to have refused to allow a woman DP slept with to stay in out house?

[winnybella]

Sounds more dramatic than it really is.

DP has a colorful past, no proper relationship before he met me, lots of one night stands and short romances.

Few days ago he said that a girl that he knew long time ago is coming to our town for a few days and has asked him whether she could stay in our place.

I asked DP what 'knew' meant exactly and he blushed and said 'well...'.

So I said that I would prefer she didn't as I don't really fancy having someone he slept with in my house- not a huge deal, of course, just it wouldn't be very nice for me. If it was an emergency of some kind, than, yes, ok, but as it is I would rather she didn't.

He said, fine, I think he felt a bit silly for even asking.

I was just wondering whether IWBU? And what would you do?

Posted too early!
Gah!

Anyway, it's a recipe for disaster & even if nothing went on, you op, do not feel comfortable, otherwise you wouldn't be posting this in the first place.

I just clicked to see why she wanted to stay in your outhouse [worried]

CI - yeah... weird innit

This is a tricky one and everyone has a good point. My dh also has a colourful past because we are both from the same small village unfortunately I know a few of them. He had never really had a serious relationship until he met me. We've been married now for nearly 10 years and have 3 kids. In that time I have never doubted my trust for him. He has gone for evenings out and there is one who is local that is quite often out too, but I know he doesn't fancy her anymore. But I don't want them to stay over either and I wouldn't ask my dh if an ex of mine could stay over. YANBU to feel this way!

YANBU.

Not because of them having shagged, but because she is a cheeky mare trying to bum a free room for 5 days - which is ages, especially in December when people are trying to get ready for Christmas.

If she is going to be 'in town', then that implies that she is either working where you live, or coming to visit some other people. In which case she can either get a hotel or stay with her actual friends or family.

I agree with Mether (and will on every thread from now on)

Mether how bloody weird is that?

YABU. I just don't get why the fact he had sex with her a long time ago makes it difficult for you to look at her.

Of the couples who came to our wedding, most had one partner who had shagged either me or dh, and one couple scored the double... (It was a small wedding, before anyone starts shouting slag at me!)

Personally, I love that we know one another's histories, and that our friendships have weathered years of growth and change.

YANBU

not an issue of trust, but i just think it would make me feel weird! i'm uncomfortable enough when other people come to stay let alone a random unknown that a DH might have slept with! things are stressful enough at this time of year without having to put up some woman from the past.

i may be biased against this since our house is so tiny it's always a nightmare when people come to stay even if i love them (best friend's kitchen went on fire, she stayed with us for a few days and it was horrible, she hated me and i hated her by the end of it, it's claustraphobic enough in a one-bathroom two-bedroom house with 2 adults and 2 kids, nevermind someone else and her boyfriend sleeping on the sofa. nightmare!)