To not really want to buy my nieces and nephews christmas presents?

[BBQSteak]

maybe i'm just being a tight arse.

i have 2 siblings with 6 children between them.
we have 1 dc

we usually all spend about 25 pounds per child.
so to buy gifts for them costs us

150pounds

tbh, i would prefer to spend that on our dc.

as we only have a budget of 75pounds for our child.
which isn't alot

and to be totally honest, i suppose it's a bit to do with the fact the numbers are uneven.
it wouldn't be quite so bad if we had three children too.
but i don't know if thinking like that is totally out of order and i'm just being a tightwad and a bit of a bitch

its not that we can't afford it, we can just about, be to be toatlly honest i'd rather spend the money on us, our dc and being able to spend a bit more on the day with food/drink etc

I think you're being tight tbh. We have the same problem with my SIL who, although mostly lovely, has a bee in her bonnet about the fact that she is the only person in the fmaily not to have children. That's not our fault and any time we've told her (nicely) not to get DD anything, we get the sulks.

We have one child, my brother has three. Such is life. I don't think you can pick and choose like that.

yes you are being a bit tight!

Could you limit just the amount you spend?

You are not being a bitch. I love buying for children though, it is the adults I find difficult. You can get really nice gifts for children for well under £25 each, though. Put a budget of £10 per child, buy novelty gifts from the internet or supermarket clothes (assuming this is acceptable within your family) and spend the remainder you would have spent on you, DH and DC. Happy shopping!

How old are they? Amazon voucher for £15 perhaps?

YANBU. Our family is massive (Irish) and we put a stop to all that nonsense of buying for nephews and nieces and cousins once removed etc by just buying them all one family present for everyione to share - and by one present, I mean just a big tin of Quality street or something equally useful.

Otherwise we'd all be spending about £3,000 on individual presents. Pointless.

do the argos 2 for £15 deal. You get 6 decent presents for £45.

Yes, don't spend so much on them. Try and get something they will love. And you do sound tight

I would just spend less on each child.

There are loads of offers on in the chains right now with "better than half price" and "buy one get one free" and "2 for £so much"
take advantage of those - then you can buy £25's worth of stuff for £12.50.

I'd agree you sound tight - buying presents isn't meant to be about balancing up the value of what you buy for them and what they buy for you. It's meant to be about showing that you love/like/value them as people.

If you are struggling to manage 6 @ £25, then you could think about whether you could go down a notch on how much you spend per child. But only because it's a struggle, not because what you spend is more than what they spend on you and your DC.

... sorry scrap that - you don't sound tight, but it does sound as if the true meaning of buying presents has got a bit lost somewhere

I mean, you could say that about anything. I don't fancy spending my money on whatever, would rather spend it on me. Any one of us could find 100 better uses for our cash.

I've bought family pressies before now. Games are good. DB and SIL gave us mancala last christmas - was a good gift.

Well I have 3 dc. Sil has one. I usually feel bad about the present thing. I wouldn't mind at all if she spent less on each of mine so that we each spent the same per family iyswim.

Btw we don't buy for adults in the family if they have dcs which helps...

When I was a child some of my parents friends would send a present for the whole family, I think one of the more recent was a hamper of Thorntons choccies .
Could you do something similar, perhaps a lovely wooden version of a board game like Ludo, or a big jigsaw for them to work on together - plus mini individual treats?

Should make it cheaper for you without reducing the quality of the gift IYSWIM

x-post with gore oops.

Cut the budget in half? I spend no more than a tenner on everyone, bar DC and DP. Do you have to spend £25 on each child? Seems a bit excessive imo if you don't want to/can't afford to spend that amount on them.

I have no children. Yet I have to buy for 12.
I get no where near what I give them.

But I buy things throughout the year. I refuse to buy toys. I only give books. 12 books at 2 for 1 sales costs me about 40 pounds.

Done, wallet not empty, nice presents for everyone.
And remember it is the thought that counts.

sorry, add on my four nannying charges and it is 16 children.

It seems a bit sad to me that you're resenting buying presents for your nieces and nephews. I'm quite excited about buying stuff for mine and keep seeing toys that they'd love - and I'm on quite a low income.

I wouldn't spend £25 on each present though - there's plenty of offers around so that I could spend a tenner and probably get a toy that's 'worth' at least twice as much.

We have a £10 ''rule'' and love trying to get the best Value and perfect present in the price zone. Fly lady - budget don't begrudge it!

YANBU - our family is also irish and we would be bankrupt if we got everyone a £25 present

we are leading the charge towards family presents and away from multiple small ones. eg we got three of our nephews a tent to share last year. I don't personally like all the present-buying-madness of Christmas, I am more an open-fire-carols'n'Midnight Mass type and tend to think everyone goes a bit crazy over the buying part and forgets the rest.

I don't think you're being tight. I have SILs who agree how much we should spend each and then specify that it should be cash when they have 3 DCs each and I have 2.
So I hand over £60 cash per family and get £40 cash back . Spirit of Christmas getting a bit lost when it becomes such a financial transaction.
I much prefer to spend a bit of time finding a decent present for each child within MY budget - not an externally imposed one. By looking for bargains, special offers you can get something a child will cherish instead of just money.
I did try cutting back and bought £15 gift vouchers for shops I knew each individual child would love. Their mum promptly reduced what she was giving my DCs to £15/head too...

YANBU.Just say you are scaling everything down this year

ouch! glad you're not my aunty. . Just spend less and get bargains - a trip to TK Maxx would sort it all out cheaply. You don't have to spend £25 although as you say you can afford it. Let's hope you don't have extra children in the future or it may be your own little ones wondering why aunty and uncle didn't get them a christmas pressie.

if you cant afford 25 each just look out for somethings within your more realistic budget, then no need to begrudge them