To think Mil should provide enough bedding

[Fluffymonster]

For my kids when they go to stay?

We have two children, aged 20mths, and 3yrs - they go and stay with their grandparents once every 6-8wks. We send up a travel cot for DD2, and blankets and a sleeping bag, and DD1 usually takes her own duvet and pillow. Packing that lot fills up most of the boot, never mind suitcase too. Dd1 does however, sleep on an infatable bed that they provide.

Just seems a bit odd that if I forget to send a pillow for DD1, they haven't even got a spare for her - she has to sleep on a pillow case that's filled with folded towels.

They are well looked after and entertained while there, I just find it a bit strange that they expect my kids to bring their own bedding every time.

My Bil's little girl, their oldest grandchild, stays with them once a week, and she has her own furnished bedroom. Not that I expect the same for my kids - we live further away and see them less, while Bil lives with them, and has shared custody of his daughter, so she is round there more often.

Anyone else think it's a bit odd, to invite the gc to go and visit, and then not provide them with any bedding?

yes i do think that's odd. a pillow from asda doesn't cost much. surely they have thought of buying a spare one so it's there? anyway, to save it happening again, could you buy one and leave it there?

Sounds odd but in your situation I'd agree with booyhoo, just buy what they need and keep it there.

Just arrange to buy extra stuff (sleeping bag, pillows, duvet) yourself & keep it there. Then all u transport is the travel cot.

I think it's odd but we had friends in Australia who expected us to bring our own sheets and pillows when we visited them !! They in turn did the same. She said it was to save washing sheets.

I hated it - I mean how much work is it to throw sheets in the washing machine.

beautyspot -we've got friends visiting on Oz, soon. You've given me an idea .

Really, though. Damn the reciprocation, that's fecking unbelievable. I'm just thinking of the weight all that stuff.

You can get a 2 pillows for a fiver from M&S online at the moment. They're not amazing but they're fine. Agree with the others. YANBU but it will be easier just to buy a few cheap things than lugging it all over every time you visit!

do they have a severe lack of storage in their home, maybe its that?
although i would have thought like if you visit and bils dd is not there that your dd could have used her room, rather than bringing all own stuff?

I think it's just the way some people are I ahve 2 spare duvets and loads of pillows and no one hardly ever stays. We don't ever stay at FIL's but if we did we would have to take our own as although he has a 4 bedroom house he just has one duvet and 2 pillows for the bed that he sleeps in.

Thanks for the replies everyone. It's not a big deal, it's just a little strange and I wasn't sure if it was 'just me' or not.

Firawla - It's not a storage issue, as they have a fairly spacious 4-bedroom house, and majority of the time it's only Mil and Fil in the master bedroom, and Bil is in another double bedroom, upstairs. Bil's daughter stays for a couple of nights a week, in 'her' single bedroom. When she isn't there, DD2's travel cot is put up in there, but this visit Bil's daughter was also staying, so DD2, plus cot, was put in the 'playroom' downstairs.

That leaves another bedroom that's completely unoccupied most of the time, that DD1 was put up in, in her inflatable bed. (In case you're wondering why not just put her in the bed that's already in the room unused - it's because DD1 is asked which one she'd prefer to sleep in and she chooses to go in the inflatable one.)

What I don't understand is, why couldn't they have just used the pillow that was on the bed in the spare bedroom iyswim, when DD1 needed one?

I feel like I'm missing something here...obviously there is some logical reason that I'm just not getting lol.

Oh well!

It does sound a bit strange. I, personally, would "borrow" at least some bedding from another, absent guest (the other GD).

Perhaps you could get some of these vacuum bags, for bringing up the new, spare bedding to your PIL, and then leave the bedding there, all vacuumed up. Packing the car issue and PILs' potential objections over space constraints neatly sidestepped in one go.

If they object at this point, you will know it's about something else.

I don't have a tonne of spare bedding to be honest - got one set for the spare room that I have to "turn around" if a succession of people come to stay (sure my MIL thinks I'm well skanky cos it's always the same bedding set on there whenever she comes!). I don't even have masses of duvet sets for my own bedroom to be honest - one on, one in the wash, one mouldering in the ironing pile staring menacingly at me.

Perhaps she thought your kids might sleep better in stuff that smells and looks familiar to them?

I have three kids and when I go and stay with my very good friend (who I have known since I was 3) she expects me to take my own bedding.

Her and her DH have no kids but a 6 bed house - every tine we go she asks me to take kids sleeping bags/pillows (fair enough) but last time she was a bit crestfallen that OH and I hadn't taken out own duvet/duvet cover/pillows etc