to not want DS to be weighed and measured at school

[choufleur]

Got letter from DS's school today to say that he will be weighed and measured (obviously along with all other kids in his class) to see if he's a healthy weight.

I think it's a completely pointless thing to do. And one that could potentially contribute to healthy children having issues about their weight.

AIBU to not let him be weighed and measured?

"DCs don't see standing on the scales as an issue-by making a fuss and not giving consent you are making it into an issue"

Not necessarily. If they didn't get involved in the first place, you wouldn't be. Its only the fact that they are already making an issue of it enough to do it in schools that you are forced by default in to making an issue out of it. If its such a non-issue, they wouldn't be weighed at all. The government is making an issue of it by introducing it into schools. Kids may or may not pick up on that, but if they didn't do it in the first place, it would definitely be a non-issue.

I hope that makes sense. Basically, I dont see why opting out parents should be "blamed" for making it an issue when them keeping BMI in doctors surgeries would make it even less of an issue.

"I don't allow scales at home."
Why?
In our house it isn't "we don't allow scales" It is more a case of we don't need scales.

Well I'm undecided. In principle I don't want
weighed/measured as I just don't see how it is going to help children who are actually very under/over weight. If the problem is that their parent don't care then a letter is not going to change that. However I don't want DS to be singled out as the kid not being weighed/measured.

It depends on the age of the boy or girl.

At my bulimic peak the prospect of being weighed at school would have sent me in to a flat spin of panic, probably resulting in a sharp and dangerous drop in body weight. Followed by a huge over-eating spate.

Not very healthy at all. This was at an older age, however, from 14 onwards.

I don't weigh myself these days and try and avoid anyone else weighing me. The consequences of triggering a renewed eating disorder are too painful. My kids are weighed annually at their asthma check-ups, and occasionally at home if we're remotely interested. As they're both slim and fit I'm usually not.

I'm nearly 5' 8" and a size ten/twelve. I can see with my own eyes if I have a muffin top and need to watch what I'm eating.

We are living in a society where childhood obesity (and in adults too) is on the increase. This means long term health risks - heart disease, diabetes, cirrhosis due to stored fat to name but a few. Some children who are on the large side will grow out of it as they get older, but a lot won't. The term "puppy fat" is outdated and misleading. One cannot tell which overweight children will become overweight adults, but the evidence states that most do.

I have this theory that most parents who don't want their DCs weighed know they are a bit / a lot overweight and don't want to be officially told as it seems like a direct criticism of their parenting skills. Some children eat very healthy diets, just adult sized portions, and that can lead to them being overweight. It is great that so many children do lead an active life, but if they are still eating more calories than they need they will still be overweight despite the exercise.

I think that some parents need to be told their children are overweight. They are not doing their children a favour if they are consigning them to a reduced life expectancy.

Sorry if this sounds harsh. It just needs to be said IMO.

One of my friends had DD weighed - she is overweight, and she was furious at the letter telling her so on the basis that she eats healthily and does a lot of exercise.
Ham sandwiches for lunch are healthy, but 2 rounds (ie 4 slices of bread and filling) plus cake and fruit is too much for a 6 year old, as is a plate of pasta the same size as mine!. I just kept quiet, I like my friend!

yanbu

parenting by proxy govt bollocks, about time schools were used for what they were fucking meant to.

i take it this would be done during lesson time?

all becuase they can't be fucked investing in parents - oh no...what they will do, is do it for you, state control bullshit bollocks

I think it's an issue already (with or without scales) that Ds has come home saying that "we're being weighed to see if we're fat". I'm sure the teachers haven't said that but it's what a group of 4/5 years olds have understood.

I know how much Ds weighs and how tall he is as he stands on the scales sometimes when DH goes to the nurse to have the dressing on his leg changed, and measures himself. I'm not deluded thanks purple.

what would the world be like if governments took the line that people can't do anything for themselves - therefore they will do it for you.

what would a place of employment be like if a boss said all their staff were incapable?

they dont do that - what they do is offer you training and advice to do your role properly

its not like there was a set of instructions up mi vadge when i popped them out " congratulations its a boy ...here;s the instructions"

"Ham sandwiches for lunch are healthy, but 2 rounds (ie 4 slices of bread and filling) plus cake and fruit is too much for a 6 year old, as is a plate of pasta the same size as mine!."

Blimey I'm not surprised she is lardy!
DD is 10 and I would be happy if she could eat one round of sandwiches plus a few extras. She is too skinny BTW.

But some parents are extremely deluded. I am sure if you have a quiet look in the playground you can spot the grossly overweight parents collecting a grossly overweight child. The trouble with a public health approach (which is what this is) is that it is the best thing to manage a population, but not neccesarily the best way to manage an individual, which is why this friction exists.

What do you all think is the best way of tackling childhood obesity amongst families who don't seem to notice or care?

Those who don't care are not going to be made to care with a letter and some pointers though.

Anyway - I'm off for a bit to go and eat some very unhealthy chinese food.

Purple - have you read any other posts? Try reading the one I just wrote and give it 5 minutes thought.

I don't have a child that is under or over weight. I have no axe to grind. I just think it is wrong to do this in school.

Children who are weighed elsewhere don't need repeat weighing at school I agree, but how are they to be identified? And I agree that those who don't care will probably just be pissed off at a letter telling them their DC is on a "high percentile" but at least they have been told.
Seriously though, how else can the problem be managed effectively?

"What do you all think is the best way of tackling childhood obesity amongst families who don't seem to notice or care"

Not sure. Through GP's, mainly. If these obese people never cross the path of a GP's office, it might be that its not as unhealthy as they say. But I dont believe that, I think being obese is unhealthy and the majority will find themselves in front of their GP.

But the main point is, regardless of whether this is the case or of who brings it to their attention - they will only change if they WANT to change. If an obese person goes to their GP, gets a pasting for needing to lose weight, gets handed a leaflet or referred to free Weight Watchers or a gym intro or whatever they are doing these days, but dont actually want to change and lose weight, they wont. Doesn't matter which government agency gets involved.

Same with their kids - if parents either dont believe there is a problem or dont want to make the lifestyle changes necessary, they wont, and the child will be obese. Same with other bad parenting decisions.

I think its important that those who WANT to make change get access to the right kind of support, and that they concentrate on making more people WANT to change by educating people about the dangers of obesity.

Leonie, believe it or not i don't judge. But through my job I have seen countless people have their lives shortened needlessly because of lifestyle choices. As an adult you make that choice yourself, but children don't, they are influenced by their parents.

I have just spent the afternoon in a liver transplant clinic watching people being told they can't have a liver because of a variety of factors including diabetes, alcohol. I think so many people underestimate the risk of developing diabetes and what it can actually do to you. Its not just about having to go easy on the cakes.

Tattydevine you are quite right - people do need educating about the dangers of obesity. Thats why children are weighed in school and the parents told if their DCs are overweight...

I can't think that any DC would have an issue about standing on scales-unless the parent has made it an issue.

UNIVERSAL PARENTING CLAsSES up on reciept of child benefit ( assuming it remains a universal benefit)