happy in my ignorance!

hohohohobnobsaremyfave · 06/12/2010 20:28

what is it about the " we don't do father christmas" parents that makes them think they are so fucking superior?

ImASlatternGetMeOutOfHere · 06/12/2010 20:29

Have my first Biscuit

I have a G&T 8 year old and he still believes, as do my 5 and 3 year old.

TanteAC · 06/12/2010 20:29

Actually IME kids with a vivid imagination can think up amazing logistics to Santa that would stump a thicker less imaginative child.

They are more willing to suspend disbelief and buy into the magic and the imagery of it all.

I was 10 when I worked it --out-

MadamDeathstare · 06/12/2010 20:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SparkleRat · 06/12/2010 20:30

I believed in Santa until I was ten... :-)

pink4ever · 06/12/2010 20:30

My ds is almost 8 and though I think he has a few doubts(has found a few of the larger presents that were difficult to hide) he still wants to believe and I am happy to encourage him. He def still believes in the tooth fairy(lost his first teeth this year) and said it must be magic cos he didnt even wake up when she put the money under his pillow!. Would be horrified if my dd(4) or ds(18 months) didnt believe!.

TanteAC · 06/12/2010 20:30

out

Am thick after all Blush

MadamDeathstare · 06/12/2010 20:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TanteAC · 06/12/2010 20:32

SparkleRat are you a genius too Grin

thelennox · 06/12/2010 20:32

Plus, older brothers and sisters keep it all going for the younger ones. I mean my ds is nearly 10 and still believes, but I think he has had his doubts. But he would never ever want to spoil the magic for his wee sister 5 and brother 1. So he keeps believing. Bless him. Just the way I want it.

Needanewname · 06/12/2010 20:33

Marine, I think what most people are pissed off with the OP about is that she has declared that any child over the age of 8 who still believes is dim or naive.

Whether her intention or not, she comes across as feeling superior as she and her child are obviously more intelligent.

We had a discussion the other day with DD1 (nearly 7) and her friend (similar age) who both still believe (we were watching The Santa Clause) and thought it silly that some people didn;t belive. They told me its obvious how he delivers all the presents - he's magic!

vmcd28 · 06/12/2010 20:35

Baroqin tell us what you said so we can help to get you out of that hole and make your ds smile again :(

bellastella · 06/12/2010 20:37

If you don't 'believe', you don't receive. Everyone likes to receive, so only the smartest believe. Grin

clippityclop · 06/12/2010 20:37

My dd is 9 and still beleive in Father Christmas, the tooth fairy and tht there might just be fairies at the bottom of the garden, and so does her sister 6. There's a part of me who still believes in ths wonder of it all, passed on to me by my parents. It's harmless fun, we are not dim in the least but simply have good imaginations. Bah Humbug to non-beleivers!

KarmaDevil · 06/12/2010 20:38

YABtotallyfuckingU!!! My dd is 7, she isn't dim but she is naive. And I like her that way, she's 7 FGS! I believed until I was 11.

Personally I think you're the weirdo for not believing YOUNG children should have magic in their lives. I think it's very sad that you won't allow your children to believe beyond the age of 6 and I feel very sorry for them to have such a mean mummy. Xmas Sad

MarineIguana · 06/12/2010 20:39

I have to confess I get that gut reaction too - that they must be a bit clueless. But I try to suppress it (would not say it unprompted!) and on reflection I think it's more their parents who are naive. Declaring "my 8yo/9yo still believes 100%" - I bet they don't. They tell you they do because they know you want them to. They've probably either sussed it, or are a bit confused that someone is so intent on insisting on these impossibilities - while at the same time having fun with it. It's possible to be in a state of knowing something isn't real in one sense, while wholeheartedly embracing it.

PaisleyLeaf · 06/12/2010 20:41

Do you have a "6/7ish" year old OP?
It's really not that old. Children don't believe for very long. Say if they stop believing at 6 - that's only be about 3 years of Santa (they're too little to think much about it all when they're toddlers).

That book looks really good.

BaroqinAroundTheChristmasTree · 06/12/2010 20:41

MArine - my DS1 has just cried real, proper tears after I f*cked up a little while ago. He's 10. He really did believe 100% Xmas Sad

MadamDeathstare · 06/12/2010 20:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hannahsaunt · 06/12/2010 20:43

Dim and thick is unkind. Mine have been brought up with the story of St Nicholas and know that Santa was real and his spirit lives on in kindness, thoughtfulness and giving - understanding that children aren't judged by Santa, that you can't ask from Santa and expect to receive, that there are lots of children out there (not least in the UK) who don't get at Christmas and it's not because they were naughty for Santa ... and they are in a very diverse school where there are many non-Santa traditions so it's kind of hard to string it along. It doesn't mean that Christmas isn't magical or exciting or intriguing or entrancing.

And ds2 (nearly 8) had a long conversation essentially with himself the other day about the casting of the elves in Harry Potter and whether or not the same elf had played Dobby in HP7 as before Smile.