to be most aggrieved that I did not get married off in the last IPOAT thread? Won't someone think of Nigel?

[BeribbonedGibbon]

Well, am I?

hully

Impressed by you chutzpah

You have to face the fear Jamie. The camp shop assistants are all part of the allure. I occasionally venture into Harrods because I always contrive to get lost in the chocolate department and eat my way out.

I agree with Hully

Its sounds great Lenin but it is behind a curtain and I am scared that they may be suckers or a vice type arrangement...
I would need assurances that they were all trainned
I should ask on S&B

I love Selfridges, when I lived in London it was short hop away to go 'up west' (we lived in the east, can you tell? )

Their window displays are always amazing...

haha, I meant I am sad for loving window displays so

I keep looking at my pre pregnancy skinny jeans and sighing, they currently stop at my knees.

I gave all mine away in heart-wrenching despair. And they were still too big for my cowbag friend.

I just can't seem to stay in the 'must stop eating like a pig possessed' mindset

thank you for the fine welcome, fair ladies (swishes crinoline and reticule in appreciation)

arse-measuring machine, shudder? sadly it's the non-beer belly that's the issue here with jeans.

JohnLewis haberdashery department is a different world. A more appealing world, where just the right cross-stitch kit or ball of yarn or knitting pattern makes life a better place.

yy anotherbrick - my first time and I was entranced. And the service! Noting was too much - they physically walked over to find things for me rather than pointing and grunting in a general direction.

Gibbon - it is a proven fact that sleep deprivation makes you crave Snickers bars carbohydrates

pag

Am imagining a device like the Clarks shoe-fitting machine when I was a child. Only for bums

I've found you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh and I'm not sure which Nigel I'm supposed to be thinking of as I am a latecomer so I have decided to think of this one

Nigel is my demi god offspring Jinny. He is eletrical and becoming quite a handful.

He does not however look anything like your link, he is far more handsome [biased]

Emerges from the grave, brushing off soil and worms. I am returned. Nerry a gnome did I see underground.Was hoping for cheers, but stunned silence will suffice. Alas I have no natty links to offer but Selfridges 'service' sounds interesting Do they sell mantillas?

I was thinking more Nigel as in Making Plans for Nigel (XTC).

Possibly Selfridge's would sell a suitable lacey tablecloth that could be adapted into a mantilla?

Whatever happened to XTC, after they had made plans for Nigel, I wonder.
Perhaps we could create a suitable home for Nigel the demi-god in a demi-john.

according to the fount of all knowledge wikipedia, they were active till 2005!, with greater critical and commercial success. though I prefer to think that having helicopter parented Nigel into a russell group university then accountancy career they considered their work done.

I am slightly worried about an electrical handful beribboned but I'm sure you've got it under control

The Nigel I am thinking of may not be as handsome but he has very kind eyes. Well actually one kind eye

Apologies for the dereliction of village matchmaker duties. I had literally, literally I tell you, just thought the thought 'we must be coming to the end of the thread, I'll just see how many posts we're up to', clicked back on thread and lo! 1001! Too late to use my powers, for the thread must be open before it ends.

An entertaining aside on the subject of 'literally'

Thoughts on thread so far:

Skin-nibbling fish = The Horror! The Horror! The thought of it makes me feel quite wrong.

Anotherbrick, welcome! I sense by your use of 'reticule' you are long-time lurker, first-time poster.

Hully, you feet are quite lovely. I remember them before the travelling pedlar man came last spring with his files.

Quite tempted by thought of Clarks' style arse measurer. Arse-o-gram.