to want my DC to only have wooden toys? (Or is this a case of PFB Syndrome?)

[LovestoLove]

I don't think I'm generally PFB - I want my child to respect adults, eat with no fussing/faddiness (or at least no reaction on my part), have no quibbles about the step, won't give copious amounts of juice/biscuits, won't give into tantrums, etc.

But I really have a thing about the bucket loads of plastic toys that I fall over when at friends' homes.

I love wooden toys/puzzles, books, cloth dolls, make-believe things, fancy dress, etc.

Is it totally unreasonable of me to ask parents, in-laws, and anyone else who's expressed interest in getting a baby gift to get something wooden/natural? I know wooden toys are generally seen as more expensive but I've found some on Ebay and other sites that aren't bad.

Or am I going to be seen as crazy? I'm 30 weeks pregnant by the way with DC1.

We bought DD1 loads of lovely wooden toys which just didn't inspire her in quite the same way as the plastic tat seems to do.

I think the thing with wooden toys is, yes, they look nice, yes, they're better for the environment, but generally speaking, they're harking back to a bygone time when children were happy playing with pretty basic stuff. Things have, perhaps sadly, moved on.

I don't think it's realistic to only permit wooden toys!

One big warning on wooden toys; they REALLY HURT if a toddler chucks one at you!

Messylittlemonkey: I'm trying to think exactly which toys can only be made out of plastic and not natural materials (wood, metal, textiles etc).

Ok, I've thought of children's computers (laptops?), although they can be made out of metal. And a paddling pool. And DVDs.
Batteries can be put into wooden and metal things if bleeps, flashes and eletronic
music is needed.

Wooden toys don't only encompass spinning tops and peg dolls!

What else? What toys are only available in plastic?

Loves - Congratulations on your pregnancy and I hope the last few weeks go smoothly.

I'm not sure you can totally avoid plastic. DD is about to turn one I can't imagine how I would have survived the year if I hadn't been able to put her in her plastic, music & lights jumperoo for a bit each day while I showered/had lunch etc. However, all of the presents which have been provided by grandparents and other important people have been wooden (eg Noah's Ark, wooden activity cube, toddle truck and, as of her birthday, pram and trike) on the basis that they will definitely last for future siblings/neices and nephews/my grandchildren (!!) and, as they look nice, I'm going to be more willing to give them house space when they're not being used. Other items will end up being lent on to friends (and not necessarily collected), sold at NCT sales etc as, long term, we're never going to have room to keep everything.

If you do end up with lots of plastic, then get a couple of large trunks in which you can just shove everything at the end of the day.

"Ok, I've thought of children's computers (laptops?), although they can be made out of metal."

Or wood.

No such thing as a wooden bath toy!

"I want my child to respect adults, eat with no fussing/faddiness (or at least no reaction on my part), have no quibbles about the step, won't give copious amounts of juice/biscuits, won't give into tantrums, etc."

Good luck with it!

PS "no quibbles about the step" - what did you mean? x

I love your OP, you sound exactly like me when I was pregnant. Fast forward 7 years and I'm holding my sides laughing now.

Oh Bumpsadaisie, you see that is where I went wrong! Unlike the OP, you see, I dreamed of a child who would be rude to adults, who would be very fussy about food, and would eat biscuits all day long. Doh! What a FOOL I've been.
(step quibbling I had no opinion about, I must admit. Is it some kind of dance move?)

i have a strict no toys with batteries rule for our house. mainly cos they drive me mad not for any pretentious brain development shite. toys with batteries some how end up at granny's

LarkinSky, I don't know if tapes or DCs count as toys, but my DCs wore out many, especially in the car (thinking here of driving round and round desperately looking for a fabric shop that was conveniently located behind another building so invisible from the street, to the strains of 'Do Not Wubba Me Or I Will Wubba You') and learned to listen, sing along, get the words right (or hilariously wrong occasionally). Singing and rhyme are tremendously useful pre-reading experiences.

We have a Tomy Megasketcher that has served us really well for ages. They all still doodle on it. Any writing toys, paints, crayons, and easels are fab imo. And they all got endless play out of little tea sets of various materials and a tiny (wooden) stove/storage for pots thing, plus a cash register (plastic), and a series of little doll buggies and Corolle dolls, not to mention all the ball games that would be impossible without plastic balls, bats, and the bicycle helmets that have saved them from many a head injury. And where would we be without Playdoh, or Lego, or Tetris and other hand held games for long car trips...

Reading the OP again, I see a good deal of anticipation of future battles with the DC (the step, the tantrums, the food thing, wanting respect for adults) and with the family and friends over the toys, and I hope things will turn out to be less grim than envisioned.

gaaaagh , that's CDs, not DCs as toys [hblush]

That's a good point, Mathanxiety, far from us 'experienced mums' (ha!) painting a grim picture of motherhood, I think the OP does that all by herself with her fretting about how to discipline the hell out of her naughty child before he/she is even born. As I said, often letting kids do stuff and make decisions for themselves and allowing them to be shy and eat the food they like is a very nice part of parenting. If you set yourself up to battle with your child over everything before the mite is even born, then I think that's a bit sad. If I had another child I'd probably let them do whatever they wanted You don't have to say 'no' all the time to be a good parent. Letting children be themselves, and in the process finding out who they are in all their unique glory, can be amazing. (which is not to say I don't shout and grump at them from time to time like anyone else).

Ha ha ha ha ha!

'He collects model cars (metal) and loves LEGO which, as I said earlier, I find perfectly acceptable'

This is what I fail to understand-surely it is what your DC finds acceptable? We had our turn with toys and I am sure that we all had our favourites-very often they were not our mother's favourites-I know that mine was a dog on wheels, my mother gave it away when she thought I was too old-I still haven't forgiven her!!!!
Children are not accessories-toys are not supposed to be aesthetically pleasing to the adult. Wooden toys are lovely-we had lots- but we had plastic tat which gave a lot of joy too. (In the loft I have kept things which had the most play value, some are wooden but plastic Fisher Price is there too). I don't think it does to get too fussy-wooden, plastic, saucepans, old cardboard tubes all have their place. The only important issue is -does it let your DC use their imagination. I really can't see that the material that it is made from matters-or the colour.

I forgot about this type of worry. I used to do this when DS was about six months old. Needless to say the plastic crap invasion toys become less relevant when you're falling over them, it still hurts whether it's wooden or plastic!

Fisher Price plastic toys last for decades.
My DC have the classic plastic record player and records from the 70s that I played with as a child and it's still in great nick.
Same goes for the wheel along telephone and the strap on cot toy with the little bunnies.
also the wind up TV with music and pictures rolling past.
Also the Fisher Price classic little people with the bus and family.
All classic toys and all plastic.

Have a look on ebay if you want to be more Eco and sustainable with your toy buying. Reusing second hand toys is the best way to help the environment.

Pisces, of course he finds his toys acceptable otherwise he wouldn't play with them! I was simply saying that I find Lego acceptable as a plastic toy even though we prefer wood for other things and that it possible to have a wide range of toys, games, cars, puzzles etc without having plastic everywhere.

oh and at 'HELLO PUPPY CALLING'

That toy is actually called 'Puppy calling' in our house

"surely it is what your DC finds acceptable?"

I don't fully agree with this. Of course children can make their choices on what they will play with based on what they prefer from the selection available, but parents have a say in this too. My parents gave me lots of wonderful gifts when I was a child, some I asked for, some were surprises, and some things I wanted but I was never allowed - for various reasons but usually cost and whether they thought it was 'appropriate' (e.g. no cabbage patch dolls, no garbage pail kids cards, no watching grange hill; would have to ask my mum for earlier examples!). Of course all children have personalities and it would be mean to disregard all of their preferences (esp if for selfish reasons), but in the end it's the parent who pays and is in charge.

Not if it is a present given by someone else runningrach. If Granny happens to know that the DC is longing for Barbie and gets her one, it is very mean of the mother to take it away-if she knows her DC wants a Barbie.
It isn't hurting anyone and it isn't hurting the DC.

He would find them acceptable bubbleymummy, but he would equally find plastic Fisher Price acceptable if given the option.

Well I would actually be pretty annoyed if my mum or mil bought something that they knew I disapproved of. I am not talking about plastic vs wood here but with the Barbie example, I know some people have very strong opinions about them and whether or not they want their child to play with them. It is not the grandparent's place to override a parental decision no matter how much the child may want something.

The only reasons I would every say no to a toy is expense, but if the dcs want to save up for them, they can have it, or space. My DD 13 wants a Hornby but we have no where at all to put it. If I could I would have it made up so it would slide under her bed, but we can't.
I would never dictate to anyone what they can and can't buy my children. Happy to give them ideas but would never prevent a children from having a present.
Neevr understand the banning of barbie or bratz , as if the doll would influence my children more than I do.

Toys are presents for children not me.