to wonder why playpens seem so unpopular

[Housewife2010]

Why do playpens seem so unfashionable? We have one & I wouldn't be without it. I have somewhere completely safe in which to put my 18 month old while I answer the door or do a few jobs. He's never left in there for long. I seem to be in a minority though as so few of the other parents I know use them. How do you manage without one?

Monkeytoo - I understood your example.

i dont understand how you managed to interject bf and be offended at sfa. a massive digression

i compared this tothis

i think even the most easily offended may see a passing similarity. oh and one of them is agricultural too

christ grab yer boobs in case you are offended

They are a bit agricultural, even called pens like sheep pens etc.

We call ours the baby pod as it is a bit spacey looking and has a mesh lid to put on top to keep the biteys out.

I use leashes as well if called for and used to encourage DS1 oh his dog imitations.

Just do whatever works, why give a fuck if people disagree/disapprove, their opinions are not really relevant when it coles to you, your home and your kids

Someone said earlier that they would not even cage their dog. Well, interestingly, dog experts strongly recommend that you do. Dogs (when properly crate trained) don't see their cages (crates) as a prison, but as a safe place where they can be in peace.

So if the child actually likes to be in their playpen, what's the problem? My own mum said that I was always sitting in some corner doing my own thing, so I would probably have been very happy in the playpen too.

You don't like it because it's confinement? well, unless you keep all the doors and gates open so your kid can wander wherever he/she wants, so is a room, your house, your yard, a playground etc. A bit bigger than a pen, but nonetheless.

I have just got a playpen, it means I can now cook in peace without DS being under my feet in a tiny kitchen, going through the cupboards and pulling all the pots and pans out onto the floor.
I can also go to the toilet without him trying to put his hands in the bowl, bump his head on the sink etc
I only have a small house and the pen takes up most of the living room so he's got a lot of roaming space but no sharp edges everywhere for him to run headfirst into

I dont understand why 'answering the door' is such a troublesome interruption for so many Mums.

My doorbell almost never rings. Friends/family would always phone first before coming over, so I would be prepared for that. The only other reason it would ring would be salespeople, who I would ignore anyway.

Also, the whole 'it keeps them amused when I'm doing the houswork' arguement, I cant relate to. When I was at home with DD, I made it clear to DP that just because I was in the house did not mean that the burden of housework would automatically fall on me. My job was looking after DD, that's what I did, not washing, cleaning etc.

I have vivid memories of my own mother being too busy cleaning to play with me when I was little and I swore I'd never be that kind of Mum to my DCs.

Yes but if you are on your own then the housework doesfall to you and it can be a right PITA to do it with a toddler hanging from you

darleneconnor - I too have been sat here feeling unpopular as my doorbell never rings!

I haven't got a doorbell.

And the only people who knock on my door are Jehovah's Witnesses.

Don't have one due to space, would like one.

I had one for DS and it was invaluable when he was little - especially as I had dogs and didn't want to have them constantly licking his face whenever I put him on the ground. I made a little nest in there when he was really little and he would sleep in there for ages.
It's far safer than letting them scamper about when you are trying to cook too.

do it when they are asleep?

'do it when they are asleep?'

Not a chance. That's when I get to put my feet up!!

Darlene - we have family business and get deliveries to our home fairly frequently. Quite difficult to juggle parcels, two ll- month twins in a town house (with front door downstairs) so my travel cot is a godsend for the couple of minutes I need to pop away when this happens. Their safety is paramount and they actually don't mind sitting in their little den rolling around with their toys!

Mrsmackie I've used one - I think they're great, they work for some kids and not for others, some mums and not others. You know how safe your house is and what risks you're happy to take when doing things around the house. We do what makes life easier for us, no matter what it is. You know your kids are happy being in one - if they weren't you wouldn't use one. I think we should all accept our differences in parenting style and those of us that use them or have used them, shouldn't feel the need to justify it. But we equally shouldn't have to feel like we're doing something wrong.

Personal choice, but I have always thought that kids should be allowed to explore. I would be furious if anyone put my kid in one and am sick to the back teeth of inlaws 'suggesting' so thoughtfully (over and over and over) that I should get one. But, I can see the benefits and if you want to, rock on...

Yeah, I don't really understand the "answering the door" justification for playpens. I just carry my DD with me when the door rings.

I think one of the objections to playpens is that children learn so much from imitation and following you around the house. So when I am doing the laundry my DD (16 months) helps me sort and put things in the drier. She also "helps" hang it out. Cooking can be difficult but I put her on one side of the kitchen with some toys and she watches me from there. She has learnt not to come close to the oven (and the phrase "Hot! Hot!"). I think it is very important for children to see how food gets prepared rather than it just appearing on their plates.

As, the same goes for going to the bathroom. Children learn about going to the toilet through, I am a bit embarrassed to admit, by watching their parents.

If a child is in a playpen while you do chores etc then you also diminish your opportunity to talk to them and for them to develop their language skills.

So I think the further objection is the same as is given to reigns - it deprives children of the ability to learn to self-regulate because external barriers are put to them having to do so. We have never needed a playpen because my daughter has learnt that she is not to touch certain things by me teaching her that rather than simply putting them out of reach.

Of course this has its limits - I wouldn't leave things extremely dangerous (such as boiling water) in her way and simply tell her no. But then I don't think the majority of living rooms have such extremely dangerous things that a playpen, rather than other forms of discipline or else taking them with you when you leave the room can prevent.

Blimey, what a lot of fuss. Personally, a fab idea I think, DS1 loved his and did a fab comedy act pushing his face up against the mesh and pulling funny faces, and then roarng with laughter, he wasn't in there all the time, never when we weren't in the room with him, except toilet time (sometimes you just gotta go in peace, without all the loo roll being pulled out). Great for storing toys etc and I will be using it again for DC2. So there!

roaring

"it deprives children of the ability to learn to self-regulate because external barriers are put to them having to do so."

Oh please how do people come up with such rubbish!

I didn't use one with DD but I bloody well should have. I would use one now if I thought I could get away with it! (she's 2.10!). I think they're a great idea but it just didn't occur to me. SIL had one for my nephew and I was eaten up with jealousy at the ease with which she could get on with things while he played merrily. I never get got anything done

Ha ha bruffin

I don't mind DD running around whilst I tidy up/potter around the house.

Before she could climb out of the travel cot we used as a playpen, She would go in there whilst I had a shower. If I did'nt do this I have no idea how I would ever have gotten a daily shower.

Am expecting DC2 and will be using it again with him/her.

Chaya although your DD learns that the oven is hot and doesn't go near it by following you around,my DS learns the oven is hot and repeatedly tries to put his hand on it in order to get a reaction. I'm not going to let him burn himself in order to learn (although it might be the only way) and so the playpen is the best way to keep him safe whilst I cook.
So although your DD is fine to be out and about with no need for a playpen, my DS most certainly does need one. He's not always in one but in circumstances where he can't have myy full attention, it's in his best interests to be penned in safely.

I didn't use one with DTS's (now aged 22) but I probably will for short periods when DD due in Jan is mobile and I need to complete the odd chore/wee in peace.