To want my ds2s birthday to be atleast acknowledged at my neices party on sunday

[springchik]

Its my neices 3rd birthday tomorrow. My brothers dd. My ds 3rd birthday on friday. He wont be having aa party as such as he doesnt really have any friends yet this will hopefully change next year when he starts preschool. Anyway he will have a little tea party on his birthday and a birthday treat of a day at the zoo on saturday. My neices party is on sunday. Each year I simmer inwardly as its always a few days after my ds birthday and noone including my parents even acknowledges it. This year its 2 days later next year it'll be the very next day. Have thought of sharing the party (at a soft play area) but sil wouldnt even consider it as she wants the focus on her dd.

I don't understand.

I have read your post three times!

Your son is having a party (doesn't matter if it's tea or what) AND a trip to the zoo.

Presumably your parents will send a card or present to your DS.

Why would they need to mention it on the Sunday too when his birthday is over????

YABU. If you want to focus on DSs birthday then hold a party for him.

YABU. I don't get why this bothers you, I don't get it at all. Do your parents celebrate your DS's birthday with you at his birthday tea?? If so, why would they need to make a big deal of it at your nieces party?

What 'acknowledgement' are you seeking? And do you 'acknowledge' your nieces birthday at your DS's party?

People are SO wierd!!

Don't go.

Are you saying your parents don't acknowledge your son's birthday at all...no card or gift?

YABU

surely your parents and family will acknowledge your DSs birthday ? so why should it be mentioned/have a fuss made 4 days later?

how strange you wold think his birthday takes precedence of over the birthday girl's at her party

of course SIL wants focus on her DD, same as you want it all, and more for your DS

Are your parents not coming to his tea-party?

incase you haven't realised. YABU.

your son is having a party for his birthday. he has ni need or entitlement tohave a mention ata another child's party jsut because it happens to fall within a few days of his. would you demand the same of all children in his class that have birthdays around teh same time?

Is your niece invited to your DS's tea party, and to the zoo trip? If so, will you be acknowledging her birthday in any way, singing happy birthday or anything? And if she's not invited then of course her party will be all about her.

The only way I can see you maybe having a point is if your niece comes to your DS's party, gets to blow out candles etc to acknowledge her day and then nothing similar happens when you go to them.

I don't understand what you mean at all. Whose birthday do your parents not go to?

If they don't acknowledge his birthday whatsoever and refuse to attend any sort of birthday gathering for your DS then YANBU.

If they give him a gift and come to any tea party you invite them to then I'm not sure what the bother is? Oddly quite alot of my family have birthdays witin a day of each other and some on the same day. Tis a total non issue for us.

weirdo

I would say if you wanted DS to be more the centre of attention then you should throw a big party, if you play it low key then you get low key,

Surely the family attend / are invited to both ?

Do your parents not acknowledge his birthday- or at your niece's party do they not acknowledge he has just had a birthday. If it is the latter then I can see where you are coming from but pragmatically you are being unreasonable, if it is the former, then run for the hills your family are a bunch of nutters and your DS is better off without them.
Hope this helps

Can the op clarify if she feels aggrieved because noone acknowledges her sons birthday AT ALL? In which case YANBU. If your son is acknowledged by everyone on his birthday, then you are BU. I want my kids parties to be about them, not someone else!

PS Especially if I'm paying for said party!

"This year its 2 days later next year it'll be the very next day."

How can their birthday be 2 days later, then the next day - surely a birthday is on the same day every year?

Are you saying your parents acknowledge your nieces birthday but not your sons?

Are you unhappy that your DN is having her party after your DS even though her birthday is before his

Also confused about simmering every year - there have only been 2 birthdays for each of them so far. And it doesn't sound like a very big deal to me.

Is the problem basically that you feel your parents generally favour your niece, and the birthday business is a red herring?

Sorry OP, but you need to clarify.
Does anyone in your family acknowledge your son's birthday? If his birthday is ignored thenobviously YANBU.
If however they make a fuss of him, buy presents etc, I don't know what you are complaining about