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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that a child who believes in Santa beyond 6/7ish is either...

312 replies

santaslayer · 06/12/2010 20:05

a bit naive or a bit dim?

I'm neither a troll nor 2bubs4me so no hunting. Grin

I dont remember ever believing in Santa, and I remember quite a lot from my pre-school years. I knew the size of the Earth, the number of people and the impossibility of the logistics of 'Santa'. I also knew better than to beleive everything my parents said Sad.

My DS is basically the same. I understand that 3yo's believe - it's cute, but I think it's a bit creepy when 8+yo's still do.

But I would never actually criticise a parent for having such deluded sheltered DCs.

OP posts:
Horton · 08/12/2010 14:54

I don't think there's any need for telling lies, particularly. When they say 'but how could he do X, Y or Z?' you just say 'I don't know, how do you think he does it?'

A child who believes it all will happily ascribe any inconsistencies to magic and a child who doesn't will tell you eventually (if they won't or can't tell you they think it's not true, you have bigger problems than the existence or otherwise of FC, IMO). Far nicer to have the magic and gradually grow out of it, as children do, than never to have believed at all.

FWIW, me and my brother found our Christmas presents one year by accident. We were 8 and 7. We rationalised it by deciding that FC had almost certainly dropped them off early and carried on believing happily for another year or two. Neither of us was especially dim though I expect we were quite naive.

vmcd28 · 08/12/2010 16:40

I'm fairly certain this thread was started purely to wind people up.
Pathetic, really.

pantomimecow · 08/12/2010 17:09

My friend who is a consultant in child and adolescent psychiatry doesn't do santa with her kids

jaffacakeaddict · 08/12/2010 17:11

Is it possible that many of the kids aged over 6/7 know that Santa doesn't exist but just don't want to admit that to their parents because they are afraid they wont get presents if they say there isn't a Santa?

linziluv · 08/12/2010 17:15

I believed until I was 10! And I was a very bright child! I just trusted my parents implicitly! Never did me any harm!

MarineIguana · 08/12/2010 20:08

I'm not like that LeQueen - I can't be doing with those "best friends" parents. I do believe in respecting my DC's intelligence, that's all.

In fact I think it's the opposite of what you say - we get loads of fun out of little things at home with DS, we are sciency and love going to museums etc and for DS, science and nature are "magical" and full of wonderment (as they are for me and DP). We don't need something like santa to bring excitement and wonderment - we're fine with it being a bit of fun that's also pretty unlikely.

It's funny how defensive the santa-pushers on here are - feeling a need to write off anyone who has doubts about it as joyless, ruining the magic of christmas, not letting their child be a child - quite harsh!

We do santa - we talk about him, we do the stocking, we talk about his worldwide trip, we put out the mince pie, sherry and carrot (and I actually still love that part even though I never really believed). It's just that I know DS isn't really that taken in (from the things he says) and that his very logistical mind is busy picking holes in the whole thing. It's still fun! It is much like enjoying a play, or DS's obsession with aliens or yetis. He's interested and enthusiastic but part of it is all to do with mulling over how real it is - and if he asks outright I could not lie to his face.

I like christmassyness, I like the lights, the food, the sparkly stuff. What I don't like so much is the acquisitiveness and consumerism, and that's what santa is all about.

But we don't all sit in our cheerless, gloomy tree-free front rooms going "Of course there's no santa you stupid child, and you can wipe that festive grin off your face." Hmm

mungo8 · 08/12/2010 20:22

My 9 year old still 100% believes in santa and the christmas fairy that brings the advent choc and little gift in her advent boxe everyday. I wouldn't have it any other way she isn't dim at all just likes the magic and the fantastic feelings that this brings. Every year since reception some child has told her that santa doesn't exist we have managed everytime to keep the magic alive. So we have lied to her and her brother I do not have an issue with that I hope they carry the lie on with the same amount of creativity we have worked so hard at.

Last christmas she had been an absolute horror and her little brother who was in nursery came home and told her that if she wasn't good then santa would bring her potatoes instead of presents we didn't say anything well christmas morning she came into us and was really really worried about going to the lounge as she might have just a sack of potatoes bless her the look of relief when she discovered she did have presents. I hope we can keep it going for a couple more years. I do think it is really sad that children do not have this magic in their lives, they grow up so quickly. So why can they not have this one fantastic magical story bought to life once a year naive no just a childhood of imagination fantastic memories and a magic that will only happen for a short amount of time in childhood. Keep santa alive.

northerngirl41 · 08/12/2010 22:25

You know that people who don't believe in Santa don't get presents? So you're not get a stocking this year!!!

Mine's well and truly on its way because I have been a good girl and fervently believe in Santa! [fsmile}

missbea · 13/11/2011 23:16

I'm so relieved to read all the posts about children that still believe. Thank goodness! My 9yo DD still believes and I was beginning to think I might have to burst that bubble for her - which I would hate to do, as she enjoys the magic and excitement of Christmas so much. Oh, and btw, she's not dim, not creepy, but is probably naive, and for that I'm very grateful.

DizzyDummy · 14/11/2011 00:15

My DS is very bright, maybe a touch naive (which in my book is a good thing for a 7 year old) and definitely believes in Santa, why would I want to take that magic away from him before it's necessary. Lets kids be kids and not little adults.

CheerfulYank · 14/11/2011 00:32

I stopped believing quite early (4 or 5) and wish I hadn't. Later on I thought, well, if it were possible to stop time and parallel universes and all that, but by that time my mother had already confirmed that he didn't exist.

What's the harm, really?

voddiekeepsmesane · 14/11/2011 00:33

7yo DS still beleives though I do think things are starting to 'unsettle' him in regards to the whole story. He has a very logic mind :)

Shame on the OP though. If I can keep as much fantasy and fun in my sons childhood for as long as possible I will. Though having said that maybe by the time he gets to senior school I should let him know Wink

msbeatrice · 14/11/2011 00:54

I believed for ages - I rationalized that mum and dad couldn't afford all the presents that we got, so it must be Santa! I wasn't dim, possibly naive but not in a bad way. Plus, I think I contributed to my little sister's belief in Santa for a long time after I found out the truth, by writing 'letters' to her from Santa, carefully using my left hand and telling her all about how the elves were doing! Hopefully it didn't damage her too much. I think the only thing I would be a little bit worried about was if my child believed when they were starting secondary school. I would probably tell them before then - but not because I thought it was 'weird', just because I would worry that they would be bullied.

Fo0ffyShmooffer · 14/11/2011 01:10

Just realised I contributed to this thread last year so I'll not bother repeating myself. Grin

See waaaaaaaaay above ^^^

flyingspaghettimonster · 14/11/2011 01:17

Adults believe in religion... why shouldn't Santa be considered equally plausible to a child?

SlinkingOutsideInSocks · 14/11/2011 01:27

Wow, bump-o-rama...

Missbea - why are you so relieved and thinking you'd have to burst bubbles - you must have had to hunt this thread out to even discover the state of affairs! Grin

my2centsis · 14/11/2011 03:05

the words, rude, negative, judgmental horrid witch come to mind

LuckyRocketshipUnderpants · 14/11/2011 03:30

The thread revives! Santa must be watching over MN to see who has been naughty and who has been nice.

pigletmania · 14/11/2011 08:04

here have a Biscuit. Bah humbug!

Facebookisforlosers · 14/11/2011 08:06

Yes Santa's naive but half the world believing in a God of some sort is really grown up. Hmm

CheerfulYank · 14/11/2011 08:09

I am naive I suppose, going by that definition. People are mostly good and the world is simple. So there you are. :)

exoticfruits · 14/11/2011 08:10

Why do people trawl back for old threads. This is nearly a year old! Better to start a new one.

TheHumancatapult · 14/11/2011 08:13

Well I'm quite happy to say my younger dc must be naieve then as they both believe .

Helped by the fan Santa at our local zoo who knows names their friends names their siblings names and what they did last week

They not twigged that he is one of the zoo keepers and since werethere so regularly kids pretty well known

Trills · 14/11/2011 08:17

OLD THREAD

justonemorethread · 14/11/2011 08:17

I didn't really believe in santa from between the ages of 8 and 11 but I wanted to believe so my whole family kept up the pretence as I was the youngest and that would have been the end of the magic! I'm sure they must have realised I didn't really believe, otherwise they were the ones who were dim!

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