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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be curious what you would tell your 16 yr old self now?

287 replies

WannabeNigella · 18/11/2010 22:26

Just wondered really, if you could just pass on one little nugget of wisdom to yourself at 16, what would it be?

Inspired by a trending topic on Twitter just in case any of you saw it.

OP posts:
Cyclebump · 19/11/2010 16:05

And your dad doesn't hate you, he's just frustrated because he doesn't understand you and feels bad about it. Don't wait until he has a massive stroke and can't talk for two months to realise you're the only one who can make him laugh while in intensive care because he thinks you're witty and clever.

dejavuaswell · 19/11/2010 16:05

Don't even think of doing A Level Maths.

Talk more to your sister Jane - she will die in her 20's.

You could have gone to Cambridge but by being a lazy idiot in the sixth form you will throw the chance away.

Ignore the careers teacher - the two careers you would have liked and have been best at were never even mentioned by her.

Yes your Dad was very stange - it is called Aspergers now.

Snakeears · 19/11/2010 20:00

Don't decide you're in love until you're at least 25!!

Snakeears · 19/11/2010 20:00

oh and chill out... don't take things (yourself) so seriously!

2anddone · 19/11/2010 20:14

Don't let anyone else end a relationship apart from the two of you that are in it or you will spend every day wondering what if, mainly because even at 32 you will still believe it was the real thing Sad

PavlovtheCat · 19/11/2010 20:15

go to more music concerts! be confident in the way i look/how people saw me as I actually had the best figure i ever had then. Do not give up on the sailing to be a goth Grin

whoknowswhatthefutureholds · 19/11/2010 20:26

getting stoned every day is not ok.

everyone is just as insecure as you.

Be nicer to your boyfriend he deseves it.

twopeople · 19/11/2010 20:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ModreB · 19/11/2010 20:42

Don't get that mortgage at 21, go for the rented council house instead, then wait and get a mortgage when you can get a good discount.

If you get that mortgage, you will have a millstone of debt round your neck for years, when you should be having fun.

missmoopy · 19/11/2010 20:42

Amphetamine is not your friend. Neither are most of the men you are attracted to. You are so much better than your father tells you you are.

Ripeberry · 19/11/2010 20:49

Stop trying to please parents all the time and don't take mum's threats to 'harm' herself seriously.

I was never allowed to 'rebel' as a teenager, felt like the daughter in 'Absolutely Fabulous' and my mum did all the drama queen, teenage selfishness stuff for me Angry

MittzyWithTinselOnHerBittzys · 19/11/2010 20:50

Get the motorbike.

Leave home.

Go to Africa as you planned.

Talk your Mum into leaving with you.

Walk tall baby, your OK but it will be a very very long time before you even start to believe that if you follow the path that you do.

Don't hate yourself. None of it was your fault xx

Bearsinthenight · 19/11/2010 20:59

You'll be a lot happier and perform better at A level in the local college than the snobby sixth form.

Get a different Saturday job, some people just aren't cut out to be waitresses Smile

Your Dad doesn't know everything about everything. In fact, he sometimes advises you kindly, but wrongly. Use your own judgement.

Don't perm your hair.. or get those extensions

Don't openly fawn over Nick from the kitchens in your Saturday job. He fancies Rebecca, not you, so save your dignity!

Cider is NOT your drink, pet, nor is any drink that comes in a pint glass. Get to know your single spirits and stick to them.

(this is quite fun!)

Natalie in sixth form will turn out to be a double-crossing witch. Steer clear.

PLEASE don't even think about doing political history a-level. It is harder than quantum physics and you will totally fail it Blush. Do Art instead and get an A grade like you were on course to, before Dad put other ideas in your head.

Lastly: don't worry, from the day you arrive at Uni life gets 1000% better Smile

Shelly32 · 19/11/2010 21:30

How ggod is life now? Might it be different if you'd done things differently back then?

If things could be the same as now and i could tell myself about the little things that may have made me happier, i'd prob say:

Don't base your opinion of yourself on what you THINK others think of you.

Cherish your parents. You may not think they are always right (and sometimes they aren't) but they want the best for you and when they are gone you will feel pain that is indescribable. You love your babies the way your parents love you (in most cases) but don't realise until you have children how powerful that love is.

Everyone has a different opinion on most things. Take the positive, ignore the negative. Don't sweat the small stuff. Life's too short. (only recently taken my own advice on that!!)

Laugh as much as you can and whenever you can.

Life willl turn out well and most ducklings turn into swans XX

freefruit · 19/11/2010 21:48

sod the prefessions get a job in IT
preferably self-employed

buy property
churn it

'retire' at 30!!!!

(OK maybe 35)

onmyfeet · 19/11/2010 21:50

Keep away from then bf, and go to nursing school.

BelleDameSansMerci · 19/11/2010 22:01

Your desire to be completely independent will mean that you end up lonely and alone (apart from your lovely daughter but you won't have her until you are nearly 42). I know that you are trying to protect yourself from more hurt and that you don't want to let anyone in but you need to. You will end up desperately wanting a relationship but you have no idea how to have one.

pink4ever · 19/11/2010 22:02

stop thinking your fat when your really slim and gorgeous(its all downhill from there).
Dont get so worked up about pulling boys constantly.Your friends are much more important.
That boy you thought was the love of your life at 17 would never have been right for you.
Get a proper degree in a real subject that will actually have some use in real world!.
Never ever forget how much you wanted to be a mother.

SalFresco · 19/11/2010 22:07

2anddone I could have written that, word for word Sad

30flirty · 19/11/2010 22:54

Do not settle down and marry the first bloke you meet, you'll miss out on so much and you'll regret it at 30 when it all catches up with you!!!

Kitta · 20/11/2010 00:44

In no order of importance:
Start saving now!
Go to the GP, stop being embarrassed and get your various gyne problems sorted before you end up in your 30?s with severe fertility problems as well as other linked issues. What you?re experiencing is not normal, you are not over-reacting/ being hysterical do not let some old git persuade you that you?re being a drama queen, every woman is not experiencing the same issues. Stop being an idiot, tell Mum she will go ape shit and push for you to be referred to the hospital, stop trying to be over grown up you don?t know everything!

The ?popular? girls don?t hate you, well they do but only because you intimidate them. (it's not your fault that the school skipped you ahead even though you're 'too' lazy to spell only (one teacher believed in dyslexia, you should have paid more attention to her))
Queen Bee of the school who seems to have made it her mission to make your life a misery will turn down a vgood uni place, marry her first boy friend at 18, who will continue to cheat on her as he has done from the first day they meet, will never leave the country even on a cheapie holiday and secretly envy?s you (you will find all this out in your 30?s when she drunkenly accosts when you visit home, and although you at 16 you would do a victory dance, at 30 you will feel sad for her, and her vomit will come out of your shirt, but really just throw it out) Sad
Be friends with the boys in your year, you can be just friends, you are not a whore or a slut for doing this; in 10 years time when some of them are your best friends you will regret missing those 10 years.
That older boy, you know who I mean, is not being romantic, jealously is never romantic, he is a stalker, take it seriously DO NOT BE flattered.
Buy shares in Apple
Save, money is freedom
Learn to drive; again doing this at 30 is a bitch
Realise that just because you?ve been friends since you were 4 does not mean you have to continue to be friends dump her now it will save you thousands of pounds and hundreds and hundreds of hours of whining phone calls .
Stick with the piano lessons, you?ll never be great, but you will always enjoy it.
Learn to touch type
Ignore anyone who tells you that your dyslexia will stop you going to uni, spell-check is just around the corner.
Take every opportunity to travel while you have no responsibilities, get a passport now.

Try to develop an adult relationship with your parents, they are amazing people, you?ll realise this once you stop being a brat, and you?ll have wasted 15 years.
Your just older sister is a bitch, it isn?t you, stop blaming yourself, you are 2 very different people, and you can love and support her without being joined at the hip.
Always buy good shoes
Stop being afraid of getting your eyebrows waxed, it will change how you see yourself, really, oh and the purple eye shadow. Throw it out now.
Vodka is bad evil gut rotting lovely delicious horrible stuff, never drink it. it will make you think you are smarter than you are, you will make bad decisions under its influence.
Learn to walk in high heels now, take lessons from your Mum she is a master.
Oh God there is so much more but I?m hijacking aren?t I

completelyabsolutely · 20/11/2010 01:02

In ten years time people will tell you how cool they thought you were - really I am not lying to you. Please don't spend the next five years putting yourself into stupid and potentially dangerous situations to get attention from unsuitable men to give your none existent self confidence a boost - being shagged by someone who doesn't give a toss about you will not make you feel better about yourself.

Be kind to yourself, you are nice and phone your nan xx

NotanOtter · 20/11/2010 01:17

dressing like a boy wont stop him
tell someone
drop your family now - none of them are worthy

the rest is all good (give and take a few dodgy boyfriends)

pottonista · 20/11/2010 01:29

Don't sleep with him, it won't make him like you. :(

SeaShellsFiringUpTheQuattro · 20/11/2010 01:42

Chill, stop worrying! People think you are gorgeous, you should too :)
That boy you've just spotted in the year above-enjoy the chase, 14 years later you'll still be amazing together.
Forget the bitches, they are long forgotten very soon.
Party more (but do still get those grades!)
Tell your parents to buy that house they were looking at-the market is about to boom.
Well done on avoiding the drugs and not smoking !!!!!!
Not so well done on the booze, but hey, you're a teenager.

Enjoy the next 2 years, they really are some of the best in your life Grin

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