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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be upset that my dd age 4 came out of school with half her hair cut off!!: (

164 replies

armani · 24/11/2010 21:11

GRRRRRRRR! just need to rant! my dd has beautiful long blonde hair,today she came out of school and somelittle *** has cut her hair!!!!at the front it is awful cut down to the root and at the back her pony tail has been mostly cut off :(

im so upset for my dd, why would another child do this?

OP posts:
Mspontipine · 24/11/2010 23:56

"its taken me four years to grow her hair to the length it was"

Sorry.. who grew the hair???Confused

But I know what you mean Wink

confuddledDOTcom · 25/11/2010 00:17

I cut my eldest's hair once, I think it was enough that she'll not do it!

I tried to take her T-shirt off but her hair was tangled in the button. I teased it for awhile to try and get it out but it wouldn't budge. I had to get the scissors out and cut it free. She was devastated (hair to her waist, now up her chest) and I had to get it cut to tidy it up. Fortunately her hair grows fast so it's back to normal now. Her nursery teacher told me off! She has gorgeous hair and she said I shouldn't have had her hair cut lol

EcoLady · 25/11/2010 00:58

My boss's DD lost half a pigtail during her first week of school. It was cut above the top bobble, so wasn't spotted until her mum undid her hair at bedtime. Shock

SonicMiddleAge · 25/11/2010 01:11

I also found the "it's taken me four years to grow this hair" comment a bit Hmm - she's a girl not a dolly for you to play dress up on. Also find it telling your OP never even mentions whether your dd was upset or not, just your feelings.

MadamDeathstare · 25/11/2010 03:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YeahBut · 25/11/2010 03:45

OP, they do it because they are children and don't understand that you can't cut hair and "fix" it back again. As you can see from the posts here, it's incredibly common. Are you absolutely sure that another child did it and not your dd? Come to think of it, both my dds cut their own hair off when they were four. In each case, they had safety scissors and were on their own for about 2 minutes. Crafty little blighters.
OP, take your dd to the hairdressers and have a strong G&T when you get home. Think of it as a rite of passage!

emptyshell · 25/11/2010 08:10

Those totally plastic scissors that don't normally even cut paper properly can, on occasions cut school jumpers in the hands of a determined pair of boys - as my younger brother and his friend found out experimenting in school one day.

My younger brother also managed to wedge blu tack up his nose and get his head stuck sticking out of a bus window... you've got it all to come.

Kids and scissors and hair are always an inviting combination. You can supervise - but you cannot watch all thirty constantly, you're always jumping between kids who need help, turning to see who's patting you on the leg because they're finished, seeing who's come to the door from another class and it only takes a second for someone to decide to see what happens when they put their fringe in the scissors.

Taught a year 4 kid who came in one morning with a rather sharp and snazzy new hair cut - I just made the usual "ooh you've had your hair cut - nice" noises and then got the story from mum at parents evening - sibling hairdressing on a Saturday morning.

expatinscotland · 25/11/2010 09:32

Pixie cuts look lovely, but I prefer their long, flowing tresses Wink.

Besides then I can get away with going longer between trimming it if it's already long.

AitchTwoOh · 25/11/2010 09:34

lol at 'snazzy haircut', emptyshell. that's what dd2 has. Grin

and yes yes yes expat, i do like long, flowing tresses. i get excellent haircut value out of dd1 thanks to the spiral curls. takes ages for them to actually grow downwards, iykwim?

Quenelle · 25/11/2010 09:40

I would be upset but agree that you can make it into a positive experience for DD by taking her to the hairdressers and making a big deal out of getting a new hairdo. I think girls look adorable with a little bob, with a cute hairband to cover the front until a fringe has grown in.

When I was little I dipped my hair in gloss paint, then tried to wash it out, with obvious consequences Blush. My mum had to take me for an emergency haircut at the local salon and I ended up going back to school with a gorgeous new hairdo. I was chuffed to bits.

Sandinmyshoes · 25/11/2010 09:56

In amongst the anger/upset... don't forget to take a picture for when you can see the funny side... and to display as a poster at her 18th Birthday party...

DooinMeCleanin · 25/11/2010 09:57

Dd1 once had her hair cut with plastic 'pretend' scissors, by my niece, who like another poster genuinely thought she'd be able to do a good job of it.

Dd2 has very recently scalped herself given herself a fetching fringe. It will grow back. It's something they all do, unfortunatly. I can see why you would be upset, but seriously, in the grand scheme of things, it's just one of those things.

hatsybatsy · 25/11/2010 10:07

am in the 'rite of passage' camp - it happens to all children surely? maybe not quite as drastic as your example but still.

am slightly bemused by all these "I'd be devastated/livid" type comments. They're children - it was probably a game and it is only hair - it will grow back. No mention that the child herself is upset so surely we can all relax on this?

AitchTwoOh · 25/11/2010 10:13

i must say when dh and i say dd2's hair we really couldn't stop laughing. not in an amused way, it was hysterics. not a great way of showing our disapproval to dd1 but we were so SHOCKED.

it is upsetting, in the sense that it's not what you want to happen, and one is allowed a small tantrum. but you do get over it. (although i am actually shaking with laughter just thinking about RIDICULOUS dd2 looked running round the house with huge clumps of hair dropping out of her head.)

90 seconds. i swear. Grin

JennyRobyn · 25/11/2010 12:00

My DD Cut a huge chunk from her hair when she was 3 or 4, She took off half her fringe and the left side.

Her hair was all one length and would have it clippd back during the day but at night we took clips out. Asking why she did it she said her fringe was in her eyes.

I tidied up best i could and waited for it to grow back. A few months later she took the scissors and hacked all the newly grown hair off again!

I threatened to take her to get it cut short if she was hell bent on cutting it herself.

She started crying as she didn't want to be a boy!!

She's never dared to try again.

I was upset the first time but the second time it was a case of "it will grow back, even if you do look like a numpty!! Grin".

I would be mortified if DD came home from school without half her hair but She is now 7 So would expect classmates to know better

Acanthus · 25/11/2010 12:07

Livid? Devastated? Gutted?

It's HAIR people, not a life threatening injury!

OP she'll be fine Smile

TaperJeanGirl · 25/11/2010 12:20

This scares me, both of my girls have fairly long nice hair, dd1s took FOREVER to grow and I would def cry if another child cut her hair, I dont care if its vain, I like their hair, and dont want it hacked off, I would be angry at the school too, I try and clip/tie as much of their hair back as possible partly for this and partly to try and deter nits.
So sorry for your dd, hopefully she will like her new haircut once its sorted, and fingers crossed it grows fast!

TaperJeanGirl · 25/11/2010 12:23

Hopefully your dd isnt too bothered though, my almost 4 year old wouldnt care if she were bald, in fact,a few months ago her sister helpfully pushed her off a chair, knocking out a side tooth, she looks like a pirate, but isnt in the slightest bit bothered, I, on the other hand, cried Blush

thereisalightanditnevergoesout · 25/11/2010 12:29

I'd be furious and I'd want to speak to teacher school etc. Not sure, but I think a while ago a young woman had her hair hacked off in the street as a prank (I don't think I'm imagining it) and I think she sued.

Being in a school the motivation is probably different, but I'm sure legally, if it happened to an adult - it must consitute some sort of assault (I could be wrong - and I'm happy to be corrected).

LightlyKilledCrunchyFrog · 25/11/2010 12:31

Assault? Seriously? You want to criminalise a 4 year old for playing?

thereisalightanditnevergoesout · 25/11/2010 12:33

Did I say that?

nameymcnamechange · 25/11/2010 12:35

I am not saying this in a yawn, not this topic again way but we have had this thread at least three or four times already this year - just to let you know that you are not alone! It is incredibly common and unfortunately little children just can't seem resist the temptation once they get their little paws on the scissors.

For everyone who can't understand how the teacher didn't notice: have you ever tried to keep an eye on 30 children at once?

scottishmummy · 25/11/2010 12:39

oh pipe down a mishap isnt assault.4yo below age of criminal responsibility no charge could be levied.unlikely it was malicious more likely high jinks and bad judgement

whilst id be upset i wouldn't be litigious

thereisalightanditnevergoesout · 25/11/2010 12:40

right - my post said,

'if it happened to an adult'

BrokenBananaTantrum · 25/11/2010 12:42

I can see why you would be upset but I do think that you just have to accept that this sort of thing happens regularly.

Don't make a big deal of it with DD as you don't want her to start being worried about how she looks at her age. Agree with others - just have a nice bob cut and get some headbands. Please don't make her feel concious (sp) about her hair. She will have enough of that in 10 years time.