"You may now kiss the bride"

[LornMowa]

All this talk of weddings has reminded my of my own. At the practice I specifically asked the priest not to say "YMNKTB". Firstly because I think snogging in church is tacky and secondly because I think it is up to me and my husband whether (and when) we kiss.

He still said it though - I just gave hubby a kiss on the cheek.

Was I unreasonable?

What is the teddy smiley all about? It isn't in my list Cordiality does that mean you are special

is it in light of children in need tonight?

It's a new one! Introduced after this hilarious thread
here
(long but well worth reading!)

Type bear, in square brackets.

but yes, bumps, on a separate note, I am indeed special!!

Kerry are you for real or do you seriously find it impossible to understand that other people are different to you?

Your kiss was not stagemanaged. Good for you.

If 'you may kiss the bride' had been included in my ceremony it would have been totally stagemanaged as I find the whole americanised concept (to go back to my oringal post) tacky and inappropriate. So does DH. Which is why we never even thought of including it. Our wedding Our choice. Our business.

A wedding is (or should be imo) a dignified, joyful,loving cermony celebrating 2 people wanting to spend the rest of their life together, sharing sex, yes, but also so much more.

"You may kiss the bride" treats the bride as a belonging and (for me Kerry if not for you)
would have trivialised something very important to me.

our vicar said she wasn't going to say anything about kissing (it's not in the official service words, as already pointed out)
When the time came, I was so confused as to where in the service we were (didn't expect that part to be so quick and thought we'd missed something like a hymn or anthem out!), that we didn't even realise when we were to kiss!

then i suddenly thought, "hang on, she's done the Let no man put asunder, we must be married", and said to DH, "i think wee're supposed to kiss here".
it took him by surprise too!

ruined the moment for me
and i felt like right prat.

Well I think "You may kiss the bride" is romantic and nice and doesn't hurt anyone.

Its most certainly not saying "tongues out, its snog time". I honestly can't find anything offensive about it. DH and I had a chaste but meaningful kiss on the lips, with lips closed. It was lovely, I think you'd have to be very churlish to find something offensive in it. What is the world coming to? Shall we just ban everything?

It isn't part of the service. When we met our vicar he said "if you must kiss her you can do so after you are declared husband and wife but I would really rather you didn't as it has never been part of the religious service and is just something that people do on films". He was a miserable old bugger.

notpart Bless.

we always kiss with just pursed lips like old-fashioned movie stars.

I do think you're being a bit harsh OP. What you wanted to do is great , and I think the kiss on the cheek sounds lovely, however I don't think I'd have wanted you at my wedding, sitting there with a cats bum mouth and judgypants on because I kissed my new husband in a less that chaste way in a CHURCH.

God invented sex, kissing your husband in a church can be a holy thing.

And as for your vicar, Nopart, how far back did he want to go? In biblical times they did little more than declare their intents and move in together - the traditions we have today throw back to ownership of women and don't bear feminist analysis. Thank Goodness we have a priest with a brain.

:o Kerry

I must have PMT, I didn't get this het up when I posted the other day...

PrincessBoo - i've done more than just kiss-peck in a church.

I had a full-blown passionate snog on the organ stool once.
with the organist.

before we were married

My vicar said "well x you may now give your wife her first kiss as a married woman" after dh had kissed me and everyone cheered he then said "and let me give mrs x her second kiss" he then gave me a peck on the check in a congratulations kinda way.

It was sweet but rather unexpected.

bumpnowjustplump
If you had read my posts properly, you will understand that on a personal level, I see marriage as purely a legal affair, therefore, I do not think that it is 'special' in any way other than in the legal sense.
This means that I do Not think for one second that cohabitees love each other less than the married and vice versa.
I, do, however, fail to see how a marriage can be viewed in the 'new start in life' sense if the couple have cohabited for years before hand.
This is not a judgement, just common sense.

Wahey Pombear! :o

This is SOOO interesting. I was a registrar for 5 years and many of my collaegues used to miss out the kiss bit if they didn't like the bride and groom- thought they were too full of themselves or rude or something.

Its now clear that missing the kiss bit is NOT the foolprrof registrar get-your-own-back act we all thought it was.

I'll spread the word!

In Italy they keep shouting "kiss" but the Italian word (which I can't remember) and the couple kiss. This goes on all day. You'd hate it there.

I went to an Italian wedding once, all the way through the reception people kept chinking their glasses with their cutlery, which was the cue for everyone to join in and the couple to snog, was great fun for all concerned but I wouldn't have wanted it that way at my own wedding, each to their own.

my DH only gave me a little kiss because he was a bit embarrassed, and my thought at the time was "I really hope the photographer got that!"

our photographer didn't get much in the way of posed photos - i don't like fake poses, and everything that we did that was natural we did too fast!
he even complained i walked down the aisle too quickly! I even went slower than on a normal sunday.