To not really want to buy my nieces and nephews christmas presents?

[BBQSteak]

maybe i'm just being a tight arse.

i have 2 siblings with 6 children between them.
we have 1 dc

we usually all spend about 25 pounds per child.
so to buy gifts for them costs us

150pounds

tbh, i would prefer to spend that on our dc.

as we only have a budget of 75pounds for our child.
which isn't alot

and to be totally honest, i suppose it's a bit to do with the fact the numbers are uneven.
it wouldn't be quite so bad if we had three children too.
but i don't know if thinking like that is totally out of order and i'm just being a tightwad and a bit of a bitch

its not that we can't afford it, we can just about, be to be toatlly honest i'd rather spend the money on us, our dc and being able to spend a bit more on the day with food/drink etc

My partner and I have 7 (soon to be 8) nieces and nephews between us. Presents do end up costing alot, so for christmas we only spend about £10 on each, and slightly more for their birthdays as then at least the cost is spread out.

I think you don't really need to be spending £25 per child. It does come to alot.

LOL @ Fly lady - budget don't begrudge it!

yes i could cut down the budget and say 10/15

or i could suggest we stop buying for each other

i must admit i am quite a tight person anyway.
i realise i am a bit like that

£25 each is crazy money.

I'm the same as Serenity, actually - all my nephews and niece get books.

One year, when I was particularly broke, one of my nephews got an "arrived damaged" book from the shop I worked in.
These are books that arrive damaged ( ), and cannot be sold, so the title page is ripped out and returned. What happens is that staff then read them, and do reviews or whatever. I had so little money that my nephew got one of those for his present. He still loved it, and it's the thought that counts (it was The Owl who was Afraid of the Dark, what's not to love!)

The point I'm trying to make is that it really doesn't matter how much the thing costs, it's whether you think that they'll like it, love it or be able to use it.

( it just took me 15 minutes to write that!!!)

YABU and tight as a ducks arse.

We have this in our family, in that my brother does not yet have children, yet he buys for mine. So I just make sure I'm pretty generous with his gift and always buy his partner something really nice too.

Tatty, my sisters both buy pressies for me and DH because we don't have children - we buy for the children, and my sisters get nothing.

Meany

(from us, they do get presents!!)

I'm beginning to think maybe we shouldn't ttc, cos we'll not get presents then....

Do you think you'll have more children? If yes then those extra children will get presents as they grow up.

But I would see if you could cut back a bit anyway now you have a child of your own, we spend £10/15 on nieces and nephews, it used to be more before we had our own children, but I cut it back once we had out first.

When we all first had kids we agreed that adults with DCs didn't get presents. But my sisters didn't want to give up buying for me so I made sure they (and their partners) got really nice presensts from us to make up.
Plus we usually host Christmas dinner so feed them lots of wine and other goodies.
Also, encouraged DCs to make or buy small gifts for their aunties and uncles so it's not all one way.

How can you suggest not buying for your nieces and nephews? . Adults yes, but if you don't buy children presents then you might as well give up Christmas. Adults eat and drink, children get presents, even small ones.

tbh, i'd probably just prefer to stop exchanging gifts, as i can't really be doing with trudging round the shops,or spending ages searching the net, wrapping them all up, trying to hide them, delivering them etc

yes i am a bit of a cow, i admit it.

but i suppose if we cut down it wouldn't be so bad, before we had dc we used to spend 40 on each.
25 is probably too much

Right, now you are sounding like a tight arsed misery.

Are you my sil? lol

YABU, we have 3 dcs, as do dh's brother and his wife. Dh's sister on the other hand has only one dc and I agree its a lot for them to have to fork out for 6 children every year, even though they are a lot better off than us and can probably afford it.

That said, I think £25 is a lot to spend on each child. We have an agreed £10 limit per niece and nephew, as we also have another 4 neices and nephews plus a couple of great nephews to buy for on my side of the family.

Both BIL and ourselves have tried to asking if it would be ok if we only bought for the children rather than all the adults (and there are a lot of them), but dh's family were extremely unhappy about it, so it wasn't workable. Think "you only have to get me something like X" (not something cheap by our standards) from MIL and "you can't not buy for your Great Aunt, she's always been so good to us" etc etc. We tried giving lovingly handmade gifts to the adults one year, but they got short shrift as well.

We really can't afford to buy for so many people and having been together for 23 years, we are pretty much out of inspiration for gifts now anyway. I am finding I end up feeling guilty for resenting the money we have to spend out on gifts we know are not appreciated (mainly because we can't afford to buy the sort of things they like). Time and again we have seen carefully chosen gifts given away to other people or shoved in the back of cupboards or worse, in the garage, whilst the more expensive gifts from sil are proudly shown off to everyone that crosses the threshold. It was the final straw this year when MIL threw away all the photos of the GC she had been given over the years and gave the frames to her neighbour! It makes me not want to bother, but I know that will just make for bad relations in the future.

I am ashamed to say, but it makes be that dh has had to take on extra work, just to pay for the christmas presents for people who don't appreciate them, yet insist we buy them every year or risk being pillaried by the family. Especially when things are so tight at home and there are lots of other things we could do with that money.

i probably am a tight arse misery.

yet you can be arsed to buy for your own child. What a meany, you're like the Grinch who stole Christmas. Makes me feel very indeed.

BBQ - you sound a bit down. I do sympathise - I go through phases of being peed off about Christmas

lol
i have not seen that film so i don't know

if i had loads of money i wouldn't mind then.

of course i can be arsed for my dc.
as i know dc will like what dc already has etc etc

So you feel you don't know what your nieces and nephews are like, so it all seems a bit pointless? - What about Cinema vouchers ?

Right, ages and genders please, I think we can sort this in twop minutes

two not twop

My dad was one of 7 and my mum was one of 4. I had hundreds of Aunties and Uncles and loved Xmas as a child. All those pressies were small ones though. Selection boxes/plastic tat etc. I didn't care. £25 a pressie means spoiled children imho.

of course i know what they are like, but i don't always know if a cartain thing will be a hit or miss, or if they already have it etc

i'm not down at all.
i LOVE christmas