to still feel irritated when people say oh you're so lucky you got a boy and then a girl

[onceamai]

The truth of the matter was that dd was my sixth very planned pregnancy. I know I lost two boys, and every miscarriage broke my heart. Although I completely and utterly adore dd, I would have been very happy to have had two or even three boys and the you're so lucky remarks still annoy me and they're 11 and 15 now so this should all be history but people still say it; usually quite innocently.

You must feel lucky though after having had difficulties.

They were just being polite, if you'd had 2 boys they would have said how lovely they'll play together. Try not to take it to heart.

yes I do feel lucky and I rationalise it by thinking that if it hadn't happened I wouldn't have the same two children and I cannot imagine better ones.

People don't know your history- they're just making conversation.

When people tell me I'm lucky to have two boys I fervently agree with them as I lost 3 between DS1 and DS2 and the 3rd loss was a girl. I am just lucky to have two babies at all.

I'm very sorry for the losses you suffered, but friendly small talk is better than total silence, don't you think?

But it so often comes from people with two boys who have a nice neat little two year gap.

As someone once said to me - YABOS (over-sensitive).

I have three boys and it is the kind of thing I might say in passing - no agenda.

I am sorry to hear about your losses. That must hurt a great deal.

YABU a lot of people would like one of each sex so they consider you are lucky. What's the problem>?